How can I be a better parent?

In the last message we talked about the relationship you had with your parents, about taking responsibility for all that happened and forgiving them and yourself. If you have not taken these steps, you will likely find yourself repeating your childhood with your own children. For those of you who do not have children, this projection will take place with others for whom you act as an authority figure, though the impact is usually stronger and more focused with your own children.

Many people have very idealistic thoughts about their children and how they will raise them. You tell yourself you are not going to be like your mother or your father; you will bring them up in a different way. You may consider the best techniques to use with your offspring so that they don’t have to go through what you had to endure. The truth is that if you haven’t healed with your parents, you will find yourself becoming your parents as you are in the midst of bringing up your children. They will constantly frustrate you. It hardly seems fair – first your parents controlled and hindered you, and now your children are doing the same thing. What kind of world is this? The illusion, again, is that you have the responsibility as a parent to turn out the perfect child, when in actuality it doesn’t matter what you do as a parent. It truly doesn’t. This does not mean that I am encouraging you to beat or sexually abuse your children, but it doesn’t make a difference for them. It does make a difference for you. Whatever you send out to another is what you believe that you deserve, and will therefore receive. However, the truth of them is not harmed. If that is what they seem to receive from you, it is their creation. They will deal with it however they deal with it, as you did with your parents.

Your children came in with their egos fully formed and are creating what they need to have in their classroom to help them wake up to their Divinity. They chose you as their parent. Your basic job is to see that they survive childhood – to see that they are fed, clothed, housed, physically protected, and adequately educated. It is not your job to make sure they excel as students or have perfect behavior, whatever that might be. If they survive childhood, you have done a wonderful job. Even if they don’t, you have done the best you could. If you manage not to project your fears upon them, that is just gravy. Again, your children are the creators of their experience, not you. You are just a tool. If you want to do more than the basics and provide some of that gravy, the best way of doing that is to heal with your parents. Remember, if you still hold yourself as being a victim to your parents, you will create being a victim to your children. You will perceive your children as victims, too. You will worry about them, about what the world is doing to them. You will judge them for their weaknesses and fear for their future. In short, you will treat them as you treat yourself.

What you teach your children does not come from your words, but from your example. If you are coming from unconditional love, they will receive that no matter what your words or actions might be. They always have the choice to reject or misinterpret you, but loving them anyway gives them more space to choose love themselves. If through your living example your children are shown that you are never a victim to anything, you could not do more as a parent. Of course, this includes not being a victim to being a parent. If your children get the message of the parental role being one of martyrdom – that you have had to make so many sacrifices in order to be a good parent – you have put an enormous guilt load on your their shoulders. That’s okay; it was a lesson they apparently needed to deal with, but it leaves you feeling a failure, feeling defeated.

But this message is not about your children, it is about you. Where you have judgment about your children and want to change them – that is the place you are not accepting yourself. Thank your children for being your teachers. Herein lies the crux of this message. There is no true hierarchy among you and your children. You, they, and everyone else are just human. You are all Divinity pretending not to be Divine, trying to wake up. Just because your child is in a smaller, more physically vulnerable body – as you were once upon a time – does not mean they are not your peer. Yes, it is your role to help them survive to adulthood, not because you are more evolved, but simply because you are physically mature. So thank your children for being your teachers, and learn from them. Seek the place where you have no judgment.

One of the biggest confusions that a parent can act on is to demand some kind of love from their children. When you demand love from anybody else, silently or overtly, it comes from a place of not loving yourself. You have denied yourself God’s love, even though it is always there. You have separated yourself from it, pretending it is not there. You seek human love to replace Divine love, but that can never work. When you don’t believe that God loves you unconditionally, you create the world from that mindset. You are unlovable. It is not possible for anyone to fill that void, least of all your children. How can they love you when they are dependent on you? It is hard to truly love your boss or the policeman who just pulled you over?

Another thing that happens in the relationship between children and parents is brought about by your desire to create heaven on earth. The dream is that you will create this heavenly family where you can finally find love and feel needed.  In addition you will release these wonderful, perfect children into the world who will make such a difference, or at least have the level of success that you never reached. You are a wonderful parent and they are wonderful children. If you now have adult children or – god forbid – teenagers (just kidding), you know what has happened to that dream. How much fear do you have for your child or your adult child? What concerns do you have about their choices? Where do you see them as helpless victims of other people or the world? When you worry about your children, you aren’t seeing their Divinity. You are not seeing the perfection of the lessons they are drawing into their classroom as they attempt to awaken from the dream. This has nothing to do with your children. They are simply your projection of your inner fears and separation from God. Own all of that. It does not matter what you or your children accomplish on the earth plane. Heal yourself. Set your children free to find their own Divinity. Again, the best support you can provide them with is your own self-healing.

Your role as parent ends when your children leave home. It was probably over long before that, but now it is impossible to ignore. You succeeded. They survived childhood. If you ignored your own needs in order to be a parent, you can stop that now. Take care of yourself. This is much easier to do if you have also given up the role of being a child to your parents. If you haven’t, if they still run your life through the power you give them in your mind, it is never too late to reverse that. Free yourself from your parents as you set your children free. Your primary relationship is now with Spirit. Your children and your parents are all peers, siblings, as you heal the rift with your true parent, with God. Your job is to see all your family members through the eyes of Jesus, to see them as perfect, innocent, unconditionally loved Children of God. This is the true relationship between parent and child.

When the relationship with your parents is not healed and there is frustration with your children, you will probably experience your marriage as less than ideal, also. All these relationships are being created by the same unhealed mind. You might make the decision to stay together for the children, fearing that they would be badly damaged by a divorce. It is not my job to tell you whether you should stay or leave; you must trust your own guidance to make that call. However, if you blame your partner for the problems in the marriage and leave, you will likely go out and create the same problems in another relationship. Don’t confuse cause and effect. Your mind is the creator of all your experiences, so that is what needs changing. However, if you put on a front for the children and stay together for their sake, it will be another example of telling them one thing and then doing another. They will know, at least on an unconscious level. This will not give them support in navigating relationships on their own as adults. Yes, this will be their creation, but don’t fool yourself into believing that you help your children by living a lie. Be honest with your children that you are having difficulties in the marriage and that they have nothing to do with them. Tell them that you are doing your best to sort things out. In that awareness, you still may realize that you and your partner’s goals are so different that a change to a relationship with greater alignment is desired. If you are unable to solve the marital problems, let your children know, without putting them in the center of the situation, and separate. If you find that you are not able to create an amicable split with your partner, you are not a victim. Whatever you do, try not to ever put the children in the center of your marriage/divorce. Don’t try to get them on your side or set them against your partner. This is not appropriate. It can never serve the child. A child is not ready to be your adult friend. Your relationship with your spouse is about you, don’t project it anywhere else. Take responsibility.

As you can see, this subject of parents and children is enormous. Humans learn through relationships more than anywhere else because of the nature of projection and the fear and difficulty connected with looking at the self honestly.  No relationship is more fraught with confusing entanglements than that of parent and child. Therefore, no relationship provides more fertile soil for spiritual growth. Fortunately, as with all relationships, you don’t need their presence or their cooperation to heal. What is your creation can be totally balanced by you alone, of course with the support of Spirit. Don’t be shy about asking for that help. You are a Divine child and a Divine parent.

Good Now

Sanhia

How can we not see children as innocent victims?

It’s a funny thing, but I have never talked to a human who didn’t have parents. Sometimes, one might not know who his birth mother was; there was an adoption and the mother’s identity is hidden. In this case there are two mothers that you have stories with, one that abandoned you and one that you can have the everyday issues with. Even if there are no identifiable mothers, you will have numerous tales with foster parents, relatives, or orphanages, along with the actual birth mother relationship. There is always a father, also, even if the mother doesn’t know who it is. Present or absent, which is of course its own drama, you have a history with him along with any other men who have played that role for you. Within the illusion, everyone has two parents, and many stories come with those relationships. An interesting thing about the parent-child relationship is that it is a lifelong one. Most relationships are for a short period – perhaps only a one time meeting, or for a length of time – but only a few traverse your whole life. The relationship with a parent is carried deep within you, particularly if you haven’t taken full responsibility for it. This is true even if there has been a separation, whether through death or from personal choice. The relationship is a constant presence. If there were an order of importance of relationships in the illusion, these might be the biggest ones. Many of you, if you are honest with yourselves, blame your parents for one thing or another. You believe you are the way you are because your father was so cruel or because your mother was so judgmental. So, you are a victim all of your life because of whom your parents were. This is not true. That is the ego’s story. It is another way of confusing cause and effect.

