Is there any place for fun on the ascension path?

The last several messages have been somewhat intense, so I thought we would have a little more fun this time. In this message we will talk about fun, joy, and play. Perhaps you are taking things too seriously. If what you are experiencing is an illusion, why not have more fun with it? I have an assignment for you. Each time you find yourself being weighed down by the seriousness of your now moment, think up a joke about your situation. Make it so funny that you can’t wait to find an audience to share it with.

You are aware that your Divine nature is the truth of you. You understand that you don’t have a lot of control over how long it will take until you fully realize your Divinity and leave this physical illusion. In the meantime, since you have nothing really important to do – except, of course, whatever Spirit has in mind for you – you might as well have fun. If there is to be a choice between joy and misery, between fun and boredom…..is this a hard decision to make?

It is not so easy to have fun when you are feeling like a victim, so those thoughts and feelings will have to be jettisoned. It is also quite a challenge to enjoy yourself when you feel weighed down by lots of responsibilities. It is time to let go of them as well. Perhaps you feel that you have to earn your fun time, so you will work now and play later. Try turning that one around. If you are truly doing God’s work you will be feeling ecstatic. The teaching from the mass consciousness is that this world is a very serious place and that you have to apply yourself, work hard, and make the right choices or life will just run you over. Such a responsibility you have! When you look at that it is overwhelming. Sometimes it just makes you want to lie down and die. That couldn’t be any worse than living with that much pressure. But, unfortunately, it is not okay to die. That is not one of the choices. You have to let God kill you. Am I the only one seeing the humor in all of this? Instead, be counter-intuitive. Decide that nothing here matters, that there is nothing important to do. None of it means anything. You might as well dance and sing and play and do whatever is fun. This leads to the hilarious irony of the human condition. When you want to leave because you can’t take it any longer, you can’t. You are stuck. Even if you break the biggest taboo and off yourself, you will eventually come back and pick up where you left off. But, when you are having so much fun that you couldn’t imagine wanting to be anywhere else, that’s when you might leave.

The world has it pictured that if you want to go to heaven, ascend, or get off the wheel you will have to work really hard. To achieve such a goal you have to pray, be good, and deny yourself. There is so much that is required every day, every moment. It’s impossibly hard. Then you die and you come back and do it all again. The counter-intuitive thing is not to try to do any of those things. You don’t try to be good. You don’t try to be right. You don’t try to do any of the things that the ego says you should do. Instead you ask yourself what would be fun today. What is your play in this moment? Even if there are dishes piled up in the sink, have fun. Maybe you put on earphones and listen to music while you are cleaning. Maybe you play with bubbles. Allow it to be fun. Tell yourself that if it isn’t fun, it isn’t worth doing. Joy becomes your value. This becomes your training. When that voice comes in and says “Yes, but you should….”, you jump up and say, “I know who you are! I don’t listen to you anymore.” You can recognize the voice when you hear the devil. The devil’s middle name is “Should”.

The funny thing is that this is true about everything. Whatever you think it is that you want – let it go. Just have fun. You think you want a relationship. Let it go. Look around at your friend’s relationship. Does that look like fun? Let it go. Have fun. Maybe one day part of your fun will include playing with someone else, someone who wants to have as much fun as you do. But, what is important is having fun, not having the relationship. If you have to give up fun to have a relationship, well that’s no fun at all. Replace the word relationship with anything else…money, dependable car, children who listen – it doesn’t matter what it is. If you really think you want whatever it is, then give it to Spirit. Spirit runs a highly efficient lost and found department. Everything gets to where it is needed. If it will truly increase your joy, it will come to you. If it is something that will end up taking away your joy, that will be a struggle – do you really want that? It’s a strange thing. You say to God or Spirit that you want something. You ask for it because you think it will make you happy. Cut out the middle man. Don’t ask for what you think will make you happy. Just ask for happiness. Ask to be eternally joyous. If you knew how to do that, you would have done it long ago. But admit that you don’t know anything, especially about how to be happy. So who are you to be demanding certain things, thinking they will bring you happiness. Be a happy idiot. Turn it all over to Spirit.

This includes ascension. Look at the fuel you have given to the ego when you ask for that. “You think that you can ascend? You think you are good enough for that. Oh, you’ve got a lot of work to do.” And you are off to the races. What you want is total ecstasy. When you experience that in a body, there is an opening to realize ascension. Ascension is not getting out of jail; it is the knowing that there is no jail. When in doubt, laugh. When unable to laugh, cry. Then let it all go. You probably didn’t hear it here first, but “don’t worry, be happy”. Remember always….

Good Blesses You

Sanhia

What is the difference between a special and a holy relationship?

One of the goals of most people, including those on a consciously chosen spiritual path, is to find that special relationship, that special person, that soul mate that completes you. My job today is to throw cold water on that dream. This topic, like many we discuss, could be covered in book length form, but we will narrow the focus to making a few observations.

Let’s start at a basic level. A pattern that tends to happen in relationships is that you are attracted to another person for certain qualities that they seem to have. Perhaps it is a physical attraction; you like the way they look. It might be their smile or there is an incredible sexual energy between the two of you. Maybe you are drawn to them intellectually; you like the way they think and you enjoy talking together. It may be common interests that draw you together – you share a love for music or the outdoors. Perhaps the connecting bond is of a more spiritual nature. In all likelihood, it is some combination of these different possibilities. What commonly happens is that the thing that initially attracted you eventually becomes an issue that you have difficulty dealing with. What you once loved now gets under your skin. Perhaps you then decide to leave and try another relationship. You go through the same cycle again and again. Or at some point you might decide to settle with the relationship you are in, rationalizing that overall, the pluses overrule the minuses. Maybe you have a lot of time invested in the relationship, and/or children, and/or shared property or a business. But these days, people are more likely to leave, choosing a relationship that fits them better.

