Can you talk more about the personal self not existing? Part 1

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(recorded from a live session)

The ego mind has its own definition of perfection, and it only, occasionally, accidentally bumps up against the perfection that is. Part of that picture of perfection often is that the ego mind fully understands what is going on. But the ego mind never understands what is going on. It can’t because it is insane. It feels that it is real and it thinks that you are separate from the One. And it feels it has a mind of its own that should be listened to. Einstein once said, “The mind that created the problem is incapable of creating the solution”. You can rest easily with not understanding. Understanding is the function of the ego mind. Knowing is the function of Spirit. So, when you know, it is beyond understanding. There is no explaining why you know or what you know; you just know. There is certainty. That is why when you follow the will of God there is no choice. You just know. If you think there is choice, then you are in the ego mind trying to figure it out. And, as I like to say, good luck with that, because it doesn’t matter what you choose. We’ll talk more about these experiences of noticing, being what you think of as you, but noticing. What kind of experiences? And so you find that the world doesn’t disappear if you wait and don’t make a decision. What is important? If there is fear in the now, then that is what’s in the now. That is the gift. But it is not something to be overcome. 

Participant: Coming up distrust. Sometimes it is painful and I can feel it is so hard not to project it. I can see when I project. It is like abandoning myself. Even though I see all of this it’s really hard to let it go. There is some ego voice that is so angry, or very loud. So it’s really a roller coaster. And there is another thing that is very important, that’s about my karmic eight. What an enormous ego power it has. How my impulse is really driven by this controlling bitch. That is also an important insight. 

The place that we want to come back to is this place where there is no you. If there is no you, then there are no stories. Then there is no karmic eight. That’s a story. You can deal with all of the stories. You have found in another discipline that you could deal with your feelings and deal with your feelings, and the bucket is bottomless. You never reach the end of it. There is always another feeling. There is always something else. If there is fear it works better to accept it than to resist it. But, who is having this fear? As long as you believe there is a you who has fear, you will have fear. But there is no you having this fear. That is the illusion. Go. You look and notice that there is something noticing the story; whatever it might be, that is not the story. It’s simply noticing the story. No different than if you are watching a film on the television. You are noticing that story but you are not the story. So the question continually is, “Who is noticing this?”, and, “Where is this noticer?”  If you keep looking at that and looking at that, if you think you have found the noticer, “Who is noticing the noticer you have found?”  There is a step back and a step back, but there is no forwards and backwards so we are just saying that in a metaphorical sense that there is a step back until there is simply noticing. No noticer, simply noticing. 

Participant: What does that mean? The difference?

When you are watching a film, say on the television, you are noticing. First of all, you are noticing it is all projected on the screen. It’s not real; it’s not happening in your living room. You are simply noticing a projection on the screen. Where there is a character on the screen, you are noticing the character but you are not saying that’s me. But in the screen that you call your life, you are pretending that the character that you call “you” on the screen is real. But it’s not. It’s an actor that you are watching. You can practice when you’re watching the television screen and notice where you project yourself into any of the characters – either through thinking, “Oh, they are a good character”, or “Oh, they are a bad character”, or “Oh, they shouldn’t do that”, or “What are they thinking?”, and so on. Notice that there is projection going on. It’s not real. You turn it off and everything is gone. Nothing is there. Or you can turn it back on and watch the same episode over and over and over. Does it change? It’s just a projection on a screen. So you can practice with that and notice where you are giving reality to what is on the screen. 

Participant: Now when I have experienced so much physical pain it feels so real because you can’t get away from it, or you can take a painkiller but then everything is gone. 

Now you are projecting on your screen. Is there pain present in the now? 

Participant: That is a memory I am talking about. 

But that is what I am talking about. A memory is not the now. It’s not real. It’s not happening. 

Participant: I couldn’t handle that in that way when it was there. And that’s why I bring it up – to get some guidance around it. 

In the now there may be an experience and your mind might label that experience pain. When it labels pain and names it, then it moves out of the now and allows all of the stories of pain that the mind is holding on to, to be experienced in the now. Not simply what is in the now, but the whole idea of pain and everything around it. For example, a thought comes in, “Aw (breathes deeply), what if the pain keeps getting worse and worse?” “What if it gets to a point where I absolutely can’t stand it?” “What if it never stops?” “What is the meaning of this? Is this a punishment for me?” “What have I done?!” “What’s the lesson I’m supposed to learn? What’s the message? Spirit tell me what’s the message! Why am I having this pain?” The mind goes into all of this craziness that has nothing to do with the now. It’s going off in all of these directions instead of simply noticing the sensation, which is not pain. Pain is a word. You don’t experience a word. So you experience something in the body. So you go into it and you just experience nothing but that; let the mind go. Doesn’t matter what it’s about, where it came from, why it’s there, how long – it’s just what is here right now. And so you say, “Thank you Spirit; this is what is here right now”. And you experience it. And if the mind goes a little bit nuts and it’s more than you can tolerate, then take a painkiller. (laughter). There is no right or wrong about it. And then the next time the sensation comes, it’s a new experience. It’s a new now. But you are with the feeling, not with the thought of the feeling, not with the label of the feeling, but just the feeling. I want you to notice the resistance you have to simply letting it be there. 

Participant: Yeah. I see that. 

And so, for example, you project that.

Participant: Yeah,I have noticed that. And it’s one thing to notice it, but it’s not so easy to stop it. 

Yes, but noticing comes first. If you don’t notice it, it goes on forever. And the second thing you do – you can’t stop these thoughts from coming up but you say, “Ooh, but I’m not going to act on that now. Just going to notice that it’s there.”  

Participant: Then I get a little bit shamed about, “I’m so bad I can’t deal with this”, and so there is judgment on myself and…

It’s all the same thing. Judgment is not of the now. Judgment is comparison to what the mind thinks should be there. And the mind’s crazy. 

Participant: There is this fear of letting it go because then there is this abyss. That is so scary. (laughs) Scares the shit out of me. 

So where is this abyss? 

Participant: Yeah. (laughs) Where is the fear? From where does it come? If I accept it then it just takes over. So that is why there is some fighting against it. 

It already has taken over. (laughter) You’ve been letting it take over, empowering it all of your life. They say that the horse is already out of the barn. The thought of the mind always is dual. There is good and there is bad. Only the good is of God; the bad is not. And of course where you fit in, the you you think of as you, you’re on the bad side. 

Participant: I am? (laughs) Always. Trying to be good. “God look at how good I’m being. I’m so good.” But you believe that you’re bad. So what? Punishment? Sickness? “Guilt, fear, all these punishments that come to me because I’m bad.” “But I’m trying to be good. Tell me what I should learn here, God.”  (laughter) And all we’re saying is there’s no good or bad here. Whatever God brings is from God. There are no good gifts from God and bad gifts from God. It’s all Divine. The mind says, “Where is the love?” The truth says, “It’s all love. That’s all there is.” The mind says, “How can I feel loved?” The truth says, “You are love.” But the mind that sees a you as real, separate from God, then sees you as not love, because God is love and you are separate from god, therefore you are not love. 

Participant: Damned if I do and damned if I don’t. 

Loved if you do and loved if you don’t. 

Participant: (laughing) I think I’ll choose that. Is it possible to choose that? Who is choosing?

You’re choosing damned if you do and damned if you don’t, because as long as it’s you choosing, you are choosing separate from God. So no matter what you choose, you are choosing separation. But the truth is…not real. You’re not separate. And the pain is just on the screen. It’s not real. The part of you that believes there is a separate you also believes that pain is probably a good thing; because if you suffer enough, God will take you home. And if you stop suffering you are lost in hell forever. 

Participant: It’s a lot of confusion.

It’s only the mind that creates confusion. There is no confusion, It’s very, very simple. Whatever is here is from God and is Love. If you want to resist and fight it, that’s when it gets confusing. You simply silence what is. How crazy would it be to try to change what is; it already is.

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What do you mean by ownership?

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This conversation comes from a recent session.

Participant: You have used the term ownership a few times. Can you explain what you mean by that?

There is a quote attributed to Jesus in the New Testament in which he states that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. In another situation Jesus is asked by a rich young man what he would have to do to become a follower. He was told to give all of his money to the poor. The young man chose to remain at home. Another significant Jesus quote relative to ownership is where he said that the kingdom of God is within you. Ownership, though, is not limited to money. This should not be interpreted to mean that you must give up all money and live in poverty in order to realize your Divine awakened nature. Ownership is a state of mind. When you say that something is yours you are expressing ownership. This would include your ideas, story, partner, children, friends, health, and career…. We could go on and on. When a possessive pronoun is placed before a noun, ownership is implied. Ownership keeps you stuck in the illusion for a couple of reasons. First of all, none of the things you possess are real. There is no story or career. There is no past or future, no partner, and no money. I guess some of you would readily agree with the last two. (Laughter) These things are all a part of the illusion, of the movie. They have no true existence. Of even greater importance is that the being you call you also has no existence. That is what you consider your greatest possession. To be awakened is to have no sense of self. There is no identification with the body/mind construct, that is – no sense of self, but simply the noticing of the body as you might observe the sky or a building or anything in the manifested world.

Participant: Is ownership the same as control? Is letting go of ownership like letting go of control?

Of course. There is nothing. There is nothing to control. If there is nothing there, how can anything be controlled? So, …. We could stop right here. This is really the message……but let’s talk about it some more. I encourage you to be aware of where you hold ownership. We have used terms like the Divine or Holy Relationship, the Divine Presence, or the Divine Now. None of these involve any ownership whatsoever. You cannot possess anybody or anything. You can neither control them nor change them. What is there is simply noticed, accepted, and loved. Without ownership there are no loves and hates.

Participant: (laughter) Wow!