The mass consciousness presents the illusion that a pure, innocent, helpless baby is born. The child is a blank screen onto which the parents will begin to write. Such a responsibility! If they do things right, the child will thrive; if they do things wrong, the child will suffer. What a burden! Fortunately it is an illusion. Children hardly come in as blank slates; they arrive fully formed. Of course we are not speaking physically, but as we know the physical you is not the true you. Physically, infants are helpless, but mentally they carry with them all of the ego beliefs of guilt, fear, and victimhood they have burdened themselves with through countless incarnations since their imagined separation from God. What happens is that children create experiences in the world just as you do as an adult. From the first day onward, and even before that in their prenatal experiences, children create in accordance with these beliefs. Like you, they project their guilt onto others and receive punishments they believe they deserve, which will hopefully square them in God’s eye. Now they have others, particularly their parents, who they can blame and point a finger at. You all did this, and you are still doing it.

I want to talk about this from a few different perspectives – firstly from your specific relationship with your parents. As you were growing up it certainly seemed that you had no choice. You couldn’t pick up and leave or select different parents. You couldn’t avoid abusive situations at school, in your neighborhood, or with relatives. You felt yourself to be a victim. You simply had to endure these experiences. But then, as now, you always had the ability to say that the outer world did not affect you. In some places you made this choice and your parents’ words and deeds did not touch you. You knew they were not the truth. You created your own truth in these situations. If you are not an only child, you see how your siblings developed differently – none of you are alike. If you were blank slates written on by the same parents, you should have turned out the same. Yet, you and your siblings are quite different. Why? Because you each created your own experiences and made your own choices in dealing with them. It was not so much a question of what happened to you as how you dealt with it internally. Did you practice forgiveness and seeing the Divinity in your parent, or were those skills yet to be developed? The potential was there to access those truths. This is not to point a finger or to say that it was your fault that you were not more aware, but simply to shine light on the reality of the situation. You came to wake up and Spirit provided you from birth on with the opportunities to do just that. You came in believing in your victimhood and you proved yourself right.

At some point you left home. Now you are on your own. Your parents are no longer in your day-to-day life. Yet, in how many ways are they still running it? What judgments did they make about you that you took on as your own? What fears did they instill in you that follow you around even when your parents’ physical presence doesn’t? Unless you do a forgiveness process, your parents will continue forever to run your life, even though you have been an independent adult for years. If you tell yourself that you are over all of that, that you are an adult and your own person now –wonderful! But take a good look at each of your parents and notice where you have any judgment remaining about them, or about the way they raised you – or about things they are still doing today. Where you find judgments you are discovering the places where they still run your life. This is projection, a confusion of cause and effect. You are always the cause of everything that happens to you. The world is always the effect. This is true now; it was true when you were a child. Your judgments of your parents are a refusal to admit the truth. It is time to grow up. Stop being a helpless child. If you were not really a victim then, you are even less so now. Be an adult and take responsibility. It is yourself you are judging. Handle it. You know how to do that – kindly, gently, lovingly, but firmly. There is no kindness to your parents or to yourself in projection and blame. They are attacks. Blame is a statement that you are a helpless victim. You pretend that you didn’t choose these parents, but you did. You may scream that you didn’t ask to be born, but you did. You created the perfect parents for you, the best classroom for you to learn the lessons you came to master so that you could awaken – leaving the pain, the guilt, the suffering, and the belief in separation from God that are a part of the world of duality – and come home. You chose the perfect parents to support you in doing that. Their job ended years ago. It’s over, complete. Now the only work left to be done is yours.

Until you do this work, you will recreate your parents in all of the authority figures you meet in your life. It might be your boss and it certainly will be your partner. If you have not forgiven your opposite sex parent, you will find yourself married to that parent. It will make no difference what your spouse does; you will perceive them acting as your parent did. Remember that it is all you. There is no other. You are the creator of everyone in your life. You will create your mother and father everywhere you go. Make it simple for yourself. Rather than dealing with challenges with every person you meet every day of your life, just heal with your parents. Give gratitude to Spirit and to them for playing this game with you, for being your teachers. Look where you have judgment. Let Spirit lift that and help you to forgive. Ask for gratitude for having these perfect parents who came into your life to teach you exactly the lessons you came to learn. If you are not certain what the lessons were, request to understand what you came to learn from your parents.

In conclusion, you are all children. When you were a physical child it seemed that your parents were on another level. They certainly had the physical power. In truth, you were all children, asleep and hoping to awaken to your true selves. You and your parents are siblings, as is your brother Jesus. Your only job is to love them and to love yourself, to forgive them and to forgive yourself. To enter the kingdom of God you become like a child: innocent, pure, forgiven – the very idea that the mass consciousness holds of the newborn. Become the child you never got to be in this body. You are the Child of God.

Good Now

Sanhia

Is it part of my purpose to help heal others?

As you are working with your spiritual process, with realizing your Divinity, with noticing you are listening to a voice, with learning to discern whether it is Spirit or the ego you are listening to, and with learning to hear, trust, and follow Spirit – as you are doing all of these things and you look around at your friends, relatives, co-workers, and perhaps even strangers – you notice that they are making what seems to you to be wrong choices. They may seem to be acting in ways that bring them pain and confusion as they listen to the ego and make the illusion real. A very natural reaction you may likely have is to say to yourself, “Oh, if they only knew what they were doing!” You think that perhaps you can be of help to them. You could point out how they are listening to the ego, how what they are seeing isn’t real, how their choices cannot work out for them. You may wonder if that is part of your path. As you are gaining wisdom, should you be sharing it with those around you? My answer to this is a very simple and clear “No”. That is not your job. That is my job. That is Spirit’s job. It is not your job. Perhaps that is not what you wanted to hear. Or maybe you are letting go a sigh of relief.

Let me explain why healing others is not your job. There are myriad reasons, so I will wander about and touch on this and that. I will begin by reminding that when you want to intercede when observing another in pain – what you are seeing is you. This is where the voice of the ego in you likely goes crazy and says, “No! That is them.” No, this is your creation. Do not confuse the cause and the effect. Whatever you see in the world is your creation. Everything is created by your mind. You are not a disconnected observer. What you see is born in your mind, not in the world. So, everything in the world is your mirror. When you see another choosing ego, it is you choosing ego. The work, then, is not to fix them, but to heal yourself. Your only job, your only purpose for being here, is to heal yourself. You have no responsibility for dealing with what you perceive as others’ challenges or problems.

Now, your mind may be asking, “But, what if they ask me for help?” That is a different question. Any requests you receive for support are to be given to Spirit. Allow Spirit to speak through you. Trust what comes and share it with the one who has requested support. Then, let it go. Have no attachment to it being heard, received, or acted on in the “right” way. That is none of your business. Your only job is to share what Spirit gives to you and let it go.

When you perceive that another has a challenge or might not be choosing in the highest way, what is truly going on is that you are judging them. This can feel like a thin line, discerning what is noticing and what is judging. If any kind of emotional reaction is present, know that judgment is involved. This can include positive as well as negative emotions. Let’s take it a step further. The truth of the other is that they are Divine, as are you. Any lack you perceive in them is an expression of denial of their Divinity. Thus, you are saying that you, also, are not really Divine. A good rule of thumb to use when looking at others is that if you cannot make your perception true for all others, it is not true. To judge one person for something you do not judge another for is to create separation. When you separate any son of God from another, you separate yourself from God. You could, instead, think in the following fashion. When you observe someone acting from the ego, you can say that they are not fully awake yet. That is true of all who are in the human condition, including yourself. To single out one individual as separate from God, while holding another as special or connected to God, creates the illusion of separation and cannot be a true observation. God is unity and Oneness. Any differences come from separation and the ego. As soon as you label any one person as out of balance, you have separated yourself from them and from God. In truth, of course, you are never separate from God, but this is your human experience.