Why does this pattern occur? Why don’t we just fall in live and live together happily ever after? Let’s focus on two reasons. First, as we mentioned, you are drawn to this other person because of certain qualities they possess. You want them to continue to be that way, to please you as they initially did. This is what we call conditional love – as opposed to loving them simply for whom they are, allowing their sense of identity and person-hood to evolve and change. Instead you love them for whom you perceive them to be, and if they perform in any other way you are upset and feel betrayed. Then you may begin to look around. The truth is that they never were who you thought they were. You projected upon the other person what you wanted to see. Conditional love is the first major roadblock to creating a successful relationship. The other person is not acting as you wish them to; this is not acceptable.

The second challenge is a little more subtle. You are looking for someone to make you whole. There may be thoughts such as “I can’t live without you”, or “You are my better half”, or “We complete each other”. You are thereby expressing the judgment that in order to be truly happy, you require someone else’s loving approval. We call that codependency. You depend on somebody else to be satisfied. You have a need for the other, which brings on an anger directed at them for that dependency. It is a place where you can’t win. Part of you wants to push the other away and the other part can’t live without them and wants to hold on. It sounds pretty hopeless and sad. How can one ever have a successful relationship?

The relationships we have been talking about are special relationships. You hold the other as being more special than all other people. It’s the flip side of you not being enough. You make them more than enough, so they must eventually let you down. You are not seeing yourself as divine. You cannot experience your divinity and, at the same time, have a need for a special relationship. Special relationships are built upon your fear of and separation from God. They stem from the belief that you have to be special in order for God to forgive you. Since God never judged you, no amount of specialness will do the trick. There is no need to earn forgiveness. God loves you unconditionally. However, the ego believes that if you can find somebody special who also believes that you are special, maybe God can find you special, too. If that specialness ceases to exist, what is God going to do to you?

The resolution of this quagmire is in seeking a holy relationship rather than a special one. A holy relationship is grounded in unconditional love. You have no expectations for the other person; you hold no judgments. No matter what your partner does, you love and accept them. This thought brings terror to the hearts of most people. It brings on fears of being a helpless victim. I want to remind you that your partner is your mirror. Whatever you judge in them, you judge in yourself. You can use your desire to control or change them to instead forgive and love yourself for whatever it is you perceive in them. Acknowledge that this is you. The ego wants to pretend it is not. The ego wants to point the finger so that you can stay special in God’s eye. The ego wants the other to be the one punished. Take responsibility. Acknowledge that this is you and forgive yourself and your partner.

Accept that your record in choosing partners has been less than stellar. Give the job of attracting your next partner to Spirit. Your holy partner will have one function and one function only. That is to be aligned with you in realizing personal divinity. It is possible for you to have a holy relationship where your partner does not share that intention, but it puts all the weight on your shoulder because your partner is expecting a special relationship. For you to act in the “right” way for them all of the time will be a major challenge for you. They will not be happy to find you choosing God over them.

I will tell you quite honestly that if your intention is to be absolutely true to yourself and to love yourself unconditionally in order to realize your divinity, you have a real challenge to accomplish that within any relationship. There are few models out there in how to behave in a holy relationship. The mass consciousness only shows you special relationships as the ideal. In fact, you may find this work easier to do when you are not in a relationship. It is said that when the student is ready the teacher will appear. I will modify that to say that when the person on the ascension path is ready, the partner will appear. Many of you have this thinking reversed. You seek the partner first, who will magically bring you to heaven, rather than first becoming what you wish to attract. When you get to the point where you realize you don’t need a partner to support your spiritual growth, you may attract one. Neediness will only attract a special relationship.

All that has been said up to this point is here to support you in being able to make the choice for a holy relationship. Once you have made that choice, you are really on your own. As mentioned, there are no models out there for how to proceed. You don’t know how to behave in a holy relationship. The only thing certain is that the ego will struggle to salvage something special out of it. All that you can do is to notice moment by moment where you have attachment to anything about your partner or the relationship and give it to Spirit. The holy relationship is fully guided by Spirit, as the special relationship is guided by the ego. To give yourself a fighting chance in your holy relationship, it is helpful if your partner and you have this as a shared, expressed intention and agreement between you. In this way you travel through the darkness together. You did not create this illusion and physical body to be experienced alone. You created other people so that you could project your guilt and fear on them. By yourself you could live in the illusion that none of that exists, but when you are in the presence of others, your judgments are inescapable. This allows you to see them and to take ownership of them. Your partner is always going to fulfill this function for you above all others.

When you intentionally take on the holy relationship, you learn to take 100% responsibility for everything that happens. If you allow yourself to be a victim to or in blame of your partner about anything, you are in illusion and denial. This is the challenge. It is also a great gift and a great opportunity. When two people choose to have a holy relationship, the ascension process is accelerated for each of them. It supports both in looking at the truth and in doing the required work. The irony and ecstasy of it all is that when you release the expectations of conditional love, you open up the possibility of enjoying full and complete happiness in the relationship. There is no limit to the upside of a holy relationship. The downside is no different than that of a special relationship. But, you have the momentum with you that comes from having chosen a holy relationship. Spirit is always there to support you. The perfect thing is always happening in your holy relationship to support your realization of your divinity. The only commitment that you can truly make in a holy relationship is to see divinity in your partner and in yourself in every moment, and to forgive and let go of anything that does not live up to that. That is God’s relationship with you always, except that there is no work involved for God. He always sees you as perfect.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

What if my “old stories” are good ones?

We have talked many times about changing your “old stories”, taking responsibility for the things that trigger pain and suffering in your life, and facing the fears connected to those stories using the five-step process. Many of you have done wonderful work in transforming these fears and experiencing more love and peace in your lives. This message is for you. If you have not yet chosen to take responsibility for your “old stories“, doing so may be the next step for you. For the rest of you, please read on.