This isn’t to say that there might not be the noticing of preferring to or not preferring to be with, say, a certain person. That won’t change; there simply will be nobody there to have those likes and dislikes. There is no ownership of the reaction. This is an impossible concept for the ego mind to wrap itself around. But then, all of being awakened is like that. Without ownership there is no ego mind. It is the ego mind that believes it has things and needs them in order to get where it believes it needs to go, but there is nowhere you need to go. You are where you want to be, though there is no you there. When you hold on to things, your focus is on them and therefore on you, the holder, the human entity who feels separate from the Divine. This does not mean that you do without all these things. There are still going to be homes, vehicles, money, jobs, friends, enemies, partners, children, and relatives, but they will not be owned. They will simply be in your movie.

Participant: So, there are no likes or dislikes for the awakened me?

We have talked about this with emotions. Rather than saying, for example, that you are depressed, you notice that depression seems to be present. The former expresses ownership of a feeling. There is no definition of self as depressed. Again, ownership is not restricted to objects or people. It includes thoughts, feelings, and health. Anything tacked on to the end of the thought or statement “I am” shows ownership. I am happy. I am poor. I am sick. Awareness simply notices the apparent presence of happiness, poverty, or sickness. The ego mind might argue that it can’t see any difference, but you will find that noticing without ownership allows a totally different life experience. There is nobody there in the awakened state to own anything. Therefore, it is as impossible to lose anything as it is to hold on to it.

Participant: Doesn’t saying “I am” still imply that you exist?

That’s a sharp question. Who is? Is there ownership of being? We would suggest that you first practice dropping the words that follow “I am”. When that becomes your default thought in all situations, we’ll have further discussion about your question. There is beingness and it cannot be possessed. It simply is. It is what is aware of the created, the phenomenal world.

Participant: Is surrender to the Divine what you are talking about here. I have been trying to surrender control of my health to Spirit. Are you saying that this is a giving up of the ownership of my body? 

Yes. We can look at it in this way. You have been letting go of control of your personal will and asking to be able to surrender to God’s Will. What is being suggested here is not just letting go of the personal will but letting go of the person. There is nobody there to have a personal will. You can have that awareness. It’s not simply noticing that you have a personal desire which is separate from God’s Will, but that you are believing in a person existing that could have such a will. There is no you who could want something; there is no you who could lack anything. There is no you. There is only Divinity observing the situation. The ultimate step in giving up ownership – beyond letting go of people, things, thoughts, and feelings – is this letting go of ownership of self. There is no person here.

Participant: I think that is very hard to understand that there is no person here. What is it then? 

A movie. A hologram. A creation of the Divine Mind.

Participant: Yeah? That is difficult to understand, to grasp in some way what this Divine Mind is.

The Divine Mind has not only created this body you are pretending is a real person with a separate identity, but has created the whole movie, the whole thing …… the whole universe, everyone who seems to be in it, and every aspect of it including the “laws” by which it seems to function. That’s what Divine Mind has created; what you think of as you is not separate from any other part of the physical manifestation, whether animate or inanimate. The perfection of the Divine You has created this and is watching it, but it is not the personal you which pictures self as the creation and not the Creator. This brings on the feelings of separation and all the pain and suffering that goes with it. When the ego self believes it can own anything it is giving both self and the objects a reality they don’t have.

Participant: I can feel how a partner and projections upon him is so connected with ownership. It is another word for the same thing. Just saying “my partner” is expressing ownership. 

You’ve got it! The thought “my partner” implies ownership. Who is owning? The owner is the one you think of as your self, who feels separate from the rest of the universe and certainly from “her” partner. Ownership requires a separation of the owner and the thing owned. With Oneness there is no separation. The saying, “I am you and you are me” expresses no separation. No separate self exists. There is just the One, created by your Divine Self which is watching the movie it created.

Participant: This is scary.

What is scary about it?

Participant: It is like letting go of the only branch connecting to this world of confusion and going into freefall. 

So, who is holding on to this branch?

Participant: It’s this little me, a creature who is so terrified of God.

The Observer is simply observing. It doesn’t have the terror possessed by the little one being observed. The observer is not the person. It is simply watching. When you see only from this Watcher, there is no terror.

Participant: I can feel that this is what you mean when you suggest to fully let go and let God.

Now, as we never grow tired of saying, but you can’t get there from here. (much laughing)

Participant: Now it is a real riddle here. (continued laughing)

The ones who think they exist and possess things and need to possess things in order to survive and protect themselves are not able to choose to let go of that because there is nobody there to choose to let go. The ego mind cannot choose. The best that you can do is to be aware that there are beliefs in ownership and not act from that and to allow the emotions that are triggered to be there until they aren’t. You may find yourself attached to less and less.

Participant: Nothing left to lose.

Yes, without attachment or ownership, when something goes out of the picture there is no sense of loss. The picture is still there. It keeps on running.

Participant: But it really helps when I feel like I have nothing left to lose.

When you say, “I have nothing left to lose”, you still have “I” to lose. And it may come down to that for some. They lose everything until they finally lose themselves.

Participant: It’s a little bit tempting.

You can also do it a piece at a time. you notice that there seems to be ownership present. Whatever it is. Whenever the possessive pronoun enters the mind, you notice that there seems to be ownership here.

Participant: There is a fear here that if I go against the mass consciousness in this way I might be seen as crazy. For me, to be perceived as crazy is the worst thing that could happen. 

At the same time, you recognize that the mass consciousness is crazy. The mass consciousness believes the world is the cause and you are at effect. The mass consciousness believes that it needs to choose and choose well. It believes that you are responsible.

Participant: But what happens if I am ostracized?

The awakened individual is by definition ostracized. It no longer belongs, even though it appears to be fully participating. It is not connected to a body and to the world as others are.

Participant: Can you still use the language of the ego when talking with others, though you have fully let it go inside of you? Otherwise, you run naked in the world.

When you are out and involved with the world, you can play any role. You have no identity as a person, but you certainly have a personality. There is nothing you need to do or be; you simply react in the moment. In fact, there is no you. There are no goals such as presenting an enlightened face to the world, – whatever that might be – healing or awakening others. There is no purpose. There is just life. There is awareness. There is the movie, but there is no “you” in it. The form will still be out there carrying on, having all the experiences you have now, but with no sense of ownership of any part of it. There is no you to own it.

Participant: Sanhia, it is amazing to see that when You are speaking with people You meet them exactly where they are. The language is exactly what that moment calls for, exactly what that person needs to hear. Is that what you are talking about here? Is this “being in the world but not of it”?

All that language does is to point. One looks at what is being pointed to and may find it interesting and wonder what to do with it. There is nothing magical about the words that come through Michael. They are just what is there and are simply shared. Everything that happens can only be perfect. The language is not there to teach what the truth is. The awakened you does not need to walk around telling everybody what the reality is. Then they might lock you up. (laughter) Jesus warns not to cast your pearls before swine – and of course we are not calling the unawakened pigs – but there is no reason to cast them unless that is the guidance in the Now. You might take it as a sign that another is ready to hear something if they come and ask for help. It’s not just a question of intuiting what should be said, but it is responding to questions with what comes to the consciousness in the moment. I am not approaching random people on the street and saying, “give your money to the poor and follow me”, or “divorce the bitch or bastard, quit your job, and follow me.” (much laughter). We are not saying that. All that I do when somebody comes up and asks for directions is to scratch my chin and say (points) “I think you go this way”. Maybe they are more lost after talking to Me than before, but that’s not My problem. (laughter) My job is simply to point.

Participant: I like this pointer I have received from you now, but I am aware there is a fear to be noticing, but there is also a big yes.

When there is ownership there is something to take care of, something to protect and defend and to be afraid of losing. Without ownership, as you pointed out before, there is nothing to lose. There is nothing you have to do, no responsibility. This is a great and tremendous freedom. It points to awakening. You cannot choose to awaken, but you can notice when ownership is present, recalling that possessions just lead to pain and suffering.  So, you don’t follow that train, don’t act on those thoughts. If a thought comes to mind about “your” partner, you recognize that you think you own your partner. What a responsibility that is. Now you have to make that person be who you want them to be. If you notice that there is no control possible, then there is nothing for you to do. Perhaps ultimately it will be noticed that there is no you to even try to be the controller. If there is no you to be hurt or abandoned or upset, there is nothing but freedom. It doesn’t matter what you or others do. Whatever is done is simply done.

Participant: It’s like if the relationship is with the Divine, then it’s just “Let go and let God”.

Yes. Unless your relationship with God or Spirit or the Divine is, “Bring me my perfect relationship. Bring me money. (laughter) If you are trying to control God, then it is your God, it’s your Jesus, and then what happens? ….. You end up pissed. You asked for specific help and adequate delivery was not forthcoming. (laughter). This possession becomes total: your religion, your beliefs, your reality – as if it could possibly make a difference to the truth of the universe what crazy beliefs your ego mind might have. Reality is what it is, not what you think it should be. You cannot see reality before you if you are blinded by your reality.

Participant: I can feel this enormous relief and at the same time I can notice how much fear I have.

Yes. Good! Fear seems to present, but it is not owned. Take a step back and notice the fear. Notice who is noticing the fear.

Good Now

Sanhia/Spirit

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Can you speak more about the observer who is not from the ego mind?

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We have talked before about the observer. The observer is the one who is watching this movie that you call your life. What are perceived by your eyes are objects. These objects could be trees, birds, clouds, baskets, cars, or people. These are all a part of your movie. The body is also an object you see. If you have the goal to be one with your body, you want to make the subject and the object to be the same. This is not possible. You cannot simultaneously be the observer and the observed. You cannot watch yourself. You cannot do that any more than you can look at the window and say you are now one with the window. Something other than your “self”, or your body, is doing the watching. The Observer of the movie simply sees; It does not have the possibility of jumping up on the screen and acting at the same time. This is why We say that you are not your body. The You that is watching, the real You, cannot at the same time be what it is watching. When you identify yourself with the character in your movie, you have ceased to notice that you are the watcher and now pretend yourself to actually be the object on the screen. But You are not an object. The body, the object, does not experience the movie; it is a part of the movie. The true You is the Observer Who watches the body and notices what it is doing, thinking, and feeling.