If you wish to realize the truth of your Oneness with God and to let go of this physical illusion, don’t ever take on the cloak of the wise teacher, of being the healer. That is not your job. That, again, does not mean that Spirit may not use you, but it is for Spirit to decide. In truth, you cannot help but to teach what you have learned, but you will do this through your surrender to Spirit. Your job is not to teach, but to learn. If you are in doubt whether the words you receive are coming from Spirit, say nothing. The same words can come from the voice of ego or Spirit. What matters is if pure love is behind them. If you are unsure whether it is your ego or the voice of Spirit wishing to express, err on the side of discernment and caution. Give your doubt and confusion to Spirit. Continue to give to Spirit all of your perceptions of pain or fear or doubt or victimization or victimizing that you see expressed through others. Your task is to love them unconditionally and see yourself as one with them. If that is too great a challenge in the moment, it is no biggie. Give it to Spirit. You are the one crying out for help. When you turn the situation over to Spirit, you don’t tell Him how you want things handled. If you have any expectations about results, you have not let go, have not truly given it to Spirit. Remember that thinking you knew better than God is what got you here in the first place. Maybe Spirit has a message for you to share, maybe not. It is not your business. It does not matter what is going on in the world. That is effect not cause.

Your business is to heal your separation. You do this through forgiveness and reminding yourself of your innocence, not by noticing the log in your neighbor’s eye. Your healing will never be realized through projection. Own everything you see as yours; ask Spirit to help you forgive yourself and open to God’s love. You become frantic to heal the other, because you are frantic to heal yourself. When you try to heal the shadow rather than changing the projector you cannot succeed. At best, you end up with good slapstick comedy. Remember that it is never about the form. It is never about what appears to you to be going on in the world. It is always about the content of your mind. Is your focus on the truth of your Divinity, your innocence, on you being unconditionally loved by God – or – is it on your fear and guilt, on the belief that you have been kicked out of heaven, on trying to please God? It is never about fixing the world. It is not about saying the right words at the right time to the right person. None of that matters. Yes, Spirit will use humans in the process of ending the illusion, but it never matters when or how. The end is already certain. It was decided before any present perception, words, or actions transpire. When you speak with the influence of the ego there will be a shadow of judgment in your voice or an attachment to the end result. You may feel the listener must follow your advice to a successful conclusion or you have both failed. When influenced by Spirit you may never know why He has used you, what the purpose is. Let go of any need to know.

Your job is not to do “good”. Good is one half of the duality and we all know what the other half is. One cannot exist without the other. Love does not recognize good or evil. It shines on all until everything is dissolved but truth. The reason you want to heal another is your desire to be rewarded by God. God may then single you out for redemption because you are better than another. How fortunate that you noticed their failure so that you can help them because you are better than them. Look God! No hands! Your imagined redemption comes only after you see your absolute equality with every Son of God. God doesn’t need your help. Let go of thinking you have a better way. Be humble. Give up your need to be an individual, to stand out, to be better. Just be. Instead of healing another, simply be kind to them; be loving. That’s what God does. No matter how many times you fall on your face, you are loved beyond measure. No matter what you do or feel or say…

God Blesses You

Sanhia

Do I have to be perfect to ascend?

We have been covering a lot of territory in the past few messages, talking about pure non-duality, confusing cause and effect, accepting everything that comes to you, and the impossibility of creating heaven on earth. Sometimes, and it is perfectly understandable, you might have the reaction that this is all too much. On a conceptual level you might believe in what I have shared; that you are creating it all, that none of it is real, to forgive yourself for everything that has happened and to not judge anyone, and, and, and…… You might be thinking “But Sanhia, it feels enormous. It feels so big. I don’t think I’m up to it. I don’t think I can do all of this. How could anyone accomplish such a feat? You would have to be perfect.” Wow! That was quite a rant. Is there anything more? Don’t hold back. Excuse me while I chuckle just a bit, not at you but with you. You are absolutely right. It is too much. It is too big. Fortunately, you are not expected to be perfect. In the illusion in duality, it is an absolute impossibility. You cannot go through your day and not have a negative emotional response, not get angry, not blame someone, or feel like a victim. It’s going to happen. It is the human condition. If it did not happen, you would not be here in a body; you would be finished with all of this.

Maybe, you notice that these reactions are not happening as often as they once did. Think about how it was before you begin working with non-dualistic thinking. Over time, this change in how you react to the world will increase in its occurrence. But, you will never realize a time where the ego’s thoughts don’t grab a hold of you. If you have it in your mind that your ascension can only come about through perfection, that day is never going to come. There will never be a time where your ego is absolutely unable to get a foot in the door, or even a toe. Hearing this may bring on a wave of sadness or hopelessness for you. You may feel that you can never make it. That is not the case; it is but an opening for the ego’s voice.  In fact, the opposite is true. You are going to make it; you have no choice. We are in charge of that, not you. You can slow the process down by digging in your heals and refusing to listen to Spirit, by insisting on being a victim and projecting your guilt on others. You can do that and slow things down, but you can’t stop it. So, if you can do your worst and are still guaranteed your place in heaven with God, where in fact you truly are right now though lacking the awareness of being there, how much more quickly are you going to realize your Oneness with God if you are trying to work with the process instead of against it?

The secret is not in being perfect in every moment. The secret is in becoming aware after you have let the ego run rampant, that you have done so. With this awareness there are two steps to take. First, give whatever it is to Spirit. Don’t tell Spirit what to do; this is not yours to handle. Just let it go and let Spirit handle it. The second step is equally important. Be kind to yourself. Let it be okay that you did what you did, or that you didn’t do what you didn’t do. Let that be okay. It is not the expectation that you will never stumble. There is no thought about that. There is no judgment. Remember that nothing here is real. Nothing you do is wrong. Nobody is hurt, not even yourself. It is all an illusion. That is the forgiveness process, so be kind to yourself and forgive yourself. It is perfectly okay that you listened to the ego. The important thing is that you noticed and have chosen to try not to do that next time. You might still do it again. No biggie. What is important is that you notice, even if it takes days to do so. It makes no difference how long it takes you to notice. Time doesn’t matter, except when you are in pain. Holding on to your blame and victimhood is always painful…well, after the initial rush that comes from feeling yourself to be a righteous martyr. As soon as you realize that you have projected, that you have confused the cause and the effect, the pain eases. This is an enormous accomplishment, the noticing that you have been listening to ego and now want to give it to Spirit. Nobody is counting how many times you trip, except yourself. So stop counting; be kind to yourself.

Let go of seeking perfection. You are already perfect. You are perfection pretending to not be perfect. As long as you are in a body, that dance will go on…..it will for all humanity. You cannot be perfect in duality, because in duality there are always opposites. You cannot help listening to ego in some moments, and you are not judged for that or for anything else. So give it to Spirit and be kind to yourself. I want to remind you that as you are looking for perfection, you can be looking in all the wrong places. Perfection is not found in the world, which will never mirror heaven, which will never replicate the infinite love of God. You created the world, thinking you could do better than God. That was a mad idea. The world is not the place to look for perfection. However, there is a perfect plan for you and the Sonship to awaken. When something occurs in your life and you react in such a way as to be a victim, this is a perfect part of Spirit’s plan. If you were to spend your life in the belief that you are doing everything perfectly, you would be in denial. Your head would be deeply buried in the sand as you repeat to yourself “Everything is fine”. You would ignore your pain until it kills you. Then you would come back and try it again. It is through feeling the pain that you experience when you listen to the ego that you realize you need to choose differently. Without this suffering you would not choose to listen to Spirit. Each time you go through the cycle of listening to ego, feeling pain, giving it to Spirit, forgiving, and being kind to yourself – you are one step closer to letting go of the illusion. This is only possible if all of the steps are followed. You cannot learn without first making a mistake. So, the more mistakes you make the faster you learn, as long as you realize your missteps. There is perfection in your errors. You each have your vulnerable spots – your hot buttons – the places where you are most likely to go into victimhood, projection, and blame. Those hotspots are a gift that Spirit will use to help you learn to let go of the ego. Choosing wrongly is the necessary first step.