It is not only the fear-based “old stories” that keep you stuck.  All of your stories keep you mired. What do you mean by that Sanhia? There are stories that give you a positive feeling, stories like: “My intelligence is a great asset”, “I am good at healing my body”, “People like me and I get along well with others”, “I am beautiful (handsome)”, or “I have a wonderful primary relationship”. These are things that others might look on with envy. You may look at them and say that even though you have pain and crap in your life, you have this to feel good about. All of these feelings stand in the way of realizing your ascension.

We have talked some before about special relationships. It is not our purpose to go into that subject today, though we intend to cover it more fully in a future message. When you like things about yourself, as we have just described, or are happy about how things are working out in your life, it is like having a special relationship with yourself. You are seeing yourself as special. As with the sad stories, there is a basis of comparison. With the painful stories there is a sense that others are faring better than you are. With the success stories or positive qualities there is a comparison with those who have less. What you are creating is a sense of being special or different, whether that difference is felt as a positive or a negative. Behind all of this is a desire for God to notice how special you are. You are so special that God doesn’t have to punish you now. Either you are so good that God will want to reward you, or you are so bad that you are already punishing yourself (or is it God who is already punishing you?). These are just two sides of the same coin. The special relationship is the same as the un-special relationship. Neither is holy. They are either especially good or especially bad. But the holy relationship is divine and perfect as it is. You are perfect as you are.

You can thank Spirit for gifting you with whatever seems positive so that you can use it to realize your divinity, as you can also give thanks for whatever seems to bring you fear and pain, so that you can use it to realize the truth of who you are. The truth of you has nothing to do with your positive attributes or with your perceived weaknesses. You are absolutely divine and perfect as you are. Anything that seems to differentiate you from another is simply a gift from Spirit to support you in the realizing of your divinity and to offer as a gift to others in realizing their divinity. It is not that you can help others because you are so evolved; rather you thank Spirit for what is given you, knowing that the receiving is always connected with the giving to others. If you accepted the fullness of God’s love, you would give it to others. If you allowed yourself to receive the fullness of God’s love, you would realize your ascension. We do call you ascended now, because this love is always coming to you, at every moment of every day. It is only a question of your willingness to receive it.

When you hold yourself as special, you are holding yourself separate from others and from God. You are unable to receive the fullness of God’s love. You may feel that you don’t deserve it or you might think you are so good that you don’t need God. That is what got you here in the first place. That is the oldest story. It is even older than the story that you are not worthy and God is going to punish you. It is the story that you don’t need God. It is the crazy idea that you can create on your own, separate from God. That is the ego’s voice. When you have stories of being good at something, you are listening to the ego’s story. It is the ego saying you don’t need God.

As you let go of this story that you are so smart and competent, you don’t replace it with being so dumb and helpless. That is the ego, too. The Holy Spirit simply says “I am”. And that’s it. Nothing else is the truth of you. Or, if you wish, “I am love” or “I am loved”. Anything else is there to separate you from others and from God, and you are guaranteed to stay in hell until you let there be only God.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

 

Does love require me to sacrifice?

There is a great confusion that intertwines love and sacrifice. It is this belief that if you love someone or something, you must make sacrifices for them or for it. This belief causes many problems. It is a confusion because love is of Spirit and sacrifice is of the ego. The ego believes that the only way to get something that you want is to give up something that you also want. We can call that a “win-lose” situation.

I want to begin with a short history of this perplexity. Most of you are familiar with the Judeo-Christian story, expressed both in the Old and the New Testaments. Let’s start with the Jewish Bible, the Old Testament. It is filled with sacrifice. God, or Yahweh, is constantly demanding something from the “chosen people”. Many are animal offerings, but in one particular story we have Abraham, the father of Judaism, being asked to sacrifice his beloved son, Isaac, who had come to him late in life as a reward for his devotion to the one god. Abraham was told to take Isaac up the mountain for this surrender. Reluctantly he agreed. Sacrifice for the love of god. God lets him off the hook at the last moment. The message, however, is that the proof of love is a willingness to make sacrifice. This is found carried forward into Christian belief. There the doctrine is that Jesus gave himself, that god sacrificed his only son, to free us from our sins. Love and sacrifice. I want to remind you that no such thing actually happened with Jesus. There was no sacrifice involved. This was a gift of love freely given from Jesus’s heart, following the loving voice of Spirit. If you want to hear the truest expression of Jesus’s teachings, I recommend A Course in Miracles. If you read the New Testament, I suggest that you limit yourself to the words attributed to Jesus, and still use your discernment (see last month’s message).

I want you to know that the god of the Old Testament, who for many is also the god of the New Testament, is really the ego. It is not God. God never asks for sacrifice. How could an all-powerful, all-creative, all-loving God ever have a need that could only be filled by human sacrifice? It makes no sense whatsoever. It is a crazy thought. Sacrifice is an attack, not an expression of love. When you sacrifice for another, what you are communicating is that that person is not divine. You are affirming their helplessness. Only by the sacrifice of your blood can they survive, be happy, and prosper. What a story! This is an attack. An attack on another is really an attack on yourself. How can someone else not be divine unless you also are not divine? Every sacrifice you make is an attack upon yourself.

You don’t usually offer blood sacrifices anymore, although patriotism may ask that you give your life for your country. While some believe in giving their life for their country, others believe that they must be willing to surrender all to help the oppressed of the world. This is not to suggest that to aid another is an attack. Only when the action is offered in the spirit of sacrifice is it an attack. When you do for another out of the love in your heart, out of divine inspiration, it is not an attack. This is something you truly desire to do. It doesn’t matter to you how it is received, whether there is gratitude. It is done out of your joy and freely given.

Look at your relationships, especially your committed relationships. In what ways do you feel that you have to deny yourself in order to maintain a relationship? Or even to have it to begin with? How many women deny their independence, career aspirations, or freedom in order to have a relationship? How many men feel tied down, denying themselves, not allowed to be “real men” anymore because of a relationship? When children come along the feeling of the necessity for sacrifice increases.