If the thought arises that you want to experience Oneness, you are saying that you lack Oneness. This is not true. Your ego mind believes that it is separate, but the Observer is One with what it sees, though it is not what it sees. The subject is not the object, though there is no separation. There is only Oneness. There is no identification with the body, there is only the seeing of it. The Observer is One with everything that is. It is the creator of all that is. The thought of wanting in the ego mind affirms its pretense of separation. You can notice that such a thought seems to exist in the ego mind. You cannot make yourself feel oneness. All you can do is notice the thoughts of separation the ego mind holds and bring the awareness back to the now and the next thought. You keep peeling away what is being held onto that stands in the way of experiencing the Oneness. Thus, Oneness is not a goal; It is what is always present. To try to experience that is to maintain the illusion of being separate from it. The only process is to let go of everything that isn’t Oneness. You don’t try to change what is, that only feeds it. You simply do not dwell on the thoughts. The job is to be the noticer, not the thinker, the analyser, or the understander.

Let me give another picture of the perspective of the Viewer. The ego mind sees time as a horizontal line. It sees the now as the point where the past and the future intersect. In truth there is no point of now that exists because the movie is in constant motion. There is no way that you can try to be here now, because now is a moving target. There may be an attempt to hold on to something that can never be grasped. The result is likely a sense of failure to stay present without finding you are easily slipping into the past. Even the intention to experience nowness comes from the mind which is rooted in the past. Let’s replace the horizontal timeline with a vertical axis. The viewpoint of the Divine Observer comes straight down and contacts only the moment, not the whole horizontal timeline. Nothing is seen except what is directly in front of the Viewer. There is just what is. As long as the mind seems to wish to alter what is observed in any way, the appearance of separation is created; the viewpoint has returned to the horizontal timeline. The vertical perceives no past or future. Thoughts of wanting to be elsewhere are seen just as clouds in this moment’s sky. They are noticed and the eyes move on to the next thing that is presented. From the vertical perspective there is no such thing as past or future. There is just what is. You cannot look from this perspective and see a “younger” you. You might observe a thought of a “younger” you, but it will be quickly replaced by another thought or feeling. No “younger” you exists; no “older” you exists. Nothing exists but what is present now.

The object that is the “you” You are perceiving may be having thoughts about an imagined past or future, but all that is there is that “you” now. Not only is there no reality in the past and the future, but what is being viewed is not real either; it is all a movie. If the actor on the screen is perceived as an object by the Observer, rather than as self, that is an awakened viewpoint. All there is to do is to notice the passing of a thought. If upon noticing the thought you jump in and try to fix, heal, or otherwise change the situation, perhaps believing that you are as you are because of your “past”, you are back in the ego mind game and can only be certain of continued pain and suffering. You have again tried to make the object out as the subject, which it isn’t. Instead of looking down vertically at what is, you jump into the illusory timeline trying to heal the past and change the future. You are Divine as you are. There is nothing to heal, fix, or change. The you that is the Observer sees with Divine eyes. There is nothing to do to become enlightened. It is as simple as opening your eyes. Stop pretending to not be awake. See what is present without holding judgements. There is nothing that needs to be earned. It is your true birthright. Nothing has ever been done that needs to be atoned for. Nothing has ever actually been done. There is just now. See it from the vertical perspective. Seen for itself there is nothing to be changed. Everything is perfect. And You are One with it.

You are each watching your own movie. No two see the same film, even if they appear to be walking side by side. If you are thinking you are the character on the screen, you don’t see what is happening. You see from your ego mind perspective. If you rewind your movie back ten minutes, are you now in the past? Does that make the past real? You can jump all around in a movie. Does that make anything real? The movie has a beginning which for you might look like birth. Did the Viewer not exist before the movie began? The movie has an end which is called death. The Viewer is still there watching. If you are the actor, who is watching the actor? Through whose eyes do you see? Where are those eyes looking from? Can you be watching the movie and be in it at the same time? If you throw yourself against the screen, can you merge with the film? It’s just a movie. It’s not real, it’s just up on the screen and you’re watching it. Things become very simple. You are not the character on the screen. The movie is not real. You are just watching it. You can have no effect upon it. The movie has already been made. It is just playing. The script has been written. The actors have been cast. It has been directed and filmed. The special effects have been added.

One way to help the letting go of seeing yourself as the body and the seeing of things as they are is to change your language, certainly in your thoughts and out loud when you can get away with it. Stop referring to the physical body as I or me. Refer to that self in the third person. The words “I am” should stand alone, not to be followed by any descriptors. For example, rather than saying “I am sad” try “There appears to be sadness here”. Go a step further and replace “sadness” with words that describe the bodily sensations that seem to be present. Wherever words carry a heavy emotional weight for you, look for more neutral descriptors to use. Otherwise, you will likely go back to acting as if you are the object instead of the subject.

The question then arises as to how one becomes the Observer instead of the observed. It is important to be aware that all questions are generated by the ego mind, which is unable to ever find satisfactory answers. You can be aware that as long as there are questions and any beliefs that the body and the world are real, there cannot be a looking from the Observer taking place. All you can do is notice that you are still pretending to be the object and ask yourself who is watching this. Where is the observer located? If it is within your body, then find it. If the self seems to be interacting with the movie, who is watching this interaction? Wherever interaction is perceived, that is the observed and not the Observer. Take a step back and see who is observing the interaction. Each time you notice an identification with the actor, take another step back and see who is observing this. The part that wants to interact and believes that the movie can be changed is not the true You, the Observer, Who is simply noticing all of this. The movie, however, cannot be changed and so the actor is constantly frustrated. It is even scripted as to how long you will resist, argue, question, and continue to try to change the unchangeable before you give up trying and fall back to your true place as the Observer. You appear to have the choice to continue flailing away or to sit back, enjoy the show, and say “Pass the popcorn please”. You can’t make yourself let go and watch from the Observer’s eye, nor can you stop yourself from doing it. You cannot will yourself into being the Observer because you already are that. All you can do is notice where you wish to act and stop doing it.

One of the games of the ego mind is to say that if you are just the Observer you will no longer have any involvement with your movie, with other people, or with the world. The object “you” in the movie will still interact, but not in any attempt to change the movie nor with any goal or outcome in mind. The responses and actions will just be whatever is moving in the now. It is like improv theater. There is no conscious script nor outcome in mind. One simply responds spontaneously to the scene. The next response is absolutely dependent only on the new cues presented. There is no forethought nor afterthought. That is the game. It is comparable to a tennis match. All that matters is this shot. If your mind is anywhere else, you are not fully present for the next volley. This is just a movie. You know that you are not going to change anything; You are aware of no purpose. Yet, there You are, and you fully engage in the moment. But what possible reason could there be for an apparent birth and death, activities and relationships, failures and successes, ups and downs – all just to disappear? The ego wants you to believe that there is a purpose, a meaning in all of this. Where is it found? The Observer just witnesses apparent activity; it sees no plan. Ego mind creates a story with a beginning and ideally a happy ending. Spirit mind sees just life appearing to happen. Even for you on a spiritual path there is a thought that you will wake up and then understand the purpose and meaning of your life. You are already awake, and you can stop chasing your tail. You can begin that task by asking yourself who is chasing your tail. As you step back and observe from the true You, however, instead of understanding the answer, you will find that there are no questions. Some would say that the experience then is one of absolute Love, not as an opposite of hate or fear, but a steady state no matter what seems to be happening on the screen.

In conclusion, neither I nor anyone else can tell you how to accomplish the feat of releasing the ego self and viewing everything from the Divine Perspective. Nor can anyone explain to you what it will be like to realize the Divine View. Nobody will be there to have such an experience. There will be no sense of being awakened or enlightened because those are ideas of the separated mind. It is easier to try to tell what won’t be there. There will be nothing to fix. There will be no responsibilities. There will be nothing to understand. There will be no questions. Any questions?

Good Now

Sanhia/Spirit

Why do you tell stories?

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Now it is my turn to ask the question. Why do you tell stories? As you cannot hear the tone in my voice, please understand that this is not asked in a judgmental tone. The question isn’t one of should or shouldn’t you tell stories or are stories good or bad. This is an investigation that we can conduct together into what the story is behind your stories. There are some tales that you might just tell one time. Say for example that an interesting thing happens to you while you are out shopping. You come home and share it with your partner. You laugh or cry or scratch your heads about it together and it never comes up again. You have lots of stories like that. Something makes an impact upon you and you choose to share it with someone else. These are not the types of narrations that we are going to zero in on, though the same thought processes could be used with any tale. What we are concerned with today are the stories that you carry around with you like gems in a sack; you take one out and polish it and share it over and over with different people or perhaps just mull it over for your own entertainment. Some of them you have shared dozens of times and maybe more than once with a given individual. It may be difficult to remember who you have shared it with or how times the tale has been told. Some of these stories are about successes you have had, something you achieved, or somebody you helped. Sharing such tales may make you feel better for a while. Some of your sagas might be about victimhood, what someone did to you or some unfortunate occurrence. Perhaps they relate what a tough year you have had or even about something that you have never been able to recover from.