If you are in a body, you believe that you are separate from God and you fear God and his wrath. That is painful. It is not your job to hide from the pain. Spirit makes that easy for you. Spirit presents choices that make it likely that you came into contact with your pain. Spirit does not cause the pain. It is your belief in your separation and your need for punishment that cause the pain. If you are not conscious that you carry this guilt energy with you, how can you let it go? There is perfection in everything that is presented to you. There is not perfection in your ability to choose Spirit in each moment. That you will never have. You will simply, eventually reach the point that you give your pain so quickly, so automatically to Spirit that Spirit will say, “Come with me now”, and it will be the end of your earthly experience. This happens not from your perfection of action, but from your surrender of your little self to the Oneness of God. You cannot choose this moment. You can only remember that choosing to listen to the ego for an instant does not further separate you from God. It is a window of opportunity that is there to lead you home. You may have many rungs to climb up out of the hell of physicality. You will not likely be taking the express elevator out, though the ego will whisper in your ear that if you were really so Divine you would take that express ride right out of here, so you must really be a fuck up. Smile, and give all of that to Spirit. Let go of the need for perfection. Each rung will bring a lightening of the load you carry. You don’t need to demonstrate perfection; you are perfection…no matter what the ego might be saying to you. You are innocent. You are perfection.

Good Now

Sanhia

What is meant by pure non-duality?

We have been talking about the illusion. The last message dealt with acceptance and analysis while the preceding one considered cause and effect. All of this is connected to what we call pure non-duality. I am going to take a moment to define this term. Duality has to do with opposites. The physical experience is a creation of duality. Without it, there can be no physicality. Whether the split is male/female, hot/cold, light/dark, right/wrong, heaven/hell or ego/Spirit – everything in this world is based in duality. Non-duality implies oneness. Non-duality is God, is divinity, and is your true nature. When you think you are human and in a body in the physical world, you are in duality. Ascension requires the release of duality. If you want to get off the wheel, to stop experiencing heaven and hell, reincarnation, suffering, and pain – so that you can go home and experience only divinity with God – the route to follow is pure non-dualism, absolute and complete. Anything, any belief system or teaching that finds an ultimate value or purpose in the physical, such as those who wish to create heaven on earth, is not teaching pure non-duality. This is fine. It is not our job to criticize or to tell you what to believe, but we want to let you know that there are consequences to every choice that you make. The truth of you will never be hurt or damaged no matter how long you chase after illusions. One day you will wake up. It makes no difference how attached you are to the duality. Eventually you will choose to let it go. The focus here is not to try to talk you into non-dualism. If you have an attachment to the physical and want to stay, then this message will probably not have much attraction for you. For those of you who wish to go home now, who are ready to release the physical and let go of duality, you will wish to read on. That being said, it is one thing to intend to focus on pure non-dualism, but another to fully realize it. The mass consciousness does not support such thinking in any way whatsoever. Even religions that began out of the seed of pure non-dualism have been altered, so you are unlikely to find support in any church or temple. Even many of those who purport to teach from non-dualistic sources, such as A Course in Miracles, often misinterpret and dilute the message.

Here comes a primer in pure non-dualism. Everything in your physical experience is an illusion: nothing physical is real. It is not the truth. All that you perceive in the physical world comes from your mind. You are the creator of this physical “dream”, not God. It is in this dream of physicality that you think you can hide from God. As long as you “live” in this dream you experience duality. There is a balance in the physical where every “positive” is balanced by a “negative”. Duality is based upon judgment, upon what is thought to be good or bad. The ultimate judgment is that you are guilty, that you have sinned against God and He will punish you. So, you have to be good, or at least punish yourself first, to get back in God’s good graces. That is the insanity of duality. You are welcome to try and improve the duality; you have been attempting this for eons. Beat your head against the wall as long as you want, but the only way out of the quagmire is to give up duality and practice pure non-dualism. This recognizes that God does not and could not judge you, that you are innocent and loved unconditionally. You cannot earn God’s forgiveness because it is always freely granted. Pure non-dualism means letting go of your belief in your separation from God’s love and choosing to wake up from this dream and be home with God. When you make this choice, we are here at your service. The practice of pure non-dualism is not complicated; it is very simple. It does require a great deal of effort and trust because you will be asked to go against everything that the ego is screaming into your ear, ideas that seem to be logical. Ego’s voice will come from within your own mind, from others, from the mass media, and from other spiritual paths. You will find yourself surrounded by this cacophony. No matter how daunting the odds may seem, you have no choice but to eventually succeed. We are here to expedite your journey.

There are just three steps in moving from dualism to pure non-dualism. The first one is perhaps the most challenging. This step is for you to simply accept that there are two voices you can hear in any situation. You can hear the voice of the ego, which confuses you through duality, or you hear the voice of Spirit, which reinforces pure non-dualism. This step asks you to train yourself into an awareness at each moment of your life – with each thought, with each action, with each feeling, with everything that is transpiring – that you are being presented with a choice of listening to ego or to Spirit. This may sound like a small step, but how easy it is to unconsciously accept ego as the only voice, as, for the most part, you have always done. Examples of listening to the ego include entertaining thoughts of victimhood, of judgment of self and others, of comparing yourself favorably or not to another. You may contemplate why things are happening, may feel fear, may feel unloved. There are many levels and ways that the ego carries on this onslaught. Training yourself in each moment to be aware that you are listening to either ego or Spirit is an enormous accomplishment. We are not even yet talking about the discernment of which voice you are hearing – though it is likely that of the ego at this stage – only the awareness that you have a choice of two voices in this very moment, that nothing is set in stone. In step one it is just for you to be aware that you are listening to a voice. Until you become aware that you are listening to a voice, you will unconsciously be listening to ego and will stay rooted in duality. Remember that there is no judgment about this choice. God loves you no matter who you listen to. The only punishment will be self-imposed under the direction of the ego. The ego plays “good cop, bad cop”. Ego will tell you how wonderful you are in comparison to another, which may feel good. Then it will tell you how bad you are in comparison to another individual, which may not feel so good. Ego constantly plays these games with you. Be aware of that. Until you develop the awareness that you are listening to a voice, you can go no further. Ego will run your life. If you notice once a month that you are listening to a voice, you will experience slow progress. As the awareness becomes weekly, or daily, or multiple times a day – you will truly begin to move your consciousness. Ultimately, your awareness will be constant. That is the state of the master. As long as you are still in a body, ego will do its best to keep you listening, to keep you rooted in the physical. Your goal can be to have constant vigilance about noticing that you are listening to a voice.

The second step is a small but significant one. The question is, “What voice are you listening to?” Is this ego or Spirit? As you are starting down this road it won’t always be easy to discern. In general the voice of fear comes from ego and Spirit is the voice of love. But sometimes fear can feel like love – and vice versa. When ego whispers in your ear how you are better than others, it can feel like love, though it is truly separation. We want to give you some more tips on how to recognize the voice of Spirit. Spirit never compares or judges. As we pointed out last time, Spirit accepts, ego analyzes. Thinking about things opens the door to ego. Accepting whatever appears opens you to Spirit. Spirit always reminds you of your innocence, of your pureness, of your divinity. There is never blame or judgment of yourself or anybody else. You can know that it is ego if blame or judgment is heard. Spirit never compares, that also is the realm of ego. When Spirit speaks, it is always a win-win situation. There are no losers. With ego there is always some sort of competition. With Spirit there are no “shoulds”. This word implies a rightness or wrongness in a choice. It suggests that to be “good” you will make a certain choice. If you follow a voice out of the fear of what will happen if you don’t, you are following ego. If you don’t follow that voice there may be fear of repercussions. Attachment to a certain result is also from ego. Acceptance of any outcome is the voice of Spirit. Whatever happens is perfect. If there is any guilt involved, that is the voice of ego. Spirit always communicates unconditional love and acceptance. As you practice identifying the source of the voice you are hearing, you will get better. It doesn’t matter how many times you are fooled. Your only jobs are to be vigilant (step one) and to make a decision (step two). Your accuracy will improve. Just keep getting back on that horse. You are still in duality. Otherwise there would not be the illusion of having two voices to listen to. Only the truth of Spirit could be heard. Ego lies. It is trying to maintain its existence by deceiving you. Spirit is patient. Time is on its side. Ultimately the truth will out and will stand alone.