The place to begin is by recognizing that sacrifice is not an expression of love but is an attack. It is a byproduct of guilt. Your ego will tell you that you will lose everything if you do this. This voice will tell you that others are dependent upon your self-denial. Have the intention to stop making sacrifices. Ask Spirit to support you in strengthening your will to give up sacrificing and to always come from love. When the fear comes up – and it will – use the five-step process to help you transform it into love. When you are in a state of unconditional love you can clearly hear Spirit’s guidance.

When your ego is telling you that there are others out there depending upon your support, I want to remind you that it is all you. Everything that you see is you. If you perceive neediness that seems to require your sacrifice, that is your neediness. If someone tells you that if you really loved them, you would give them what they demand from you, it is your own ego that is speaking. How long will you believe that you have to thrash your own back in order to become pure enough for God? Sacrifice is self-flagellation. It is an attack upon yourself. This is why some people are terrified by love. The fear is that loving another will call you to a deep painful sacrifice. The only way to be free, in that case, is not to love. What a tangled web the ego weaves. Avoiding love will not bring an awareness of your divinity. If you stop sacrificing, instead committing to love and to transmuting fear into love, you will be able to hear Spirit directing you. This guidance will always lead you into love and out of sacrifice.

This is a great challenge. It is a fearful thing to give up sacrifice. The mass consciousness says that sacrifice might buy you redemption, might bring you forgiveness from God. But it doesn’t work that way. Sacrifice only keeps you separate from God, who requires nothing from you and offers you everything. God only asks you to be your true self. Set yourself free.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia 

Why doesn’t money feel spiritual to me?

Michael just pointed out to me that we have never directly addressed money in these messages. Ulla says that money seems to be a problem for everybody. It is funny that even though you have largely done away with physical money in your modern economic system, it remains just as big a problem. When we talk about illusion, what better place is there to look than at money? What value does that piece of paper have? You can’t eat it or drink it. You can’t build a house or take a trip with it. All you can do with it is give it away, or stow it away. Money is an absolute illusion; it has no value in and of itself. Even the coins that once were precious are now made mostly of low cost metals. You often replace money with a little worthless plastic card or even digital numbers in cyberspace. The thing to understand about money in all of its manifestations is that its primary purpose, as is true with absolutely everything else in your life, is to support you in realizing your divinity. You are immortal, divine beings. That is what you came here to realize.

Money is a tool to help you do just that. You may believe that the purpose of money is to help you survive, but your survival is guaranteed. Your ego may scream out that you don’t just want to survive, you want to survive and stay in your body. If you think that money is what allows you to stay in the body, and the ego uses the body to stay separate from God and in pain and suffering, then money must be the thing that keeps you trapped in your earthly hell. If we do away with money, can we eliminate pain and suffering? It is not quite that easy. Ask those who have tried to live outside the financial system.

Let us start with looking at the connection of fear with money, the anxiety that there isn’t enough. Money is the best way that you know to attract what you desire into your life. Whether you are looking at the basics of food, water, shelter, and clothing, or the extras that seem to make life worth living, there does not appear to be enough money. You may decide to sell yourself out. You may take a job that you probably wouldn’t do if fear were not raging in your mind. Some of you have mastered this denial process by finding work that provides some enjoyment and/or pays relatively well, but if you won the lottery, would you wish to continue with your job as it is? For many of you, your story is that your job takes too much time and energy, has too many distasteful qualities, and leaves you with too little money. The choice seems to be between either working harder or being poorer. There may be fear around deservedness, and poverty can be seen as the only route to heaven. Jesus warned us about the spiritual dangers of the love of money. When you place financial success as your most important goal in life, you have chosen a goal that has no value. If you believe that money will bring you happiness, you are deceiving yourself. No matter how much you create, it will not be enough. Which billionaires have said that they have enough and have stopped accumulating wealth (the answer may be those who are beginning to look at their own mortality)? But the deception is equal if you believe that poverty will bring you happiness. Remember that money is pure illusion. What do you value? If your priority in life is to experience your divinity, the purpose of money is to support that happening. Perhaps you wish to attend trainings or workshops, go to retreats, or receive sessions for your spiritual and physical healing. You don’t feel that you can afford them, so your spiritual growth feels blocked off. You can’t afford to ascend. That is quite a story.

We begin the healing of your relationship with money by reminding you that the dollar, kronor, or other currency is the illusion of all illusions. It is not real, but exists simply as a temporary convenience. It is a bridge. When you can fly, you don’t need bridges. Money provides an easy way to exchange. It releases you of the need for barter, where you must find the person who has what you want and also wants what you have. Money provides a basis for trust where you give service one place and receive service in another. Eventually there will be no need for it. Fear of lack requires you to keep score. As you realize that the supply is infinite, the need to keep track disappears. You don’t have to wait for the world to get there. You can go there at any time. You can go there now. You cannot experience your divinity while you are carrying fear about money. Is it possible for God to be unable to generate enough? Is there a limit to the creative power of God? If you believe that you cannot generate enough, you have separated yourself from God. You must not be divine. Part of my job is to shake you gently and remind you that you are divine. Listening to your ego is the only thing standing in the way of manifesting whatever you desire in the moment. You choose to pay attention to your ego instead of to Spirit. Your ego says you are undeserving and that there isn’t enough to go around. It tells you that wanting more is selfish and takes away from what others can have. It warns you about what God does to selfish people. The way to ascension, according to the ego, is to do without, to be an ascetic. On the flip side, the ego tells you that those who have abundance have sold their soul to the devil, and they will burn in hell forever. You will be rewarded for your suffering.