The first thing I would like to investigate with you is to look at the reasons why you share these stories. The purpose in this line of inquiry is to support you in being in the now, to encourage the awareness of your awakened self. So we come back to your sagas and view them from that standpoint. What is your motivation, your reason for telling your tale? I wish to begin by suggesting that you become aware of the thoughts you have around any story, as I have encouraged you to do with each thought that enters your mind – a story being just a drawn out thought. It’s a picture you have from the past that you are sharing in the now. First of all, the narration has nothing to do with the now other than the fact that you are presently thinking about it or relating it. I think we can agree that the tale is about the past, not about what is now happening. As we know, there is no such thing as the past. You cannot find a place called the past. There is only the present moment. So the story is something your mind brings forth in the present that relates to an imagined past. I say imagined, because it isn’t really there. What you are describing is not going on. When you are telling the saga about this imagined happening, you can’t even have certainty that your story matches what supposedly happened if, indeed, anything did really occur. You have your perception of this past occurrence, peppered with your projections. If another who was involved in this story was to be the teller, the “facts” would likely be quite different. This would certainly be true if the other was the so-called victimizer in your story. So, we are not talking about “truth” when we refer to these narrations. If you say to your children that you are going to tell them a story, they won’t be expecting the evening news. They expect the tale to be made up. Are any of your stories really any different from that?

Let’s say that you want to tell a story about something you think happened to you that you wish had not occurred. We’ll say that it was painful, whether physically, emotionally, psychologically, financially, or some combination. You still feel that you suffer some from what happened. What now is the motivation for sharing this tale? This is what I want to encourage you to look at. I can’t tell you what your motivation might be for sharing any particular story, but if you are unconscious of your purpose, you are unaware of what you are actually doing and what effects it may have on your present moment. As we mentioned in the last message, your actions are very important. Through the action of retelling this story you are expressing your belief in its verity. Do you want your listener to think “Oh, poor you” and give you at least a spiritual hug to ease your pain? If that is the case, you are asking for validation of your painful saga, for support for your victimhood. You are asking them for agreement that this event should not have happened. Not only are you carrying around an old story that keeps you from noticing what is in the now, but your old story is based on not accepting what happened. Instead of experiencing what is present in the now, are you choosing to fill your life with sadness and anger from a thought memory in your head?

You may not choose to have a memory come to mind, but you do choose to hold onto it and to feed it through retelling. Is there a benefit from this choice? Does the sharing of your narrative allow you to release it forever? Likely there is a tradeoff where you receive a short term relief from the listener in exchange for a longer term continuance of the pain and suffering. If you continue to tell the story it is like another drink for the alcoholic. The attention helps for a while, but the benefit wears off and you feel compelled to tell the tale again. Of course you are not limited to one story; you likely have a collection of them in your arsenal. Look at the different elements in your narration and ask yourself if you are sure that each one is true. Be honest with yourself. You have nothing to gain from trying to pull your own leg. What happens if you accept the absolute perfection of that event having occurred? If this presents a big challenge you can ask Spirit to help you accept the perfection of the now. This story is coming into your now, but why? Is this tale to be told, or is it to be released so that it no longer blocks you from being present? It is not being suggested that you pretend as if this event never happened to you, to go into denial, but what happens when you choose not to be weighed down by something that is nowhere in sight in the present moment?

Perhaps an old story that you tell repeatedly is one that was highly traumatic for you, such as experiencing violence, molestation or rape, or the death of a loved one. Part of the belief that your mind carries and society reinforces is that you not only are saddled with this event for the rest of your life, but that it is your duty to never forget. A judgment, a condemnation of the act must be expressed. Such actions are not acceptable. It is your job to ensure that the deed is never forgotten, to make sure it doesn’t happen again. The perpetrator deserves condemnation and punishment. This is what mass consciousness teaches. Now, accepting the perfection of the now isn’t a justification for an action. It is not saying that it is okay to intentionally harm another. But the truth is that it happened. Right or wrong it happened.  The truth is that whatever is in the now is happening. There is nothing you can do to change any of that. Asking Spirit to help you accept the perfection of what is happening or has happened does not mean you want to be shown that it was okay for somebody to do what they did. This is about you. It is about realizing that anything that is in your now has already been accepted into existence. Not accepting it is a denial that it has already happened. It is not changeable. Any attempt to accomplish that is a fool’s task, one at which you cannot succeed. Notice your pain; notice your emotions; return to the present and see what is there now. Pain and suffering are not constants. Everything moves and changes. Let it; watch it. The past is unchangeable. The future does not exist. There is just now. Do your best to focus here. This requires enormous will, but no understanding. It asks only that you persist in staying present, while noticing when you aren’t able to. Your job is not to understand. That is a gift that may or may not be brought into your now, but it is never the goal. There is no goal, only focus. Free will is not a matter of being able to choose what will happen; it is the ability to choose your reaction. Fighting what is or what has happened will lead to a life of pain and suffering, to war within you and with the world.

I want to remind you that every person out there, no matter how hurtful their actions might appear to be, is a Child of God, trying the best they can to find love, to find their way home, to find God. Like you they may not always be making the best choices in order to accomplish that, but they will always have the option to learn from the choices they make. Nobody will ever find the love that is the truth within them if their mind is consumed with victimhood.

The idea may be formulating now in your mind that telling stories might not be a wise course to choose to follow. However, it is always a good idea to look at why a story wants to be told. Perhaps you are listening to another tell their sad or angry story. That brings to your memory a similar type of story that you might have once told, but now you accept the perfection of what occurred and may feel a deep sense of gratitude for what happened. You are aware of how that event helped you to let go of a whole layer of victimhood and you feel freed by that acceptance. You might feel guided to share your story and what you have done with it. Rather than suggesting to them what they could do with their story or lecturing them on how it hurts them – usually not the best choice in any situation – you just talk about you. Maybe you tell your story in such a humorous manner that people laugh at it and that brings you enjoyment, because you have not elicited pity but have brought lightness to the whole situation. You may need to be able to laugh at yourself. Laughter helps to center people in the now. Stories can provide an absolutely  beautiful, divine service. Jesus conducted much of his teaching through stories or parables. They can bypass the ego defense structures people have in place to fend off challenging ideas. Sometimes I “out” Michael by sharing some of his personal stories when I am talking with groups. He is hesitant to do this himself, not wishing to appear arrogant or superior. He gets to observe – whether it is a story about a time he fell flat on his face but learned much, or a situation when he acted in the way I was suggesting he go, despite great fear – that others can benefit and gain courage and inspiration from hearing them. Stories can help move people off the pedestal where you may have placed them. Such tales remind you of what you hold in common with them. They can show possibility.

Again, ask yourself why you want to tell a story. It might prove helpful to go on a story diet, severely limiting the number you share. Instead, spend that energy investigating the stories, checking to see if holding on to them is keeping you out of experiencing the now, looking to see what untruths may be promulgated through them. Always look at the motive behind your wish to share a tale. As a story comes to mind, remember to notice if you have told it before. Be brutally honest with yourself about why the story bears repeat telling. The ego can be very convincing in encouraging you to share a story because it would be “good” for someone else to hear it, when the actual purpose is to get stroked for how evolved you are. There is nothing wrong with wanting a little attention, but it is helpful if you are upfront with yourself about your motives. When in doubt, you might wait until the story seems to be dragged out of you. Do you find yourself being in a competitive situation with others, wanting to get your story in? Try being a good listener, perhaps asking them questions. Is there something there for you in another’s story? Do you find yourself in judgment of what you are hearing? What are you projecting onto the other person? Realizing that will likely benefit you more than having your fifteen seconds of glory from telling your own tale. If you truly listen and find common ground with another, there may open up a space for you to offer true support. Be compassionate with others with their stories as you are hopefully gentle with yourself and your old sagas. That’s my story and I’m sticking with it.

Good Now

Sanhia/Spirit

How am I to deal with disease?

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The message this month is perhaps going to be a little different. We are going to speak about sickness with a special focus upon Michael and Ulla. As we speak, Michael has experienced being sick for the past two weeks. We imagine that most of you have some kind of idea of what that might be like. For Michael it has been a long time since he has had such extended sickness, perhaps not since childhood. Ulla has known him for ten years and has never seen him sick for more than a few days. Part of Michael’s good health was fear based. As a young man he wanted to live as long as possible, a hundred – even two hundred years. He wanted to always stay in the best possible health. It was not just diet and physical practices, but most importantly mind over matter. Perhaps he believed he might need that much time to figure out how to ascend. Perhaps it was ego trying to show that it was stronger than the outer world. When others became sick he had judgment. It was their minds that created the sickness. They believed in seasonal health problems. They believed they could catch things from others. Several years ago I let Michael come down with a short sickness to help humble him. He was able to begin to release the health judgments he had been holding toward himself and others.

Now we find something quite different. For two weeks he has found himself to be of very low energy, though that is slowly increasing. There is some physical discomfort, though that is slowly decreasing. There is almost no appetite, though that is also slowly increasing. But still after two weeks, there is not a lot of energy or appetite. Ulla expresses that she believes there must be some purpose or reason for this sickness, and wonders what it is. She also expressed how it touches her fear of losing Michael. She is a little pushy with Michael, asking him what Sanhia has to say about it. Before giving Michael’s response, I want to talk a little about how our relationship has changed since his days of desired physical immortality, culminating in ascension. Michael has come to accept the illusion of the physical. He realized the insanity of wanting an illusion to stay alive. Michael surrendered his physical death totally to Me. He let go of any need to control the timing of any of it, trusting me to take care of everything in the perfect manner. Truth is, I had been doing that all along. So, Michael’s response to Ulla was that Sanhia says to just be here now, to accept the perfection of this moment without wanting it to be any different. I would be less than honest if I were to say that Ulla was pleased with this answer. There were two reasons for this, first it did not leave her any opening for suggestions, “You could take this supplement or follow this action.” My directions specifically said to accept what was. Secondly, this left her deepest fear exposed, death. What if Michael is in the process of dying? This was quite a trigger! I joked to Michael how honorable it was for him to sacrifice his body so that Ulla could face her fear of death. Just kidding, of course.