Step three is perhaps the easiest, or maybe the hardest. This step is for you to take action. It does little good to identify the speaker as Spirit if you don’t follow what He says to do. This is where you put your money where your mouth is. You act in alliance with the voice of Spirit that you have identified. There is integrity, because when you are true with Spirit you are true with yourself. Here are some suggestions to ease the creation of this alignment. Begin each day by talking with Spirit. Ask Spirit to be with you all day and to help you notice when you have a choice of voices, to identify His voice, and finally to follow it. Ask Spirit for His guidance for the day. If you wake up with something from your sleep or dreams, or from the previous day that cause you confusion, ask Spirit for direction and support. You can complete your day by having a similar communication with Spirit before going to sleep. Let go of everything that feels incomplete, unsuccessful, unfulfilling, or simply stressful. Give it all to Spirit to handle while you enjoy revitalizing sleep. Wake up freed of this heavy load and filled with love. That is the whole purpose of that third of your life; it is a time to plug into Spirit and recharge. Ask to be told what to do. There is a subtle but powerful difference here between this guidance and the voice of ego. Ego tells you what you should do; Spirit tells you what to do. There is no right or wrong about it. It is now time to trust, to fully let go of ego and only listen to Spirit. You do this in order to let go of the world and fully realize your divinity. You trust Spirit as the only voice to get you there. You realize that you have no separate voice of your own. That separate voice was always the ego. It kept you apart from God. Spirit is now telling you the most direct way home. Spirit is not the best voice to listen to, it is the only voice. It comes from within you and from nowhere else. Nobody else can tell you what you should do. Spirit speaks only to you and loves you beyond measure. This is the only way for you. That is a terrifying thought to the ego. It is probably screaming in your ear right now telling you not to give up your autonomy.  Of course the joke is that you have been doing just that for lifetimes – giving your autonomy to ego. Now, you are giving it to the divine truth within you. If you are tired of living in the duality, your job is to do your best in every moment to turn your life over to Spirit, to truly practice pure non-dualism. This is a tall order, but you will do it. You will all do this eventually. In reality it is already done and you are home with God in divine love. The play has already been written and acted out. Within the dream it feels like the illusion is still going on; it may feel like it is taking endless time. To reduce the time, follow step three in every moment possible. This, of course, requires first following step one and step two, but the goal is for those steps to become such habits that all of your focus can be on listening to and following Spirit.

Another support for step three is to be proactive by filling your mind through readings that support pure non-dualism. The world is filled with dualistic energy. You are bombarded by it daily from all sides. Taking some time to read and meditate on pure information can be a great support, not only in resisting the world but also in noticing where you still tend to make it real. Here is a short list of places to start:

  1. A Course in Miracles
  2. Gary Renard’s books (starting with The Disappearance of the Universe)
  3. The One With God series (by Marjorie Tyler, Jo Sjolander, Margaret Bollonoff)
  4. Anything by Ken Wapnick
  5. Channelings from Sanhia (either from the website or the book God Blesses You)

Start reading where you are guided. Find time wherever you can. Love yourself whether you read or not, but have the intention. You can also have the intention of finding allies, that is, others who have made the choice to experience pure non-dualism. Having even one friend with which to share mutual support can make your voyage faster. Perhaps there is a group out there for you. You do not need to be in a state of feeling alone with your path. As you progress, you will find yourself drawing like-minded energy. Give that to Spirit, asking to be supported in the highest way. If you find yourself alone though, know that that is the perfect way for you now.

While following these steps provides an enormous challenge, you also have an enormous resource to support you. The loving energy of Spirit (or Jesus, or Buddha, or Sanhia, or whatever expression of divine oneness you feel most connected with) is so far above and beyond the ego’s obstacle of fear that I hesitate to mention them in the same breath. As you choose and act from Spirit’s guidance, you fill yourself with more and more love. The accumulation of this love makes it increasingly easy to follow these three steps. This love builds on itself, spiraling higher and higher. It all starts with step one. Ask Spirit for support. Remember that all is perfect and is proceeding as it should. Accept Spirit’s gifts each day. Don’t fight, don’t resist. Trust. Listen. Then your load truly lightens. No matter what happens…….

God Blesses You

Sanhia

Can we create heaven on earth?

Can we create heaven on earth? This is an exceedingly popular question, one that many spiritual practices and teachers give much energy to. Most people have little hope that there could be heaven on earth. They tend to possess a helpless victim-like approach to their existence here, though there is usually some hopefulness that something might improve. On the whole though, they expect there will always be problems. Governments will misuse their power. Businesses will always care more for their profits than for the environment or the well being of their customers. Health will be a concern; we are victims to disease and accidents. We will never have enough money and our bosses don’t really care about us. Relationships and friendships are not fully satisfying. Those that start out ecstatically devolve into, at best, a ho-hum day-to-day survival. However, many of those who are on a spiritual path as well as a lot of spiritual teachers have decided that all of this can be overcome, that we can have heaven on earth. Working with an understanding that we are the power in our lives and that what we focus on and believe in will happen gives us the power to determine our futures on the planet. There is an underlying truth in this belief, but when we look at the wholeness of what is suggested here, the insanity of trying to create heaven on earth may become clear to you. This idea has its birth in the ego; it does not come from Spirit.

When we look at creating heaven on earth, there are several things to be aware of. First of all, this physical illusion of the earth and the universe is based on duality; it is based on opposites. In divinity there is no polarity: no good and bad, no male and female, no hot and cold, no opposites. There is simply is-ness. The whole appearance of physicalness is based on the illusion of duality that does not exist in Divinity. One thing this means is that when you try to create “good” in the universe, an equal amount of “bad” must also be created. Opposites always balance out each other. “Good” cannot exist without “bad”. There simply cannot be heaven on earth without hell on earth. In duality, you cannot create one thing without creating its opposite. So, if you succeed in creating a “good” in this illusion, somebody has to create a balancing “bad”. To further confuse the issue, your “good” may be another’s “bad” and vice-versa. Everyone is trying to create heaven on earth according to their own personal model of what that is, and how to achieve it.  If this sounds insane, please understand that insanity is the basis of duality. If you wish to follow this reasoning as far as you can, then if you wish to create “good” coming out of others, you should create as much “bad” as possible yourself, so that the balancing energy could be released. If this is an absolutely insane proposition, welcome to planet earth. It is just a dance where every action brings an equal and opposite reaction.

Creating heaven on earth is an impossibility. Heaven is your true home. It is where you are right now, though you are having a dream/nightmare that you are in a physical body on earth. There is no real earth. Your true self is in heaven as you are reading this. So, here you are trying to reinvent the wheel, trying to create something that already is. In this case, rather than having God’s absolute perfection, we have humans who don’t believe in their Divinity and are therefore capable of using only a small fraction of their infinite creative power trying to compete with God in creating heaven in the midst of duality. It is not too hard to see the futility in this. But, it could be no other way, because this earthly physical illusion only came about as the result of a crazy idea. You thought that maybe you could create something better than God was capable of doing. That was an insane idea. Then you compounded this by going into terror and fear and disappearing into your creation to hide. All humans hold guilt about this choice to separate from God. Fortunately, you didn’t succeed. It was not possible to separate from God, any more than it is possible for God to judge you, withdraw His love, or punish you. It is possible to be in a dream, to be in an illusion where you forget who you are. You cannot change who you are, but you can experience amnesia in your dream.  Your job is not the impossible; it is not to attempt to compete with God, by trying – and failing – to create heaven on earth. Your job is much easier than that. Forgive yourself. Be aware that God has no anger or judgment about what you have done. In fact, nothing has really happened. Realize that the easy thing to do is to allow yourself to be in heaven, not to try to create the impossible on earth. It is not only easier, it is also inevitable.