What a story! When you decide to stop listening to the ego, your experience will change. It probably won’t transform all at once, because it is difficult to stop listening to that lie instantly in its entirety. Ask Spirit to come in and guide you to the truth about money and manifestation. The function of money is as a medium of exchange so that you are supported in the moment as you are following your path or doing the service you came here to do. Money is not a diversion for you. You can be fully focused on love and supporting others to realize their divinity, as you realize your own. Do the work of listening to Spirit and letting go of the ego. Keep your eye on the prize. Whatever is essential for today will be there. There is no need to worry about tomorrow, because it never comes. You are always in the now. You are always supported by Spirit. When your fear about money surfaces, use the five-step process. Go right into the face of your fear. You will never be able to accumulate enough money to lose the fear. If you are working a job or staying in a relationship because of fear of money, fly into the face of that fear. Staying is a slow death that will not allow you the true happiness of realizing your divinity. If you want to do something that supports your purpose, but worry about not having enough – spend the money. Trust. Do the process. Remember that it is all illusion. It is just a movie. Play the role your heart is set on. God is on your side.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

How do my home and relationships affect my intention to ascend?

We talked several years ago about home and having a sense of home. I encourage you to reread that message, but we are going to talk a little differently about home today. We have also talked about relationships before. Again, you may wish to review that subject, but we will go in another direction with the information today. Finally, we previously talked about intention, and of course you are invited to revisit that correspondence – in fact, it would probably be the most supportive of the three in fully receiving today’s communication. We are going to weave these three topics together for you.

Everything always begins with intention. Everything. If you do not express clear intent, you, by default, give your life over to the mass consciousness and to the confusion brought forth from your past lives. When you have the goal to experience ascension, the only thing between you and the full realization of your divinity is the illusion of time. That could involve lifetimes, but it will happen. Much of what we share with you is given with the hope that you might reduce the time it takes you to realize your divinity. Knowing what you want, expressing intention, and making ascension the most important thing in your life – these are the great time reducers. Whatever else you are considering, choices you have before you, confusions you have – ask yourself, “Is this in line with my intention to ascend?”

I want to specifically direct this focus of achieving the realization of your divinity in two ways: first dealing with home, then with relationship. I have mentioned several times about the ”mirroring” effect of others. Whenever you are around others, you see yourself reflected in them. Whatever you notice about them shows how you feel about yourself. Your judgments of them are your judgments of yourself. Your love for them is your love for yourself. If you feel yourself to be a victim to them, it is you who have created the attack because of your belief in a need for punishment. As you are conscious of this, you can use it as a healing tool. Your ego does not want to accept these reflections as you. It wants to project on others and to be a righteous martyr. Take this home with you. Work with this within the safety and security of your home. These are frightful things you are encountering. It is a great challenge. It is not easy to fully confront your illusions and your fear, even using the five-step process. That’s why we encourage you to create a safe home. This is a place where you will have minimal opposition from your mirrors. You will never escape them completely, nor would you want to if your primary intention is to ascend. On the other hand, if you are constantly challenged by your reflections, you go crazy. It’s more than you can handle.  Create a secure place; I call that home. For some of you this home is the place where you live. But for others your residence is not a shelter. For some of you, home might be a group you get together with, a close friend, or a quiet spot in the woods. That is where you feel protected. The first thing we are suggesting around home is that you make sure you have it somewhere. If your residence doesn’t provide such a haven, find someplace else. Look for a space where you feel nurtured and supported in your spiritual process.

If you are in a relationship that doesn’t support your spiritual process in a nurturing manner, I ask you what your first priority is? What is your intention? If it is your chosen purpose to become aware of your divinity, living day-to-day intimately with someone who does not reinforce this path makes that realization much more difficult. If this is the case for you, perhaps you have created a safe pocket within your residence. But, still you must venture out into the rest of the house and interact with your partner. The questions are ” What are you choosing?” and “Why are you choosing that?” Perhaps your response is to say that you know that your partner is your mirror and so you are using your partner to promote your spiritual growth by taking responsibility when you become upset over what is going on between the two of you. I say that is wonderful, but do you need or want your life to be a constant barrage of perceived attack from your mirror? If you are open and willing to see your fears and what your ego is telling you, there will be plenty of opportunities to experience your ego’s voice as you go through your daily life. But, if you are ”sleeping with the enemy”, it can actually be harder to change your story.

Let’s talk further about relationships. Some of you, as you read this, are saying, ”What relationship? I wish I had one.” If this is your situation ask yourself which is more important to you, realizing your ascension or having a relationship. Be honest. If being in a relationship comes first, it is not likely that you will manifest one that supports your spirituality. You will also likely find the relationship to be a co-dependent one, because you may be entering it out of neediness. What other parts of yourself might you be willing to deny to keep your partner from leaving? If you decide to leave, you have to begin the whole process over again. What will make a new relationship any different? I encourage you to be conscious of what you are choosing. Ask yourself what you really want from a relationship. What would leave you unfulfilled if it were not a part of your partnership? If you have expressed your intention to realize your divinity, how can a relationship be fully supportive if it is not based on a mutual desire to experience your divine natures?

If ascension is your highest intention, you might be more strongly supported in it through creating a safe home for yourself, rather than focusing on having a relationship. If this leaves you feeling hopeless, your issue for healing is hopelessness. Create a network of friends or groups that share and support your intention. Choose a home where you can work with your process, deal with your ego, face your fears, and focus on loving yourself and others unconditionally, without having anyone in your face. Also, work with your fear of never finding the right partner. Come up with a new story. What likely happens is that you will create the partner who fully supports you in your ascension process when you don’t need that person, when you are already doing that for yourself. If you are looking for a partner to come in and save you in your spiritual process, you are back to a co-dependent situation. Ask Spirit to bring a supportive partner into your life. This partner can magnify the effort you are already making. Nobody ascends alone. We are all connected. You are never alone. When the person is ready, the partner will appear.

Your ultimate relationship is with yourself and with Spirit. Your process is expedited when you are clear about your intention, create a nurturing home, and are uncompromising when it comes to choosing a partner who supports your intention. I am not necessarily suggesting that if your relationship does not feel supportive, you should move out today or have the locks changed. But, it may be time to initiate a different kind of conversation with your partner. See if that mutuality can be found. If your partner is not able to support you – you have a clear choice to make. Remember that your truest partner is Spirit, and Spirit always loves you unconditionally.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia 

Why is it hard to let go of victimhood?

