Why is it so hard for me to forgive?
It may seem that forgiveness is a common topic in these messages. That is true. It is true because there is probably no single concept that is of greater importance than that of forgiveness. If you wish to realize your ascension, it is absolutely central that you learn to forgive fully and completely. Without forgiveness, it is difficult to experience unconditional love. To try to love without forgiving first, is putting the cart before the horse. Forgiveness is what drives your realization of your ascension. The most efficient use of your energies is to figure out how to truly forgive. That’s where we are going today.
One of the reasons that forgiveness is difficult for you is that you may understand it to be something that is bestowed upon another because they have done something that requires forgiving. Whatever act that they have committed, you recognize it as a crime. You decide that it needs to be forgiven because otherwise you are stuck in this ego cycle. If you are a “good” person you will learn how to forgive them. What actually happens is that in this process you ever so subtly (or perhaps not so subtly) suggest that you are better than the offender. You will be the bigger person and forgive them for being such an idiot. I exaggerate to provide a little humor, but this is precisely how the attempt at forgiveness often takes place. You are still holding on to the judgment when you try to forgive in this manner. If you look deeply within, you will find that the forgiveness has never really taken place. Your belief is that the person has done wrong and needs forgiveness. No matter how much forgiving you do, that person still has done wrong. This misunderstanding is why forgiveness is so difficult.
The first step in true forgiveness is to acknowledge that nothing wrong has been done. To repeat, nothing wrong has been done. The judgment that a wrong has been committed needs to be released. The truth is that the other person didn’t do anything. If they had done something real, something that could truly hurt another, the victim would be hurt forever and ever, for eternity. Nobody has the power to do such a thing. The truth of all human souls is that they are Divine children of God and exist forever. Nothing Divine can be hurt. Only something that is not real can be damaged. Whatever it is that you are judging in this other person did not really happen. To repeat, it did not happen. Nothing real can be hurt. When you judge someone for the action you perceive them doing, it is no different than judging them for their previous night’s dream. There you can recognize that nothing really happened. It is the same in your “waking” world. The action that you have judged didn’t really happen, nobody was really injured. Nothing real, nothing Divine, can be hurt. You will wake up from this physical illusion too, some day. So, this is your job. You don’t forgive another for what they have done because you are a good person, above them and better – so that you are able to forgive. Rather, you realize that there is absolutely nothing to forgive.
Let’s look at it from another perspective. We talked several messages ago about how you define yourself. How many of you define yourself, in part, by what other people say to you or about you? Nothing that can change is real. Nobody can hurt anyone else. How could spoken words have any effect upon you? You are Divine. How can the illusion affect reality? It is time to turn this around. Nobody does anything to you. No one. There is nothing to forgive because no one does anything to you. This illusion is all your creation. You have created other people in your physical life. In this illusion of being human, you “hire” others to say and do things to you. Imagine that you have written a script. You hand it your friend and ask them to read it to you. It says horrible things about you. They ask if you are serious about having them read it out loud. You tell them to go ahead. They tell you how horrible you are. Then you get upset. You feel bad about yourself and are not happy with them. Pretty silly, huh? That’s exactly how it happens.
You are getting a two for one today. First, you are realizing that there is never really anything to forgive in anyone else. The second is to realize that whatever anybody does to you has come from your instruction. It is the only way it can be. They are telling you the judgment you have about yourself. They are telling you what you have not forgiven yourself for, the illusion that you believe to be true. As long as you pretend that it is them and not you that is the source of this information, you are stuck in a pattern of having to be superior to them for the harm they have done. As you accept that you are the source of everything that is not Divine, you realize that you have made up this whole fairy tale, this whole story. The forgiveness called for is of self. If you think that you have been wrong to think or act as you have, does this mean you now have to be better than yourself and forgive? How can you do that? You might believe that you can be better than another, but how can you be a better person than yourself? That gets pretty tricky. Now is the time to realize that this is all absolutely crazy, that there is nothing to forgive.
You have been projecting your beliefs upon God. You have created an unforgiving God. Now it gets even trickier. If God is really the one judging you, and you want to forgive, you have to be better than God. Then you can forgive yourself, which God obviously can’t do. This is the insanity of the ego. When you look at it in black and white (as you are doing now), it’s a pretty funny story. It’s really humorous. Close your eyes and feel the enormous freedom that comes from absolute forgiveness. This is not the forgiveness of your sins, but the forgiveness that says there is no sin. There never has been sin. You have always been loved unconditionally. There is nothing you ever could have done or ever could do to change that. Nobody is defining you as in need of forgiveness but you. You do not have to grovel before God begging forgiveness. Only you are holding the judgmental picture of yourself. Let it go. No amount of pleading will ever buy you forgiveness. No amount of atonement, no penance, will ever be enough. You cannot perform community service for God. You cannot make up for what never was and never will be. Such actions can only keep you in the cycle of judgment and fear. Forgiveness is only made easy when you know there is no need for it. Anyone can do it. No special skill is needed. You don’t have to be better than anybody else. There is nothing to do. Be like God.