You will all wake up from this dream and realize your true home. You have no choice about this. All you can do is drag your feet and slow your progress down on your trip back home. You can extend time, but time is just one of the illusions of duality. Only what is real can last forever. These bodies, this earth are finite. You are real; your body and the hell around in the dream are not. Even now, as you dream of being here on earth in a body, the truth of you is in heaven. Rather than focus energy on bringing heaven here, wake up! The heaven you will find yourself in will far surpass anything you could even dream of in this illusion. Instead of doing the impossible, do the inevitable. Rather than dragging your feet, lift them up. Let Spirit carry you home. By choosing to hear that voice each day you can shrink time. You can cut off years or lifetimes. In the long run, it makes no difference. Once you awaken, this will all seem as if it never happened. In the meantime, you experience some amount of pain and suffering. Why prolong it?

If you try to create heaven on earth, you will fail. This will bring about some amount of pain and suffering. The part of you that feels helpless at not being able to create heaven on earth, but feels equally helpless in figuring out how to wake up, can feel doomed to suffer until ascension finally happens. There is a fear of seeing the earth being slowly destroyed, of wars, of corruption, and of friends, loved ones and eventually yourself succumbing to disease and then death. Does one just have to put up with all of this, to stand helplessly by? That is one choice, but it is not the only one. You can focus your energy and intention on seeing that none of this is real, just like the show you watched on television the other day. Not real. Made up. Imaginary. As you get that, you can find that watching it becomes less and less painful. In fact, it may become quite entertaining. When you know it is not real, it is not so hard to experience anything. The closest you can get to creating heaven on earth is by realizing that everything that is happening is being scripted by Spirit for one purpose only, and that is to guide you to your awakening…to your ascension. It is there to help you become aware that none of it is real and that you are and always have been in heaven. This means that whatever is happening is perfect. Realizing that it is perfect, accepting rather than judging and trying to change the gift of Spirit, allows you to begin to experience heaven. Perfection is not something that you create; it is what already exists. Your job is not to make the world perfect; it is to recognize the perfection that is already in place. When you think that something has to change, you are not accepting the perfection.

This bears repeating. You do not need to change anything to bring heaven on earth. Spirit is taking care of that. All that you need to do is to relax and accept the perfection of Spirit’s gifts, to feel gratitude. Your only response is to Spirit, as you learn to ignore the insane ranting of your ego. You don’t ask for any part of the world to be fixed. The only thing you pray for help with is your willingness and ability to hear and receive Spirit.

Help me to trust the perfection that surrounds me. Help me to know that this is not real, that no child of God can ever be truly hurt, that death is an illusion. Help me to choose your voice instead of the voice of ego, to choose love over fear. Help me to choose to believe in my innocence rather than in my guilt. Help me to reclaim my true home in heaven.

Good Now

Sanhia

Are other people a part of the illusion?

In the previous message we talked about the illusion, and I meant every word I said. Now, it is time for some balancing words. It is true that your physical body is an illusion, but it is not true that you are an illusion. You are very real. It is true that the physical bodies of others are illusions. But it is not true that other people are illusions. As you are working with this truth of the illusion, I wish to suggest that it is fine to look at everything in the physical world going on about you as illusion, including things and events. Remind yourself that they are not real. However, it is not recommended that you look at other people and tell yourself that they are illusions, that they are not real. There is a practical reason for this. Whatever you see in others, you see in yourself. I have called this the mirror effect. If you identify others as illusions, you will view yourself in the same light – or lack of light. When you see yourself as an illusion, nothing is left that is real. That can be a depressing way to exist. That will pass. No permanent damage can be done. Denying your reality, your Divinity, can never change it. You are real and so are others. In the meantime, holding yourself as an illusion may not feel so comforting.

To avoid this, simply don’t think of others as illusions or as part of the illusion. This doesn’t mean that you look at them and say, “Ah! This physicalness is real.” All physicalness is illusion. But, when you look at someone, the truth of you sees the truth of them, recognizing their Divinity. If you say that they are illusions, you are saying that the Divine is an illusion. Here is what I suggest instead. As you are observing other people around you, practice seeing them as Divine. Forget about whatever you notice them doing or about how they physically act or appear. See them with your Divine eyes, as Jesus saw everyone. Behold their Divinity. If that is a challenge for you, and some individuals will present you with enormous challenges in perceiving their Divinity, ask Spirit for support. As you master seeing others as Divine, so will you identify yourself.

Remember that when it is hard for you to recognize the Divinity in another, you are looking in a mirror. You are projecting upon the other whatever is most difficult for you to love and forgive in yourself. You are not truly seeing the other. If you were, you would recognize Divinity. If you are identifying anything less, you are seeing your mirror. Of course, when you perceive the Divinity in another, you are also seeing your mirror. When you look with judgment you are watching through the eyes of your ego. Your Divine eyes can only see with true vision, can only perceive the Divinity in another.

Knowing that the action, rather than the actor, is illusion allows you to see the Divinity. This helps you to let go of the false picture of the other person. Your projection, your judgment of the action, is what is not real. The person is real. The truth of everyone involved is unaffected by the action. No harm can be done to Divinity. This is where the illusion is significant to realize. The players are real and are Divine. Only the action is not real. So don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater. Discard the illusion of the action without rejecting the Divinity of the actor. This is true forgiveness. Whatever you see that is not Divine is your projection. It is what you don’t want to notice in yourself, because it is too painful, too frightening. Hold everything in the physical as illusion except for other people (and of course yourself).

That is it for this month. Short and sweet. See the Divinity in others so that you can see the Divinity in yourself. That is what is real. All the rest is illusion. You are real.

Good Now

Sanhia

What do you mean when you call the world an illusion?

We have talked many times about the illusion, but there has never been a single message fully describing what is meant by this term. Now the time has come. I am going to start with the ending and then go back and fill in the spaces. This is the ending: Everything, without exception, that you experience in this physical world is an illusion. Everything. None of it is real. No exceptions.

Now we will take a giant step backward. In the illusion, you can do that. In reality, there is no place to take a step and no time in which it can be accomplished. What is reality? Let me tell this as a story. In the first part of the story there is God. God is unconditional love, unlimited creativity, unlimited power, and unlimited joy. There is no duality, only the is-ness of these qualities. These descriptors are human terms and unable to do justice to what Jesus called “the Kingdom of God”. The only thing that is absolutely true and real is this kingdom. In the second part of the story, God chose to create beings or entities in the image of Himself. Remember, as always, that the language is limited. There are no serviceable gender free terms, but be clear that divinity, that God, does not have gender. There is no duality in divinity. As a default, we will refer to God as “Him”. To continue, these entities were created in the image of God, beings of unconditional love, creativity and so on, and, of course, gender free. These could be called the Children of God.

In the third part of the story, a group or a portion of the Children of God, who A Course in Miracles calls the Son of God, in their infinite creativity, decided it would be fun to construct something that would be secret and separate from God. To begin with, this was an impossible task. There can be nothing separate from God. I will now use the term “We”, because you and I are a part of this group. We are One with God and God cannot be separate from Himself. We allowed ourselves the thought that we could create separately from God and then went into that creation. We then experienced the illusion of separation. This experience was not real because we could not actually create something separate from God. We could say that this creation was like a dream. We went into this collective dream. God could not see this dream any more than a mother can see her child’s dream. In the dream we felt separate from God and had our first experience with fear. We were afraid that we could never find our way back to God and that He would be angry with us for creating behind His back. These fears were false. It is not possible for God to be angry or judgmental. However, in this nightmare we had created, all of this seemed possible. The ego is what we call that part of us that feared God and believed in the illusion.