In the last message, we talked about recognizing your “old story” and choosing to let it go. But, you really have to want to let it go, and you don’t always want to do that. Sometimes, things have to get so bad that there isn’t anything else to do but to let the “old story” go. I am a believer in the idea that the least pain brings the greatest gain. You don’t have to really suffer to grow spiritually. If you are proactive and get out in front of things, you can choose to have your spiritual progress be as painless as possible. However, the part of you that we call the ego – the division that doesn’t believe in your divinity, thinks you are separate from God, and believes you are going to be punished for this separation – wants you to hold on to the victimization. It seems safer. Remember that the ego isn’t sane; it is absolutely crazy. It believes in insanity. And it draws immense pain and suffering to you.

I want to talk about how this operates for you. The ego says to fear punishment by God for being guilty. There is a hesitation to ever admit guilt. The ego tells you that to admit guilt is to invite the inevitable punishment. What you do then, is to project. Why is your life not working? Why are you upset today? Why are there problems? Because he did this. Because she did that. Because of the government. Because of my boss. Because of my parents. There is always a place to put blame. Unfortunately, blaming never helps. The ego claims it is buying time, that it is protecting you. But blaming never brings joy; it never brings peace or a sense of love. It creates feelings of helplessness. Blame leaves you always victim to the whims and the actions of others. Always. That is an illusion, because victimhood is a lie. It is not the truth. You are the creator. You are the divinity. Whatever exists comes from you, even if you are not aware of your part in the manifestation. As long as you pretend to not be responsible for your creations, they will continue to attack you. You will continue to fight them and to suffer.

I think that most of you can recognize yourself here. But some of you also play the game of ”Woe is me”. You tell yourself that you are so horrible and weak, and you go about accusing yourself instead of blaming others. However, if you look deeply, you will probably find many judgments of others mixed in with the self-blame. The ego thinks that by taking blame it might be able to avoid the wrath of God. But blaming yourself is the same thing as blaming others. It is an illusion; it is a lie. And, it never makes you feel better. It never heals. Remember that in the eyes of God there is no blame, no judgment, and no separation. God sees only your divine nature. For you to experience your divine nature, give up all blame and guilt, take full responsibility for everything in your life, and forgive yourself for every judgment you are holding about yourself and others. When you find the going to be tough, that is the place for the five-step process.

I began by saying that you are to be fully willing to give up your “old story”. There is a very good reason, according to the ego, for holding on to this blame/victim pattern. It manifests in a variety of ways, but they all have something in common. To the ego, it feels like there is a lot to lose by giving up victimhood. There is a comforting security blanket in being the helpless victim. This is something you can share with everyone around you. It is said that misery loves company. You go to your friends and you tell your pitiable story. ”Look what (fill in the name) did to me”. ”Guess what happened to me at (fill in the place)?”. ”You won’t believe what this jerk driver did”. It goes on and on, and your friend hugs you and says, ”Oh, poor you. I know how that feels”. You have this great connection and it feels good in the moment. It is a way to immediately sense love coming from others. They support you. This may be the only way that you know how to feel this love. The glow doesn’t last, however. The pain of being a victim remains. If you do decide to let go of your victimhood, there is a fear that others will abandon you. If you stop joining in the game of enabling victimhood, of supporting it in others and allowing others to support it in you, what is left in your relationships? Maybe others will grow angry and judgmental toward you? How will they react if you stop sharing your blame stories? What if you suggest to them that they give up their victimhood and claim their full power? ”Who the hell do you think you are?” they might say. There is a tremendous fear of taking your power. The ego judges power. It is terrified of it.

There is a similarity here with the experiences of those who choose to go to Alcoholics Anonymous. In that case, you want to give up an addiction to substances, as opposed to an addiction to blame. You may find that you will give up many of your friends and relationships, because they only share and support your addiction. You may choose to replace these people with others who are opting to take their own power. A great change may be required. Parents with younger children might have the fear that if they gave up their attachments, they might not be there for their kids. You might lose your marriage, your parents, or your job, along with your friends. You will become a social pariah. The ego does a wonderful job of spreading this kind of terror.

Ultimately it will come down to one question for you. Are you tired of this shit or not? Do you want to hold onto your victimhood and your unhappiness because you have the solace of fellow sufferers? Is that worth it? If the answer is ”yes”, you will continue with your “old story” until the answer becomes ”no”. If you want, now, to experience your divinity, feel your power, know only love, peace, and joy – you say “no” to the ego. You choose to let go of all judgment and blame, and refuse to have pain, suffering, and failure be part of your life anymore. Now, you are ready to let go of the “old stories”. You are willing to transform the fears you have been holding in your body into love. This will take some time, but the rewards will begin to be felt immediately. You don’t have to wait until life breaks you. You can be proactive. Choose to listen to the voice of love. You can experience the minimal amount of pain by choosing now. The more completely you commit yourself, the less pain you will feel. When you make this choice for yourself, ask for support from Spirit. It is there always. It always has been there. It has only been waiting for you to ask.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

What do you mean when you say I preplanned this life?

Let’s start today by talking about the truth of who you are. You are divine. You are one with God. You are the creator of all that is in the physical realm. This cannot be stated too many times. When you crossed the threshold and moved into the physical vessel of this body that you have created for your earthly experience, you forgot who you are. You think that you are less than divine and go on to prove yourself right. Just because you don’t believe in or can’t accept your godliness, you don’t stop being divine. You simply create from this stepped down point of view. You generate the illusion of limits throughout your life.