I will say that Michael did a fairly good job of doing just what I asked him to do, to be present with this. His attitude about death is very clear; this body will die. It’s not up to him when it happens. It is only for him to accept and live whatever is gifted in each moment. So he has passed these days fearlessly, if not always comfortably. His challenges have been to look at where he is feeling discomfort, accepting what is felt rather than wishing to change it.

Now, as they say, life goes on. During the two weeks there were two, two-hour online spiritual alchemy groups scheduled. There was also a four-and-a-half hour in person spiritual alchemy group. Michael had no energy for any of these events. For the longer group, he was pretty much strapped to a chair with a blanket hung over him. None of this had any effect upon the channeling. I communicated clearly to Michael that it is part of his purpose and agreement that he let me come through. Even though he was without energy, all he had to do was to stand back out of the way. Fortunately, that required no energy. I was able to come through powerfully, saying what people needed to hear. I was filled with energy; I was my normal witty self. People did not even need to know what their questions were, because I was already there. Now that has been the nature of my relationship with Michael. However this further clarified things for him, as to the difference in our parts. If he had fantasized that his part had anything to do with the wit, the humor, and the precise comments, he was quickly disabused of that. Had it been up to his energy, there would have been no groups. It was so clear what the channeled energy was.

Michael is aware that there are only two things for him to do, the first being to follow whatever My wishes might be – mostly as channel and as scribe, but also playing and performing music on the side. Otherwise, his only job is to take nothing seriously and accept the perfection of whatever is presenting itself now. It is in that light that we have encouraged him to hold this sickness. It is a bit of a wild card he has drawn here. As it is now, what is there energy for? Mostly that would be sitting on the veranda in the sun reading, listening to birds, and enjoying the greenness and life. It doesn’t get much harder than that. Are things backing up on his computer, things that he has taken some responsibility for? Little by little I reel out a little energy here and there so that different tasks can be accomplished. The focus is that it is under my direction, that I, not he, am responsible. The first week I did not allow him to do anything outside of “our” work. This second week I allowed time and energy for several things. Everything took him at least twice as long as the “healthy” him would have taken. I reminded him that time did not exist and that if I chose to kill his body, none of this would be accomplished. Is he moving into a world where he takes on much less? Again, I am not going to tip my hat.

There is always a reason and perfection for everything that happens. Sometimes it is valuable for the individual to have an awareness of that reason. In this case with Michael we have nothing to say. Perhaps at some point We will say more, but we are not promising anything. What is there for him is to simply accept and trust the perfection of the now. The thought enters his mind, “What if this is still going on two years from now?” He looks at that and responds, “That is an interesting thought: Now, what’s here now?” Tomorrow does not exist.

Up until this moment we have been commenting only on Michael’s two-week sickness, not about anybody else. I would not tell anyone who is experiencing a physical disorder of some kind not to seek out relief or support. Follow your guidance. There is nothing wrong with amelioration of pain. Also it may be quite obvious why you are experiencing a certain ailment. Perhaps your guidance is telling you that you have been ignoring yourself to take care of others, and the sickness is a wakeup call to notice what your body wants. Sometimes sickness comes to tell you that you are too stressed and busy, that it is time to relax. There can be many wonderful messages that can come to you through a sickness. Please don’t let anything I have said discourage you from looking at what that might be. Again, I encourage each of you to do what you are guided to do. It is important that if it is someone else’s pain or discomfort you are concerned with, the guidance is still for you. You don’t receive another’s guidance. Even if this is your child, the fears are yours. The death confusion is yours. One of the misunderstandings around sickness is that the only satisfactory end is in a healing. Someone is diagnosed with cancer and they choose whatever treatment modalities they are guided to, whether from fear or from Spirit. For some it is considered a failure if the cancer does not go into remission. This is not acceptance of the perfection of the now. Part of the process of every sickness is full acceptance of what happens. Death fears may need to rise to the surface. Sooner or later you will all experience a physical death. If you surrender your fear around that now, you can live peacefully in the now with whatever presents itself. Without fear you are fully aware that there is no physical death; it is just illusion. If you are invested in a personal history, a past, a body, a future, and a continuing story, you will not want to lose that identity. You will fear that death and live in pain and suffering. Who you are simply is, with no attachment to any stories. When you realize that the game is not to be taken seriously, though it is to be played fully, you play whatever hand is dealt you.

Michael is aware that it is not his job to feel a certain way all of the time. However he feels, that is the gift for today – not wishing it were different, nor that he had more energy. Not even wishing that he felt up to cooking. Ultimately it all comes down to trusting your inner guidance. If you give your power away, whether to the medical establishment or to alternative healers, that is not following your guidance. They all have their agendas. It is unlikely that their thoughts encompass encouraging you to listen to your own inner voice. The doctor’s goal is to fight the disease and win. There is no place in that for accepting the perfection of the now. Again, there are no right or wrong answers. Your guidance may say to follow the medical model. Listen carefully to see if your choice is fear based, the hope that the expert will save you. You cannot be saved. You already are saved.

Good Now

Sanhia/Spirit

What part do my old relationships play in my awakening process?

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More likely than not, all your relationships could be called “old” relationships. You have a story about each one of them, from those recently formed to the ones you have had since childhood. More accurately, particularly with those bonds that are long standing, you have a multitude of stories. Within these narratives you define who that other person is to you: what they are like, what they provide for you, what you like and dislike about them, and the particular role or roles that you play in the relationship. You might be aware that you don’t seem to be the same person in each relationship. Perhaps you like the role you play with some acquaintances better than the person you find yourself to be with others, and so are more likely to seek them out so you can like yourself better.

Why do I call all relationships “old” and what does all of this have to do with awakening? Your natural state is to be awakened or absolutely in the now, taking nothing seriously as you are fully engaged with what is in front of you. In the now there are no old relationships. There is no history. If you are with another or even thinking about them, and you have any expectations based on stories or histories, you can know absolutely that you are not in the now. That means that you are asleep. You are not seeing the truth as it is. Your mind is creating scenarios about the other person and about yourself that have nothing to do with the truth of this moment. That’s what the ego mind does; it likes to create little dramas. What might it look like to be in the now with a relationship? We have talked recently about observing the observer. You have an observer who is looking at this relationship, at the other person, and at yourself, whoever this self is. It simply observes. Meanwhile your ego mind is making judgments based on what is observed. The truth of you, however, is the observer – not the analyzing mind.

It is not a question of needing to let go of old relationships that keep you stuck. Stuckness will then be created with any new relationship you attract, no matter how “spiritual” it might appear to be. It is also not a question of becoming a recluse and having no relationships, so there is nobody to create stories with. The ego mind will always find a substitute; you will find some place to project. Rather it is a question of stepping back to the observer, focusing on the noticing rather than your analysis of the noticed. As you are able to do this, you will see that every story you have about other people is false. If you are purely observing another from your true self, rather than from your analyzing mind, you will simply see their Divinity, and be absolutely in love with it.

This is a process that We invite you to play with in each and every relationship. It doesn’t matter if it is a relative or family member, a childhood friend, a longstanding friendship, an enemy, an old or present lover, a co-worker, a clerk in a store, a stranger you pass on the street, a celebrity you have never met, or a character from a movie, show, or book. This observing can be applied in the same way to every scenario. If you are in the physical presence of another person, recognize when you are doing more than just noticing. Pay attention to where there are any thoughts, expectations, judgments, likes or dislikes related to what is being observed with the other person. Just notice it. Be aware if a part of you wants the other to change in any way. Discern if you want to receive something out of the meeting. Notice that. In this awareness, the job is not to change yourself; it is not for you to stop having these thoughts. Just notice. If you have thoughts about changing your behavior, acknowledge that. Who is noticing? Your mind will likely keep active; your only job is to try to remember to recognize what you are doing.

By doing this you will, one by one, destroy every old relationship. These associations are based on stories. With them you tie yourself and the other up into specific positions and roles. The absolute freedom of the now is denied. Your behaviors and your perceptions are limited by these beliefs. In addition, your happiness likely is dependent on the other acting as you wish them to, leaving you upset much more often than you might wish. In the now there are no old fossilized relationships. Each moment is brand new. It has no history and is connected to no future. For some reason that is beyond the understanding of the mind, another person is brought into your presence. What a curiosity that is! Why? What is this all about? The only way to find out is to watch and see what happens. Whatever it is has never happened before and will never happen again. It is absolutely fresh. It is now! It matters not if this is a person you have never encountered before or a partner you have spent decades with. Let everything else go and allow yourself to experience this now.

A Course in Miracles reminds us that there is no order of difficulty in miracles. To the ego mind it feels more difficult to deal with the older relationships in the now, to hold them in a different way – particularly those with family. How do you view your parents, or your children? Most of you no longer live with your parents. One or both of them may no longer be living. With or without their physical presence, you still have a relationship with each of them. All you need do is to pull up the memory of an old story. You find yourself having a physical reaction, perhaps your heart beats faster or you are flooded with emotion, and all this with no physical presence. A parent may have done something that felt hurtful to you when you were seven years old. Now you are fifty and you pull the story up and feel hurt all over again. This certainly is not your first bout with this memory and will likely not be the last. Can you join me in appreciating the humor in the situation? Any outside witness could testify that your parent is not at the present moment doing anything to you. It’s just you doing it to you, while projecting blame on your possibly senile or dead mother. This is not living in the now. In the now you have no relationship with anybody who is not in your physical presence. But, since you already have the story pulled up, why not take a step back and watch it from your observer self. Look at it. Again, if there is any judgment or emotional response, that is not the watcher. Notice that. Who is noticing that? Keep stepping back to the watcher who sees the story, sees the child and the parent, and sees the adult replaying the whole scenario. The observer doesn’t take any of it seriously. This watcher doesn’t believe it is real or unreal. It doesn’t blame or take pity. It just notices.