In this way we created the physical universe. It is a part of this dream, of this illusion. We have been hiding here in the physical from God. The truth of us is still One with God. This is just a bad dream. As soon as God recognized what we had done, he created the solution. He imagined the means by which the part of our Divine selves stuck in the nightmare could reconnect with the Oneness. Because there is no time in Divinity, the solution was instantaneous. The problem was immediately solved. You could say that it was over before it began. Boom, boom. However in the illusion there is time. There is duality. So, it seems that we have been trapped in this dream for thousands upon thousands of years, for lifetime after seemingly endless lifetime. Trapped. The idea we have of hell is right here. This earth is it, but it is not real. The idea of heaven is our true home, the Kingdom of God, the place of unconditional love and unlimited joy. The challenge for us through these eons of time in the illusion has been to simply wake up to our Divinity, realizing that we are and always have been the Children of God. I have called this waking up our Ascension. These physical bodies are not who we are.

This entire physical world, every aspect of it, is an illusion. We created it, not God. This is our nightmare. As long as we hold onto it and defend its reality, it will seem real. The ego’s job is to convince us in whatever ways possible that the illusion is real and that we have no choice but to stay here. The solution that God created is called Spirit, or Holy Spirit. Spirit is the intermediary between God and the illusion. God doesn’t directly experience our dream because it isn’t real. If He were able to observe it, it would make it real. That’s the last road we would want to go down. Then our illusion would be true and we might really be stuck here. Fortunately, this isn’t the case, and God cannot get directly involved with things that don’t exist. Spirit, however, is the link between God and our ego illusion. We can listen to the voice of Spirit and be led home, or we can listen to the voice of the ego and continue spinning through lifetimes of pain, fear, and suffering. Sounds like a slam dunk choice here. However, the ego is whispering in your other ear telling you not to trust Spirit, asking you how these things that you can feel can be less real than some ideas that probably aren’t even true. Ego tells you that your divine nature is the illusion and that God is out to get you. You will have to pay for what you have done. You are guilty, guilty, guilty. Why would you want to go home to a God who is just going to punish you? Instead, you play all kinds of games trying to win God’s favor and His forgiveness. You project blame onto others, hoping God, and yourself, will be fooled and will go after them instead. All of this is impossible because there is no judgment or favor to be won. How can God love you more than unconditionally? It can’t be done. The only thing standing between you and realizing your Divinity is you. It is your choice to listen to the ego and to believe its claims that this illusion that keeps you trapped here is real.

Your job is to remind yourself every day that everything except your divinity is illusion. NOTHING that you see in this world is real. No exceptions. Scream it from the rooftops. The bodies are not real. The objects are not real. The stories are not real. The weather is not real. Your problems are not real. Money is not real; well, you probably knew that. None of it is real. The only thing that is real is your Divinity and unconditional love. Whenever you make something else more important than your Divinity, you stay trapped in the cycle of pain, suffering, and illusion. That’s all there is to it. It is very simple. When you feel trapped, give it to Spirit. Spirit is the link between the illusion and Divinity, so that you can ask for support and guidance as you deal with your fears and difficulties in the illusion. Spirit is, always has been, and always will be involved in every moment of your life. Spirit directs your story, presenting you with exactly what you need in this moment to find your way back home. Meanwhile, the ego is telling you to fear the gift of Spirit, so you push away in terror what Spirit brings to you. Maybe Spirit brings a death into your life. When you resist what Spirit brings, you are saying that you want to stay here in illusion rather than go home. Spirit is bringing death into your life to show that death is not real. It is bringing a material loss into your life to show you that things don’t matter. Spirit brings failure into your life to show you that your earthly goals are not important.

The question again is a very simple one. Do you want to listen to the ego, which will have goals for you in the physical, or do you want to listen to Spirit, realize your Divinity, and go home? The more successful you are in reaching goals in the illusion, the more attached you will be to staying there. This is why Jesus said that it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven. You can’t take it with you, not one part is real. It is all part of your dream. That is what I mean by illusion. I am not using a metaphor. I am trying to express as clearly, directly, and honestly as I can. There is nothing in this physical world that is real. You are to give up all attachment to everything physical and to trust that Spirit is always there bringing you exactly what you need to find your way home. Trust everything that comes into your life. Give up the fight and the struggle. If that is hard, give it to Spirit. If it is still hard, do the five-step process in addition. That is also a gift from Spirit to you.

Everything that happens in your life is guidance and a gift from Spirit to lead you home. Nothing here can ever be lost because nothing here is real. It is all illusion. Spirit will play with your attachments until you come into that full realization. The illusion and duality dissolve as you listen to and trust only Spirit, letting the ego go. Then you have no need for the illusion. You have no reason to create heaven on earth because your true heaven is right before you and infinitely more fantastic than anything you could dream up here. Welcome home.

Good Now

Sanhia

Why is it so hard for me to forgive?

It may seem that forgiveness is a common topic in these messages. That is true. It is true because there is probably no single concept that is of greater importance than that of forgiveness. If you wish to realize your ascension, it is absolutely central that you learn to forgive fully and completely. Without forgiveness, it is difficult to experience unconditional love. To try to love without forgiving first, is putting the cart before the horse. Forgiveness is what drives your realization of your ascension. The most efficient use of your energies is to figure out how to truly forgive. That’s where we are going today.

One of the reasons that forgiveness is difficult for you is that you may understand it to be something that is bestowed upon another because they have done something that requires forgiving. Whatever act that they have committed, you recognize it as a crime. You decide that it needs to be forgiven because otherwise you are stuck in this ego cycle. If you are a “good” person you will learn how to forgive them. What actually happens is that in this process you ever so subtly (or perhaps not so subtly) suggest that you are better than the offender. You will be the bigger person and forgive them for being such an idiot. I exaggerate to provide a little humor, but this is precisely how the attempt at forgiveness often takes place. You are still holding on to the judgment when you try to forgive in this manner. If you look deeply within, you will find that the forgiveness has never really taken place. Your belief is that the person has done wrong and needs forgiveness. No matter how much forgiving you do, that person still has done wrong. This misunderstanding is why forgiveness is so difficult.

The first step in true forgiveness is to acknowledge that nothing wrong has been done. To repeat, nothing wrong has been done. The judgment that a wrong has been committed needs to be released. The truth is that the other person didn’t do anything. If they had done something real, something that could truly hurt another, the victim would be hurt forever and ever, for eternity. Nobody has the power to do such a thing. The truth of all human souls is that they are Divine children of God and exist forever. Nothing Divine can be hurt. Only something that is not real can be damaged. Whatever it is that you are judging in this other person did not really happen. To repeat, it did not happen. Nothing real can be hurt. When you judge someone for the action you perceive them doing, it is no different than judging them for their previous night’s dream. There you can recognize that nothing really happened. It is the same in your “waking” world. The action that you have judged didn’t really happen, nobody was really injured. Nothing real, nothing Divine, can be hurt. You will wake up from this physical illusion too, some day. So, this is your job. You don’t forgive another for what they have done because you are a good person, above them and better – so that you are able to forgive. Rather, you realize that there is absolutely nothing to forgive.

Let’s look at it from another perspective. We talked several messages ago about how you define yourself. How many of you define yourself, in part, by what other people say to you or about you? Nothing that can change is real. Nobody can hurt anyone else. How could spoken words have any effect upon you? You are Divine. How can the illusion affect reality? It is time to turn this around. Nobody does anything to you. No one. There is nothing to forgive because no one does anything to you. This illusion is all your creation. You have created other people in your physical life. In this illusion of being human, you “hire” others to say and do things to you. Imagine that you have written a script. You hand it your friend and ask them to read it to you. It says horrible things about you. They ask if you are serious about having them read it out loud. You tell them to go ahead. They tell you how horrible you are. Then you get upset. You feel bad about yourself and are not happy with them. Pretty silly, huh? That’s exactly how it happens.

You are getting a two for one today. First, you are realizing that there is never really anything to forgive in anyone else. The second is to realize that whatever anybody does to you has come from your instruction. It is the only way it can be. They are telling you the judgment you have about yourself. They are telling you what you have not forgiven yourself for, the illusion that you believe to be true. As long as you pretend that it is them and not you that is the source of this information, you are stuck in a pattern of having to be superior to them for the harm they have done. As you accept that you are the source of everything that is not Divine, you realize that you have made up this whole fairy tale, this whole story. The forgiveness called for is of self. If you think that you have been wrong to think or act as you have, does this mean you now have to be better than yourself and forgive? How can you do that? You might believe that you can be better than another, but how can you be a better person than yourself? That gets pretty tricky. Now is the time to realize that this is all absolutely crazy, that there is nothing to forgive.

You have been projecting your beliefs upon God. You have created an unforgiving God. Now it gets even trickier. If God is really the one judging you, and you want to forgive, you have to be better than God. Then you can forgive yourself, which God obviously can’t do. This is the insanity of the ego. When you look at it in black and white (as you are doing now), it’s a pretty funny story. It’s really humorous. Close your eyes and feel the enormous freedom that comes from absolute forgiveness. This is not the forgiveness of your sins, but the forgiveness that says there is no sin. There never has been sin. You have always been loved unconditionally. There is nothing you ever could have done or ever could do to change that. Nobody is defining you as in need of forgiveness but you. You do not have to grovel before God begging forgiveness. Only you are holding the judgmental picture of yourself. Let it go. No amount of pleading will ever buy you forgiveness. No amount of atonement, no penance, will ever be enough. You cannot perform community service for God. You cannot make up for what never was and never will be. Such actions can only keep you in the cycle of judgment and fear. Forgiveness is only made easy when you know there is no need for it. Anyone can do it. No special skill is needed. You don’t have to be better than anybody else. There is nothing to do. Be like God.

Good Now

Sanhia

 

How can I see the divinity in other people?

We had a message several years ago about seeing the divinity in others. Some people have said that this is quite a challenge for them. They see someone acting in a certain way which makes it difficult for them to perceive that person as divine. It is such a challenge for them to practice forgiveness, they say. They understand the value of all of this but find it so hard to put into practice. What can make it easier, they wonder?  I will do my best to support you here, but I agree with you. This is not an easy process. True forgiveness and unconditional love are not simple states to attain. If they were, you would have realized your ascension long ago. This is where the pedal meets the metal. This is where the tires meet the road. This is the real work of ascension. It is easy to be in theory about what truth is, but it is the practice that makes reality real. Every day you create for yourself situations to do this work. What a blessing that is. There is never a rest. Every day. You can hide from the world, but your mind will still flash these “old stories” in front of you, and in addition, perhaps, project futures ones with endings not to your liking. The challenges that are before you can be called “seeing the divinity in another” or “practicing forgiveness”, which are actually “seeing the divinity in you” and “practicing forgiving yourself”. In a given moment the outer or the inner focus might prove easier to move through.

Think of those areas that are the most difficult for you to accept. You all have your own hot spots, but I will dangle a few in front of you. Some are general while others feel more personal. The general might include someone using their power in a way that seems to hurt many people. So you blame and are angry at politicians, businessmen, or criminals. On a personal level it may be an individual who seems to have insulted you, who doesn’t return your love as you wish them to, or who judges you – which makes it hard to see them as divine. We want to remind you that all of this is you. Nothing else you perceive to be out there is separate from you. It is all your creation. When someone is acting in a way that you don’t approve of, that is you acting. It is you that you don’t approve of. If you pretend that isn’t the case and you assume that there really are others capable of hurting you without your permission, then you are truly stuck in an endless cycle of pain, negative emotion, and helplessness. This will continue lifetime after lifetime until you agree to take responsibility. You are the creator of your earthly experience. You are manufacturing these events in an attempt to externalize all the judgments you hold about yourself. You do this in a futile attempt to hide your failings from God. You hope that God will punish them instead of you.  All of this is, as we have told you, a misunderstanding. God does not and could not judge you. You are innocent and have nothing to be judged for or to hide. However, as long as you perceive another person’s actions as real and believe that there are victims, you aren’t able to let go and forgive.

The first thing that we would suggest to you is to remember that the forgiveness you are asked to perform is always a forgiveness of self. Seeing the divinity in another is always seeing your own divinity. You cannot see the divinity in another if you are not seeing it in you. On the other hand, if you judge another and cannot see them as divine, then you cannot hold yourself as divine. It doesn’t matter where you start, whether you focus on the forgiveness and divinity of yourself or the other person. It is all one. It is all your creation. So, now use your creation. You may have chosen another to be the scapegoat, but instead you can see them as your mirror. The reflection they provide can allow you to see the self-judgment you have been avoiding. Now that you can see clearly, you can forgive yourself and replace the judgment with love. You can feel gratitude for what your mirror has shown you. You can thank them (silently) and feel love for them for providing such service. The easiest way to forgive another and to see the divinity in them is to love them. As you observe them or think of them, send them love. Keep sending them love. If your ego mind wants to throw anything else in there that is less than divine, you let that go and return to love. Love them not because they have earned it; love cannot be earned through actions. There is no logic in this love. If your mind demands a reason, the reason is that they are divine. Wherever there is divinity there is only love.

Much of this process is private. If the other individual is at a physical distance, your process has to be private. However, if the other person is right in front of you the situation is much different. Does this mean that you smile and lovingly accept whatever the other is doing? Not necessarily. A Course in Miracles speaks of something called “level confusion”. This recognizes that while you are in a body you are always acting in part from the ego. The choices you are making to forgive, to see divinity, and to act from love – to choose Spirit over ego – can only be made from the ego mind. If you fully accepted your divinity, there would be no choice to be made. This choosing of Spirit, of love, has to be made over and over. When you are confronted with a challenging situation with another, it can only be because you projected your “old story” upon them. This is difficult to deal with in that moment. It will be hard to speak to them without projecting. Deep inside you may believe that you deserve to be punished. I am not suggesting that you stand there and receive your punishment. That is not the teaching. Listen to Spirit as best as you can and do what comes to you to do in that moment. It might be to say no to whatever is coming at you. Later, when you work with the residual energy of what happened, is the time to see how everything was your creation. You do this not by blaming yourself instead of the other, but in acknowledgment that it could be no other way, that everything happens to help you see your divinity – as well as the other person’s divinity. No matter what happened or how you or they reacted, as you look back on the situation focus on loving them and yourself. When we talk of this loving, we mean without qualification. The love is never earned; it is an automatic deserved response to everyone in every situation. Nothing can disqualify them or you from this love. If something seems to be unlovable, that is your own self-judgment – take responsibility and replace it with love. In the end, forgiveness is the realization that there is nothing to forgive.

There is a stereotype of a parent who loves their child so much that, even as an adult, nothing their child could do could cause that parent to drop their loving defense. No matter what the world’s judgments may be, they stand fully behind their child. The child may lie, steal, murder, or rape, but the parent says, “Oh if you knew the heart of my child, you would love and forgive them, too.” This is what you are aiming for. Those of you who have children likely make exceptions for them you wouldn’t make for others. Make everyone your child. See them all as innocent babies. That is what you are surrounded by – millions of innocent babies. That’s all that you are – an innocent baby.

If you want to see others as divine, the first thing is to do everything you can to think of them with love. Let go of any judgments you notice yourself holding, and see them lovingly. If you are in their presence, act however you act. Away from the moment, let go of all of that. Hold that person and yourself to the highest love you can find. This is what opens the divinity in them to you. Now, full forgiveness becomes possible, knowing that in truth there is nothing to forgive, there is only divinity – knowing that none of this has anything to do with them, that it is all about you. The answer to today’s question is unconditional love, feeling it for others and for yourself. Your ego mind always tells you that you should have handled things differently. Of course, you are in a body. You act from the ego. But, that is not the truth of you. You are divine. What would it be like to feel God’s unconditional love all of the time? Feel that now. Give that to yourself. Give that to everyone else. That’s all we of you now. It is a very simple thing, just open up to that love. It is the only reality. God loves you.

God Blesses You

Sanhia