Let’s take a step back across the threshold, to a point before you created this incarnation. You now have a greater awareness of your divinity. Having been through this cycle of birth and death many times, and knowing how forgetful you become when you get back into a body, you try to design things to wake you up. You want to make yourself aware of the truth of who you are while you are in this next body. You hope to ascend. We call this preplanning. This is where you, along with those souls who have decided to incarnate with you and play significant roles in your life, make agreements.

It is helpful for you to take to heart and understand that the preplanned future events may look like disasters to you. Things may happen in your life that you would never consciously choose, such as accidents, death, loss of a love, or material setbacks. When you look at these events from the point of view which has forgotten your divinity, you might think that you are a victim of a random – or worse – cruel world. Why is this happening to me? Is God punishing me? The answer is that you planned it this way, that you are the god you have been railing against. You hoped these events would shake up your life so you could perceive yourself differently and begin to recognize your divine nature.

If everything in your life worked out well, you would be fairly content most of the time. You would be okay. If your parents were good enough, if you were relatively smart and healthy, if you had decent physical coordination and were attractive to others, if people liked you and you had plenty of friends, and if you were satisfied with your partner – you would be okay. If you had healthy, intelligent children who didn’t give you too much hell, a talent and job that you mostly enjoyed and which brought you a comfortable income, life would be okay; but spiritually, you might not grow at all. Why rock the boat? There is nothing wrong with such a life unless it is your desire to experience your true essence, not just ”good enough”. If you want to experience divinity and the absolute truth of who you are, and use your infinite individualized creativity to affect this earth plane and others in it, ”good enough” is not good enough. That is not what you came to do. You preplanned events and relationships to guide you in the ascension direction you wanted to follow, knowing that you would forget this course once you got into a body.

Look at your life now and find the one, or perhaps two or three, traumatic events that cause you to say to yourself that in no way did you choose this. Take responsibility for those events as you do in the third step of the five-step process. State that you chose this story, not to punish yourself, but out of love. This is recognition of your intention. While it is important to choose your new stories and to create the life you desire, it is equally important to realize that every story you already have comes from an intention. If you deny that intention, you deny a whole side of your divinity. Take these ”worst” events to your heart one at a time and do the five-step process with them. Feel where the story is held in your body and fully experience the energy until the Spiritual Alchemy does its work. Sometimes with these big stories, the energy is so powerful it feels like it doesn’t want to let go. This is a place where it can help to dialogue with the energy. Welcome it into your body. Thank it for being there. Acknowledge that you asked it to come. Tell it that you know it has a gift or a message for you and express your willingness to receive and to act on that guidance.

If your intention is to realize your ascension and get there in the most direct manner possible, embracing these events that seem the most challenging is the quickest way to go. Look the event in the face; tell it, ”I chose you. Thank you for being here. If it weren’t for you I wouldn’t be here asking to recognize my divinity.” When you can transform your greatest failure into your greatest success, anything is possible. And it is.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

How do violence and guilt relate to sexuality?

In the last message we spoke of spirituality and sexuality. There are two issues dealing with this subject that we would like to go into today. The first has to do with the coincidence of sexuality and violence. The second concerns undesired pregnancies. There is a connection between the two issues, but we will begin by looking at them separately. Deep within many of you there is a belief that sexual energy is not divine. To partake in sexuality is therefore to separate yourself from God, and, therefore, comes punishment somewhere down the line.

Violence is not an expression of sexuality. Sexuality is an energy that comes from the sharing of love. We wish to disconnect violence and sex in your brain-mind. Rape is violence; it is not sexual. It comes out of fear, not love. Love never requires another to do something that isn’t freely chosen. Fear can draw one to violate the freedom of another, or at least to attempt to, whether that violation is verbal, physical, or spiritual. Verbal and physical abuse are well understood. Spiritual abuse includes curses and spells, as well as the use of spiritual powers to encourage another to behave in a sexual way with you. As we have mentioned before, the development of spiritual powers is not always connected with love and spiritual maturity.

Let us again draw a line in the sand and say that when we are talking about rape or sexual violence we are not talking about sexuality. However, for many of you, particularly those who have chosen to incarnate in a feminine body, there is an emotional difficulty in separating these two – particularly if you have created the experience of apparent victimhood to sexual assault. Then you might find it difficult to have a sexual experience based in love, because the fear energy is still strongly held in your body. We want to remind you that when we talk about creating situations, it is never a statement of blame. If you are holding guilt or blame for the situation that happened, it is not our intention to support that. We wish to remind you of the absolute truth that you are the divine power in your life and that nothing could possibly happen without your permission. This does not mean that your intention or permission was consciously granted to the sexual violence that you have experienced or that you have fear of. You may wish to use the five-step process to feel this fear of sexual violence in your body, go into it and embrace this terror until it transforms to love; then visualize a new reality for yourself. This allows you to let go of victimhood and take your true power.

For some of you, your identification with victimhood is so much a part of who you believe yourself to be that you are unaware of having it. Here are some signs to look for. Do you feel something holding you back from sexual activity, aside from lack of interest in a particular possible partner? Do you find yourself having strong emotional reactions when watching films or television shows (or in reading novels or following true life stories) portraying sexual violence? Do you find yourself getting angry at the perpetrator or in judgment of the victim? “How could they let that happen?” ” How could they be so stupid?” If you do, your belief in your victimhood is active. If you have not created an ongoing fulfilling sexual relationship in your life, the fear energy is probably present, and likely not just from this incarnation but from many lifetimes. This is a major reason why lasting, loving relationships are not created. For others, the guilt creates a chain of violent partners.