For those of you who have such stories with your own children, let’s look at this from the viewpoint of your “home movies”. As they are growing up, your mind perceives all their vulnerable, fragile places. You feel a need to help them survive in the world with these deficiencies. Perhaps they are now adults, living on their own. These old stories keep being projected in your mind and you worry about them. Based on a story that was never true, but just a projection, you carry with you a constant pain. Then, just to add even more humor to the situation, your children probably react negatively toward this interference in their lives. They don’t want your story running their life. They may hide much of their life from you. The story keeps you from a now relationship with them, with another adult. As with the stories with your parents, notice all of this from the observer. A few laughs can usually be helpful in this process. Be aware of the fear, judgment, and guilt. Step back and watch from your observer self. You may be experiencing your noticer if you find yourself having feelings of absolute love for your family members. This love doesn’t worry about them and has no concern over whether you have done enough or done the wrong things. All that is experienced is a loving acceptance of what is.

This applies to every relationship. What stories are you still holding about any romantic relationship that broke off? Look at any specific groups of people. What stories do you hold about the other gender, about certain generations, about specific educational or intellectual levels, about financial status, about race or nationality, about religion or the lack thereof? The stories are endless that the mind creates. Each one locks you into a place where you are not free in the moment to truly be with others, whether in your thoughts or in their physical presence.

Having read all of this, you may still feel helpless in your ability to get to your observer self. How do you stop looking from the ego mind? You start by paying attention. If you simply stand still and accept all your mind stories, you will remain in the same cycle. Begin with a willingness to observe from your watcher self. It might sound trite, but where there is a will, there is a way.

There is a conundrum here. We are talking about a difference between Oneness and duality. You cannot hold the two simultaneously. The ego mind can only operate from duality. The truth of you can see only Oneness. How do you leap this chasm from duality to Oneness? The answer is that you can’t. The only thing you can do is to be aware when the ego mind is operating. You can notice that you are creating and operating from a story. Who is doing the noticing? That’s a good question to keep asking. You have no ability to control and change the mind that is creating stories, judging, and being overcome with emotions. Rather than futilely trying to become the noticer, you might ask yourself what qualities the noticer wouldn’t have. As you notice your mind or emotions acting in certain ways, ask if those are traits of your noticer. Ask if what you perceive is actually true. If you keep looking at these activities and are brutally honest with yourself the answer will eventually be no, these are not qualities of the observer. It is not possible for the noticer to change the noticed, nor would the noticer have any desire to do so. All that you can do is to slowly increase the frequency with which you are able to notice. At some point there may be a synaptic leap from duality to Oneness. You can’t make it happen any more than you can make a seed grow into a plant. You can nurture it through cultivation, but you can’t force it. At some point you may suddenly be fully aware of the absolute insanity and humor of the ego mind and stop using it.

Meanwhile, you have one simple job. Notice. You don’t have to change yourself, anybody around you, or the world. Just notice. There is no better place to focus this awareness than with your relationships, so that they can all become new relationships. Each meeting with another becomes like good improv theater, flowing with what presents itself, enjoying the spontaneity of the interchange, and allowing your guidance to carry you. There is no question of where it’s going, only an enjoyment of where it is.

Good Now

Sanhia/Spirit

How can I see the world through Spirit’s eyes?

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Often in the past, which of course does not exist, We have talked about the difference between how your ego perceives the world and how it is seen through the eyes of Spirit. You have been encouraged to learn how to do the latter. It is time to discuss this in a little different way. You are. You have no memory of not being nor can you conceive of a time in the future of not being. That is because you are. That is the truth of you. Anything you might add to that description is not the truth. You are not male/female, mother/father, worker/retiree, scholar/athlete, musician/artist, happy/sad, smart/stupid, brave/timid, or any other descriptor you might come up with. You simply are. Everything else is not the truth. When you look at the world and see yourself or others in specific roles, and evaluate, judge, set goals, or attempt to change what you perceive, that is all done through the eyes of your ego. Today let’s talk about looking through the eyes of Spirit.

The part of you that is notices what is there in front of you, whether that be the seeing of physical objects or people, or things perceived through the other senses of touch, smell, hearing, or taste. Using your senses, you notice everything around you. Nothing that crosses your awareness has any particular value of being better or worse than anything else, nor of having good or bad qualities. Whatever you perceive simply is a part of the world you are noticing. We will identify you as the noticer and whatever is perceived as the noticed. If you desire to see always through the eyes of Spirit, be the noticer. Simply notice what is in front of you. As soon as you label anything, whether it is through naming (for example calling something a chair), or qualifying (what a nice day), you have left behind noticing and are now evaluating, classifying, or separating. You are back to seeing through the eyes of your ego. You are now noticing the noticed instead of the noticer. Go back and notice the noticer. Be the noticer. Who is noticing?

That may feel like a very difficult thing to do because it is not your accustomed behavior. You haven’t been trained in this manner. Your education has always been to analyze and evaluate. When you begin those mental activities, you stop noticing. You make decisions as to the specific qualities the noticed appears to have. You decide that you know everything about that. Say you are sitting outside and watch a bird land on your lawn. Your ego mind wants to identify the species of bird, know what its habits are, be able to recognize its call, and find out about its diet, mating practices, and migration patterns. You may feel concerned that your cat will snare it or worry that it might have a hard time surviving winter, and think perhaps you should put out a feeder. The noticer, however, uses no names, does no thinking, and simply watches. This noticer has no thoughts that what is seen should be different in any way.

You may be thinking that this sounds like a pretty difficult thing to do. How can you possibly shut down this process that is always on, always busily at work judging, wanting to understand, and looking out for personal advantage?  Besides just being the noticer may sound boring. What kind of fun can you have just doing that, you might wonder, if you are not reacting to the world? Let me start with some motivation. If you think that you can ever truly understand anything, you are sadly confused. If you think you know something, you are wrong. If you think science has answers, science knows nothing. The individual you might consider to be the most brilliant person on the planet is an idiot. I am not picking on anybody here. Only the ego mind can “know”, and it is a mental cripple. Any truth that can be known by the noticer could never be explained in words. To know is to separate, divide, and label. As soon as you begin doing that you are seeing untruth, because the truth is all One, indivisible [under God for you Americans :)].

You say that you want to awaken. This can only be accomplished while looking through the eyes of the noticer. You notice through those eyes what is there. You can notice when you have stopped noticing the noticer and are now noticing the noticed. Notice that the ego has taken over again. The noticer has no horse in the race. It has no desire to change or reject any part of the illusion. It simply notices. Your ego thinks you have to accomplish something, go somewhere, or do something in order to awaken. You don’t awaken by doing something, but by stopping doing things. You stop paying attention to the noticed instead of the noticer. You stop placing attention and importance on the effect rather than the cause. Your job is to notice.  You are doing this all of the time. There is never a time when you are not noticing, but in the midst of your awareness you try to jump in and interact with and modify the noticed. You do this for whatever reason: to make it better, to protect yourself, to protect someone else, to deliver justice, to get revenge.  You stop noticing that you are noticing. Your job is now to notice what is transpiring, to notice that you are now identifying with the ego, with the noticed. Who is noticing that? Bring your focus back to the noticer. The ego mind wants to punish you for the transgression, to try to change and do better in the future. Notice that and go back to the noticer. You don’t need to change, Nothing is wrong. Just go back to noticing.

The noticer has no stories. They belong to the ego’s realm. The noticer is only aware of the now. You cannot see the past. Only the ego mind can hold stories from the past. In front of you is only the now. There is no future to be seen either. It is not in sight. Any projections of hopes or fears are only in the ego mind. The noticer is absolutely unaware of them. Neither past nor future can exist in the now.

How does one go about only noticing the noticer? The easiest way to explain this is to describe what is not part of the noticer; things that belong to the ego mind. The noticer does not have words: names, labels, thoughts or ideas. If you picture an infant looking at the world, lacking language, you can have some concept of what that might be like. You are simply observing what is there. There is no name for cat. There is no memory bank. There is no experience based expectation of how a “cat” might behave. You observe “black” but have no word for it. Those labels belong with the ego. The ego mind creates terms in order to separate. The ego may prefer black cats or, on the contrary, believe them to be bad luck. The noticer just sees what is there, thoughtlessly. Your ego mind will come in and attempt to interpret what is observed. No problem. Notice that. Notice that you are noticing the noticed instead of the noticer. If you judge yourself for analyzing, notice that that is also the ego. Notice that. If you are trying to understand, again the ego is taking over. Notice that. Think of a movie camera. All it does is record what is noticed. The download of what has been recorded includes no explanations, judgments, evaluations, or opinions. You only see and hear what the camera sees and hears. Your inner camera adds the other three senses, but smelling, tasting, and feeling also add no interpretive qualities. The sounds, sensations and tastes are not evaluated, simply noticed.

I encourage you to play with this. Take some time and notice the noticer noticing. Be very kind to yourself, recalling that the noticer never judges. Replace the self judgment with noticing. You will likely continue to notice your ego self analyzing, categorizing, comparing, classifying, dividing, or judging – that is fine. You noticed the activity. Now return to pure noticing. These things that you wish to achieve for yourself: spiritual awakening, peace, unconditional love, and being in the now – you may begin to experience when you are only noticing from the noticer and the ego is inactive.  There will be no past or future, just the glorious infinite now. There is nowhere to go to awaken; you notice that you are awake. There is no time. There is no illusion. You have always been and always will be awake. You have simply been pretending not to be. You have pretended to be your ego, separate from others, knowing something, having wisdom or knowledge, needing to defend and protect yourself, striving to fill your needs. This is what Jesus meant when he said that to realize the kingdom of heaven you must become as a little child; just observing, just noticing the now.

You may find some parallels with what I have been talking about and meditation, though in the latter you are often trained to close your eyes and shut out the world. You might have an intention in meditation: to calm yourself down, lower your blood pressure, find peace, become enlightened, draw things to you, or leave your body. Any of these things might occur as a result of observing, but only when that is not the intent. If there is intent, the ego is right there in the middle of it all. Again, the observer doesn’t have a horse in the race. There is no focus on changing anything. There is only noticing. Your ego mind screams out against this. It goes against everything you have been trained to do. It tells you that you should be active, doing, working, and focused. It asks what can be accomplished if all you do is just notice without any interaction whatsoever.

Obviously, it is not possible to stay in that absolute observing mode indefinitely and stay in a body. At some point you must eat, drink, move, and do something. There is also a reason why you appear to have a physical body. There is some action to be taken with that body. However, you don’t have a clue why you are here or what the purpose of your body is. You also don’t have the ability to figure that out. When you practice noticing the observer and let go of holding importance for the observed, you will be guided into action in the illusion. It may be in order to take care of your body. Your first job, however, is to notice the noticer, to let go of placing importance on the noticed, on your body, and the world around it. When you realize that, you are awake. There is nothing very special about it. It is the natural state. As you are focused on the observer you accept whatever is shown to you. There is no resistance. It simply is what is. You will feel a natural knowing as to what to do with each thing that comes into your awareness. You won’t know where it will lead or why you should do it, but life simply becomes an experience of playing with each gift that comes in that moment.

If your ego mind is telling you that you came here to make a difference, it knows neither what that difference is nor how to affect it. The observer flows gracefully with what is, doing exactly what is called for in that moment. We can say that in the endpoint of this dance, everyone realizes their observer. This Oneness cannot happen without you, nor can you stop it. Your part is to notice. In that noticing comes the end of suffering, not because you are noticing with that goal in mind – we have already pointed out the impossibility of doing that – but as the natural byproduct of being present. Notice that you are here.

Good Now

Sanhia/Spirit

Can I learn how to channel?

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The short answer to this question is yes, anyone can learn to channel. The first extension to that response comes in the form of another question. Why do you wish to channel? Let’s talk about what this channeling is. I would describe it as directly hearing Spirit’s Voice. It is your job as a human desiring to awaken to learn how to hear Spirit speak within you. That is everyone’s job, a task that you will all eventually master. It may or may not be your job to share that with others. That is none of your business. That is up to Spirit’s plan; it is My business. If you have a desire to be a channel for others, if that is a goal, know that that comes from the ego. That wish sprouts from the ego need to prove that your separate individual self has some special value. This stems from your imagined separation from God, your fear of God, and your hope that some specialness on your part might invite His forgiveness and that you could now be welcomed home. As we have mentioned many times before, all of this is absolutely crazy and unnecessary. The only separation that exists between you and God, between you and Divinity, between you and Heaven is in your imagination. Your return home is a consequence of your self-forgiveness, not any choice of God’s. If your intention is to channel – even if you were to have some success – the focus of the channeling would be to maintain the separation. Your ego mind is not capable of truly choosing to return home; it will always hold the illusion of separation. However, you can still set the intention to return home and ask Me to intervene. And if I wish to come through you as a channel as a part of your return, I will do just that.

Let’s take a little detour. Some people have approached Michael about their desire to channel as he does, perhaps channeling Me. They ask for guidance in doing this, or in some cases believe they can just step in and begin. I would like to tell you some of the story about the channeling I do through Michael. To begin with, this was an agreement made before Michael began the illusion of this incarnation, though he did not consciously remember this promise. However, I often whispered in his ear and he was open to the spiritual direction in which I was guiding him, though he was often quite confused and had no idea where it would lead. I exposed him to the idea of channeling through books about channels and books that were channeled. He became aware that some of the best information available was channeled, though certainly that was no guarantee of quality. I put him in the physical presence of people who were channeling. Nowhere through any of this did Michael have a conscious intention to channel nor did he have any belief that he was a person who could channel. Quite the opposite was the case; he did not consider himself to be intuitive or to be in possession of “psychic” abilities. What happened was that I continued to speak into his ear and he heard me without any idea where the voice was coming from and followed the guidance as it came. He took steps that the mass consciousness of the world considered as absolutely insane. He accepted, though not without resistance, what I brought to him. I don’t tell this story to in any way suggest that Michael is special. He was simply keeping his word with me, holding to – despite fears and uncertainties – the pact that he was barely conscious of, following a course that he was constantly surprised by.

I told Michael as much as he could receive at any given point. Though it sometimes felt to him  that it was a little bit too much, I only stretched but never broke him. I know exactly what is necessary at each stage. The stretching is required for there to be opening, for the awakening process to progress. When it was time to stretch him into an awareness that he was actually channeling – something that had felt to him to be just a conversation in his mind – I asked him if was willing to let me come through. He asked “Who?” I replied, “I think you know.” He responded, “Sanhia?” I never answered the question, but simply repeated, “Will you let me through?” Though he wasn’t absolutely certain I had answered his question, he assumed that I had and that allowed him to say, “Yes, but I don’t know how to do that”. And it went from there. At that time it was an enormous stretch for him to accept that he was channeling the ascended master Sanhia with the accompanying stories of the Apache lifetime where Sanhia ascended and his previous incarnation as the disciple Thomas in the Jesus lifetime. These stories were not actually true because none of the stories in the illusion are true, but they have their value. If I had said to Michael as we began our conscious channeling activity that this is Spirit speaking to you and through you, this is the Divine Voice, it would have been more than he could have handled. He had his hands full trusting that he was channeling Sanhia. In the beginning My message was diluted because Michael was not ready for the full power of God to come through. That time has passed. It is time to come fully out of the closet. This is and always has been the Voice of Spirit. You may continue to refer to me as Sanhia. It makes no difference. This is the voice of Spirit coming to you. As I speak, Michael doesn’t exist. There is only this Divine Voice guiding you home, a beacon, a lighthouse. I am speaking in this manner through Michael because he agreed to it and has now fully surrendered to allowing My expression. That is his job. He is happy to do it. He performs this task, now, fearlessly. He has no other function and is aware of that.

This is something that is there for each one of you. I am constantly speaking to each of you. You have the choice to listen or not (as you have done for lifetimes). There is no problem if you can’t hear me within yourself. Ultimately you will. If you are hearing/listening to what I am saying, you have the choice to follow or not. Channeling ultimately entails the willingness to listen and the courage to follow, nothing more, nothing less. This does not mean that you will operate in the way that Michael does. You will be led to your unique expression. I will use you to touch others, as you are being touched now. How that will be is none of your business. That is My job. Your job is only to surrender, to allow yourself to be led. Any fear you have of surrendering and to giving up the idea that you know what to do comes from the ego. This is not a battle between Me and your ego. There can be no conflict between truth and illusion. As you listen to and accept truth, illusion simply disappears. As you develop your ability to channel me and to follow my guidance, the voice of ego will grow dimmer and dimmer.

The form that the communication with me will take will vary for each of you. For some of you it may be more visual or using other senses than the verbal. What will be consistent for all is that the message you receive will pass the test of truth. If anything that you are receiving is fear provoking or causes pain or a feeling of separation, it is not fully Me you are channeling. This is not to say that you won’t ever have fear about following the guidance. At any rate offer the fear or confusion up to Me and ask for help in seeing the truth. That truth is always centered in the absolute and unconditional love of God, in the Divine. It is always about your total innocence, that you have done nothing wrong and could not do anything wrong. There is never anything to forgive. You are the Divine Child of God. When My Voice reaches you, it will reinforce all of that. Anything outside of that is not My Voice. Ask Me to lift you up so that We can look down at the illusion together and see the truth. My guidance will always lead you to your next step.

None of this matters. None of the experiences you are having have any value, except as support in your awakening process. If you think anything does matter, ask for support in seeing that it doesn’t, and in seeing what does. You all will become channels of love and truth through Me. It can be no other way. Let go of any thought that it should appear in a certain way or at a particular time. Release any thought that you should be a “channel” for others and simply channel the messages that are for you. I will take care of everything else.

Good Now

Sanhia/Spirit

Can you give us some inspiration?

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It is always fun to take different approaches, to look at things in different ways. Sometime during the past year we looked at the question of whether forgiveness is still important and we have also spent some time in the past talking about old stories. I want to revisit those themes today, but I wish to throw into the mix a couple of examples of individuals who have given absolute and full commitment to their awakening processes through addressing these two techniques.

Let’s start by taking a look again at stories. Everyone has their stories. It might be one about your upbringing and how it has affected you. It could be a tale of your unfair treatment at the hands of a friend or an employer. Maybe it is a story about who you think you are (or are not), about your strengths, or weaknesses. Your saga likely contains descriptors concerning your gender, nationality, race, age, religion, or political party or beliefs. These all might be a part of your story or, better stated, your stories. The only thing you can be absolutely certain about with your history is that it is not true. It does not represent either the truth of you or the truth of the world. These memories are all fantasies, illusions. It is not my purpose today to go into more detail about why these are illusions. If you would like to explore more about stories and dealing with them you might want to read this message.

Stories are absolutely connected with forgiveness. In your story, particularly if it is not an absolutely happy one, there are some “bad guys” and a “victim”; the latter is likely you. If you believe the story to be true, forgiveness becomes nearly impossible. You are trying to forgive something that never happened, to undo a wrong that was never committed. The forgiveness process is then primarily a task of recognizing that you are holding an untruth and letting it go. Whatever it is you incorrectly perceived as happening to you was a projection of your own guilt. The “other” has nothing to do with it. The forgiveness process has only to do with yourself, and you are innocent; there is nothing to forgive. As long as you hold on to the untruth that you did something that requires forgiveness, or had something done to you, that requires forgiveness, you will never get there. You have simply judged yourself for no reason, thinking a story was true.

What I want to do now is to provide you with a little inspiration in the form of two very different models coming from different paths who likely awakened through the process of releasing stories and through forgiveness. The first one may be familiar to some of you. His name is, or was, Bill Thetford. In his story, he was a highly educated and successful clinical psychologist and the head administrator of the hospital connected with Columbia University in New York. The reason you might be familiar with him is that he, along with his employee Helen Shucman, was responsible for the scribing of A Course in Miracles. For seven years they worked in secret with this project. The information came as an absolute surprise to them though they had asked for another way to live with the chaos of their professional world. Though the pair was fully committed to completing the transmission of the material, they were otherwise usually at each other’s throats. Bill and Helen completed the process and then drew to them those who would help edit and then release the book to the world. At this point Bill chose to retire, to leave the intellectual confines of New York where he had lived for 25 years, and to move to a more relaxed scene in California.

Bill had chosen to become a full time student of the Course, perhaps its first. At the same time, Helen said that she could not do that. Bill moved alone to Tiburon, north of San Francisco, finding himself mostly surrounded by Course students. He began to work with the forgiveness process. Bill had a lot of work to do. His life had never been spiritually focused and he had innumerable stories to clean up. After five years of fairly intensive focus, he chose to move to an even more relaxed and supportive community near San Diego. Now, nothing else mattered but letting go of all judgments, all blame. He focused on everybody from his former life. Bill was relentless in clearing the slate with all, with taking full responsibility, with forgiving himself. He made contact with some people from his past stories and apologized for his former behavior. Those who knew him during this period reported that he became more playful, happy, fun-loving and egoless. Bill completed that process and then in one moment on one day he left his body. The world perceived a physical death, but the doctors reported it as being painless and instantaneous. Bill spent ten years with this process. He pretty much started from scratch. Though he had spent ten years helping to bring the Course to the world, his work did not really start until he retired.

The second example is quite different, though he did share with Bill similar professional work being a doctor of psychiatry. Hew Len was a Hawaiian and a practitioner of an ancient island spiritual tradition called Ho’oponopono which teaches, among other things, taking personal responsibility for everything in one’s environment. Dr. Len began a job as the psychiatrist in a hospital for the criminally insane. Most of the inmates were locked up all day because of their violent tendencies. These were men who were not deemed to be sane enough to stand trial for their crimes. The staff he inherited had low morale, with many sick days being taken. On his first day Dr. Len greeted his staff, entered his office, closed his door, and did not emerge until the end of the day. He repeated this behavior daily while the staff grumbled about their lazy and incompetent new boss. But here is what went on behind closed doors. Hew’s office had a filing cabinet containing records on all the inmates. He began by pulling out the first file and reading everything concerning the man’s biography, diagnosis, and offenses. When he had a reaction to any information in a file, he took responsibility for it, realizing he could only see things that were his projection. Hew’s job was to work with his own personal forgiveness on the issue until no judgment remained for the inmate. He would proceed in this manner until he finished the file. Then he would go on to the next file and the one after that, eventually going through the entire filing cabinet. He did no one-to-one counseling. The staff meanwhile was going nuts, but here is what began to slowly transpire in the hospital. One-by-one, patients began to become less violent. Not as much medication was required. The inmates were able to spend more time out of their cells, being allowed into the common rooms. Staff morale began to rise. Workers reported greater job satisfaction. The patients began to be released, deemed to no longer be insane nor threats to society. After a couple of years the hospital was closed; there were not enough patients remaining to justify its continuance.

You may be sitting there saying to yourself, “Sure. How could that possibly happen?” This is the power of absolute forgiveness. This could come about only because in his heart of hearts, Dr. Len knew that only agape love is real and all else is illusion. He refused to entertain the falseness of his projections, choosing instead to be fully responsible for them, shedding the untruths for the underlying Divine love. His unconditional self love spread to all those in the institution, patients and staff alike. They did not even need to be in direct contact with Hew to feel his energy. It was not his job to heal his patients, but to heal himself. The most selfless thing you can do is to take care of your own process. In doing so you cannot help but to touch everyone around you.

So these are two stories. As you are choosing whether or not to make this kind of forgiveness the centerpiece of your life, I want to remind you that no story is in the now. They are all from the past, and the past isn’t real. When you hold on to a story, however that might manifest – non-forgiveness, blame, victimhood – you are living an illusion. You are not experiencing the now. Whatever happened in that story is not happening now, unless you bring it into your now. What these two individuals did was to notice when they were tracking mud on their carpet, to be aware when they were bringing in old stories and acting as if these were actually part of their now. Your job in the forgiveness process is to be absolutely present. In the now there is nothing to forgive. Even if somebody were to walk up to you and hit you in the eye – though you might have an immediate response of pain, anger, judgment, or desire for revenge – it is now, now. That event took place in the past. It has become a story. Actually it always was a story. It is all your creation. As you are able to release the story, everything surrounding it dissipates: the pain, the anger, the judgment, and the desire for revenge. It will be as if it never happened. And it never did. Don’t take my word for this. Try it out for yourself. How valuable would one punch in the eye be if it led to your awakening, if it supported you in always being in the now, in living fearlessly? What if it taught you to always take responsibility and to know that everything that happens is perfect?

All that you need to do is to start with one person and one story. Stay with that story until you have fully assumed responsibility and forgiven yourself. Stay with that person until no stories are left, until you have released them from all blame and judgment, until all projection has ended, until you accept the untruth of the story and have only gratitude for its part in your awakening. You will probably be ready to move on to another person to continue the process. Enjoy!

Good Now

Sanhia

How do you define yourself?

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Today’s question, rather than being one that is asked of me, is one I wish to ask of you. The question is “How do you define yourself?” If your only answer is that you are a divine, eternal, unconditionally loved and loving, infinitely creative child of God – and that is all that ever comes into your mind when you think about who you are, that is fantastic…..and you can stop reading now and enjoy your oneness with God. There may be other ways that you see yourself that seem to stand in the way of realizing personal divinity, even if you have been making efforts to see the truth. For example, you might define yourself by some traumatic event that has come into your life, which was painful when it happened and you cannot forget about it or let go. Perhaps you tell this story to others, maybe often, and/or it regularly comes up in your thoughts (click for an introductory message about “old stories”). These are places where you allow yourself to believe in your separation from God. Rather than one traumatic event, there may be a painful pattern you have noticed in your life, perhaps dealing with money, relationships, deservedness, loneliness, or lovableness.

There are two things I wish to say concerning these things you hold about yourself. The first I have already mentioned. You define yourself by these issues. This is part of who you believe yourself to be. That’s why you relate these stories to others. It gives your fearful ego self a boost to have others understand what you have been through, and to receive some compassionate thoughts from them. Some of these identities you have carried for so long that it is difficult to imagine yourself without them. Not only is letting them go difficult, it is fear provoking. Who would you be without this story? An example of this is a parent who has lost a child, who thinks they can never recover from this and will never be the same again. Another example could be the belief that you were shaped by how your parents raised you. A third could be that money is always a struggle for you. Whatever your story is, it defines you.

I mentioned there were two things I wished to say. The second is to remind you that your story is not true; it is a fiction. It is a movie that you are acting out a role in. You are pretending to be a victim of some event or series of events. It simply is not true. What is actually there for you is an enormous gift. Whatever you see as an anchor weighing you down in your life is a blessing from Spirit. Whatever limiting, fear provoking message this event is telling you is something you came in with in this body. Out of the fear you brought with you, you created the event. You didn’t do this to punish yourself. It was part of your pre-planning for this lifetime. You created this to overcome the false beliefs and separation from God that you have carried through all your incarnations. You are presented with these enormous gifts so that you can choose to overcome. There is no real consequence to holding on to the story, other than your continued pain and suffering in this body and the next and the next, until you decide to let this illusion go. God doesn’t care how long you hold onto it. He doesn’t see your story. He sees only your perfection. God can only see what is real, which is the loving, divine you.

If you want to take the bull by the horns, if you want to be proactive – make a pact with yourself. First, become aware of these limiting definitions that are less than divine. Notice the stories you tell yourself and others. Agree to stop telling them. If one comes into your awareness, do the five-step process. Now, look at the fear connected with this story until it transforms. Let go of the hopelessness of feeling that you will have the story with you forever, and look it right in the face. The reason that you cannot seem to get away from it is because it is your creation. It will follow you wherever you go until you confront it and let it dissolve. It is not real, but until you look at it and feel it fully and completely without backing down, it will feel real. This is not a work that anybody else can do for you. In fact you will likely react angrily toward anybody who would try to help. That would probably be too frightening. You need to be in control here. The action is to come from you. You are to admit that you have chosen to be a victim. Nothing has happened to you. It is 100% voluntary. Because you have chosen the “old story”, you can unchoose it. The truth is that only things that are real can stay forever.

Something that can assist you in being proactive with this “old story” is to change it in your mind. Ask your guidance to show you how this “old story” has already been a blessing for you or how it could be seen in that light. For example, if you have had a severe financial crisis in your life, you might now recognize that you have survived the “worst possible thing” and no longer have the same fears about money. If you have a parent who you felt treated you in an abusive way, you could thank them for doing such a loving thing because it forced you to find your strength within you, to love yourself instead of looking for approval from others. There is always a true story in the gift presented by each piece of this identity you have given yourself. Ask for support in finding the truth of the benefit from each situation. Now you can burn your candle at both ends. At one end you face and transform your fear. At the other end you see the event as a blessing. Develop the habit of doing both of these things until you notice your fear evaporating and everything being a blessing for you. There is no reason or need for you to continue to suffer or be a victim any longer, absolutely none. Nor is there any judgment if you continue to do so, absolutely none. You are free. Choose as you will. Go in peace.

God Blesses You

Sanhia