Now let’s look at the male side of the equation. Here it is more likely that you have guilt about sexuality because you believe it is wrong. That begs the question for you, ”What woman would want to do that?” So, you either deny yourself sex or feel you have to trick or force the woman into the sexual experience. Tricking might mean making promises that you don’t intend to honor. Force, of course, means rape – which could mean emotional or mental force, as well as physical. All of this emerges out of the belief that you don’t deserve to have physical intimacy, so the only way to have it is through force. “What woman would want to have sex with you?” None, so you need to use some form of coercion. “And what kind of woman is going to have sex with you?” Only an evil woman, separated from God and spirituality would do that nasty thing with you. Now your use of force is somewhat justified. But what are your prospects for a lasting, supportive, loving committed relationship? “How can you commit to a relationship with a woman that you don’t respect?” If you do make love, you will be punished. Perhaps, she will control you and ruin your life in return for sex. Or, you can use the five-step process. For the woman, there may be the belief that there must be a relationship in order to have financial security. Sex can be seen as a price that has to be paid in order to have that support. Quite a story isn’t it! The good news is that you are both free. You don’t have to act out this story anymore. You can just let it go.

Before we leave for today, let’s talk about the subject of unwanted pregnancy, which affects both of you – although the woman has a larger role. For the man, the fear is likely to be that the pregnancy is going to rope you into the relationship and you may have to make a commitment. Even if there is already a child or two, the noose is being tightened and the responsibilities and restrictions are increasing. Unwanted pregnancy is the consequence you knew was coming from having sex. The extreme in the mass consciousness tells you that the only excuse for sex is reproduction and that you must live with your sinful choices and have the baby. Even if those religious structures don’t exist for you, it is likely that you believe that you have no control over pregnancy, short of abstinence. Most forms of artificial birth control carry with them some danger from side effects. Guilt is there with or without religion. The purest form of birth control is to love yourself unconditionally and to process all of your sexual guilt through the five-step process. Choose conception consciously. This is a big step. In the meantime, take prudent precautions until you are clear that you have released the fear and judgment from your body. Affirmations alone will not do that. Don’t come back to me and say, “Sanhia, you told me I wouldn’t get pregnant unless I wanted to”.  If you do create an undesired pregnancy, there is no right or wrong choice. You will learn and grow from either. The potential child is an immortal soul (and old buddy) who has agreed to play this role for you. Either way, that soul will continue.

The five-step process is a very powerful and effective tool. But, that does not mean that it is necessarily easy for an individual to succeed at it the first time she tries. Some of you have more innate skill in doing the process by yourself. For many, it may be helpful for somebody to guide you, somebody in whom you have confidence. You may also use the recording found on the website. It all comes down to you and to your intention. The tools are there to use. If you prefer the support of another, create that. Find a partner and support each other. There is always a way. It is the strength of your intention that makes the difference. We love you. We wish you to have a wonderful experience in physicality and to free yourself from all the fears of sexuality so that you may enjoy it ecstatically.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

Are you afraid of the dark?

For those of you in the northern hemisphere, when you have passed the darkest day of the year and have several months of winter weather to look forward to, do you dislike these months? Do you have an aversion to the shorter days, the colder temperatures, the snow or cold rain? Are you already looking forward to spring? I could spend this time speaking of being present, loving what is in front of you, and making the most of each day. Those are all ascension focused points of view, but there is something else I would like to zero in on today. It is a good time to examine your fear and judgment of the dark.

Let’s start with the fear of the dark. Do you experience anxiety being in dark places? Are you fearful walking down a dark street or road by yourself? And what about being in the woods alone at night? What is this fear of darkness all about? Your childhood was filled with horror stories that mostly took place after dark. You don’t worry about monsters under your bed in the middle of the afternoon. To look at what the dark represents, in fact, what it actually is – look at the dualism that makes material existence possible. The first division in the biblical creation story was between the light and the dark. The light was declared as good, so where does that leave the dark? Light represents the masculine, idealistic, mental energy. The dark represents the feminine, realistic, emotional energy. The fear of the dark is the judgment you have for your physical-ness, and for feminine energy. Keep in mind that you all contain both feminine and masculine energy in some balance.

How prevalent is the vilification of the dark in today’s mythology? Think of Star WarsBatman, and The Lord of the Rings. Everyone is always fighting the dark forces, sometimes sparring with their own inner darkness. The yin-yang symbol is not one of combat but of the intertwining and juxtaposition of energies. You did not create your bodies in order to fear them, but rather to learn to love them unconditionally as you use them to realize your ascension. Ascension does not occur by choosing the light over the dark. Such a choice leaves you hanging on the wheel of reincarnation. If you choose to love the light and to hate the dark, earth becomes your personal hell. Then, you can’t wait for the opportunity to leave your body. Leave if you wish. You don’t have to stay in the physical. But, if you choose to stay, why not love your visit? Why not embrace the dark along with the light? You can start this winter. Heal your fear of the dark, of the physical, of the feminine. Give up your judgment of darkness.

The first thing you might try doing is to use the five-step process. This is a powerful and effective way to change your story; and your fear of the dark side is a major part of your story. If you are having any difficulty leading yourself through the five steps, perhaps you can find a trusted friend with whom you can take turns being the guide, so that you can each have a time to simply relax and be led. You can also listen to the recording. This is big. This touches on all relationship issues, especially those involving your sexuality. It is not possible to maintain a deep physical relationship without loving the body. This impacts all health issues and all money/survival concerns. Dis-ease comes out of fear or out of hatred of the physical body. If you dislike the physical, you may have difficulty manifesting your material support. This connects with all mental health issues, especially depression, which becomes a bigger issue for many of you at this time of the year. It is not possible for you to unconditionally love yourself if you fear and judge half of who you are. Spend more time in the dark. Don’t rush to fill all your evenings with lights and electronic distractions. Try a little candlelight, or a fire and meditation, a book, or quiet conversation. Try taking some walks in the dark.

It is time to look straight into the dark. Face your fears. See the dark for what it is: a perfect part of the universal, unconditionally loving creator and creation. Notice that all the ascension stories include the ”dark night”, where the prophet has to confront his deepest fears. There is no path around it. The only way out is straight through the heart of darkness. There is only love waiting there. Everything else is illusion. Darkness is love just as light is love. Have your own private marriage ceremony between them this winter. You deserve love all of the time. May the darkness be with you.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia