Can you give a few more hints on how to go about finding the truth?

In the last message we talked about what you can trust and about finding the truth. I gave you some hints as to how to go about finding the absolute truth. As I say this, I want to remind you that this is a work you must do yourself. I cannot hold your hand through your internal investigation, nor can anyone else. It is your job to do, or not. But, I have been asked if I can’t, please, give just a few more hints to help guide the way. I’m a nice guy, so I say, “Sure, I can do that.” I want to begin by suggesting that it is not so much a search for the truth as a dedication to realizing untruth. When you finish the job of untruth realization all that can remain, if you have done a good job, is truth. You find truth through the process of elimination, the releasing of untruths. The hints I will give to you are designed to help you do just that.

Probably the biggest thing that gets in the way of releasing untruths is they seem to be connected with things that you want to be present in your life. You have resistance to seeing the untruth because it might require letting go of something you would rather hold on to, something that provides some comfort in the midst of your pain. Your ego is never going to make it easy to wake up. Because you are giving importance to these things, the illusion becomes more important than the truth. The illusion is built upon untruths. Let’s look at what some of these things might be.

We could start by listing three categories of untruth encouragers found in the illusion. The first one we will simply call stuff. Think about how much of your time and energy goes into dealing with your stuff, your material possessions. The time you spend dealing with your stuff is time you are not spending with untruth realization. It’s a diversion. You think about stuff you have right now. You think about stuff you want to have. Maybe you think about stuff you used to have. There are numerous ways that you have to deal with your stuff. Stuff breaks down. Your stuff stops working. Spirit has brought in planned obsolescence so stuff breaks down faster and faster. Now you have to deal with fixing it or having somebody else do that for you. Maybe it’s time to buy newer stuff. In the meantime you have to figure out how to live your life without that particular stuff. Maybe, you decide one day that you need the latest model of your stuff, because yours is outdated and not good enough anymore. When you get new stuff you have to figure out how to operate it. All your stuff requires attention. It may need cleaning, maintenance, and protection against the elements and from theft. You worry about your stuff. You alter your behavior for your stuff. So much of your energy, your time, and your mind are devoted to handling your stuff. If you want to be dedicated to untruth realization, that will require plenty of space in your life. Having less stuff can free up this time. This can be part of your process. When you realize that a piece of your stuff is demanding a lot of time or is adding to the stress in your life, you can look at the truth of your need for the object. Follow that line of thinking all the way to the end. I am not suggesting you live your life as an ascetic monk with no stuff. I am not telling you not to do that either. If you really wish to wake up, to release the untruths that you believe in, you will not be able to avoid looking at the addictions you have to the stuff in your life. You will also find yourself dealing with the fear that you might lose any or all of your stuff.

The second category is people. Do I want you to let go of all the people in your life? I neither suggest adding or subtracting people from your life, but untruth realization will require you to examine the attachments you have to your relationships. Like your stuff, your relationships require maintenance and time. How do you alter your behavior because of the people around you? This is a profound question to pursue. You will find it nearly impossible to realize untruths while hoping to obtain approval or agreement from those around you. How much of what you choose to do, how much of how you spend your time is determined by what the people around you seem to want from you (realizing that this is often your projection)? The implication may be that if you are really my friend or if you really loved me…..you would do what I ask of you. Do you fill your life with people so you don’t have to look at your mind? Is it a way of keeping busy? Is it your fear of being alone? This aloneness is exactly what is required of you to have the space for untruth realization. If you really wish to let go of untruths, it can only be accomplished by going deep within your own mind. Talking to or being with others will not help; that can only stand in your way. Part of your process will be dealing with the fear that you might lose any or all relationships.

If you truly focus on truth/untruth it will come ahead of the people, the friends, the family, the stuff, the money…..everything. This is some serious shit we’re talking about. Again, it’s fine if you admit to yourself that you are not ready for that kind of commitment. It’s okay to just play around with these ideas without jumping off the cliff. But, I am talking to those of you who do want to get that serious. Let’s talk about the third category…..goals. What goals do you have for your life? What do you hope to achieve? What do you want to have success with? What do you wish to accomplish? What do you want to be known for? What experiences do you wish to have? What do you hope to realize? All of these goals stand in the way of your untruth realization…..unless your goal is untruth realization. There is a saying attributed to Jesus that I’m almost embarrassed to repeat here because it is used often. However, it is used so often because it resounds of truth. Here we go, “You can only serve one master”. You can serve the illusion or you can serve the truth. The illusion is not true. Yes, you seem to be living with it and need to deal with and find your peace with it, but it is not true. If you want to know the truth, the focus cannot be on the illusion. You can only serve one of these. They are mutually exclusive. Pick one or the other. If you choose truth, then stuff, people, and goals go out the window, down the toilet, or wherever you get rid of things. Am I suggesting you have to get rid of absolutely everything? Take one thing at a time and look at it. Find the truth or untruth about it. You cannot be in a body without stuff, people, and goals. The question is one of function. Are they there to serve your awakening, or are they there to try to make the illusion more fun and to shield you from the harsh glow of truth?

What happens as you release the excess stuff, people, and goals from your life is you clear the decks so that you deal with what really matters, untruth realization. The process is very simple. Whatever thought or feeling comes to you, ask yourself if it is really true. Follow your thoughts about this down the rat hole and through the maze until you find its untruth.  If you haven’t found the untruth, you haven’t followed far enough. Perhaps it’s time to make a minor revision in the saying, “Find the truth and it will set you free” to “Find the untruth and it will set you free”. These thoughts and feelings that arise are likely to be connected to the stuff, people, and goals that you are in the process of relinquishing. Let’s say thoughts arise about your car. It is not the car that is the issue; it is the thoughts and feelings you have about the vehicle. What is the purpose of your car? Let’s play with this a little. Does your car make you feel better about yourself? Will others think better about you because of the car you have (or worse)? Is that really true? Does the possession of an object change who you are? If you didn’t have that car, would you be someone else? Who are you? Is who you are affected by how others think about you? Do they have the power to affect the truth of you? Who would you be if you didn’t (or did) have a car? Would your experience of the illusion change with a change of vehicles? What is necessary in order for you to maintain your existence in the illusion, for example, getting food, doing the work you are here to do, meeting with people that it is important to get together with? How would this affect all the different things you do while in a body? How important is each of them? What absolutely needs to be done? If a car is found to be necessary to continue your untruth realization, what kind of car will suit you? These answers are not outside; they are within you. Nobody can tell you what kind of car will satisfy your needs; at best they can project what they believe would suit them. We have just scratched the surface of all the possible roads this car question might lead you down. On the one hand you can look at the amount of your energy that is consumed by your mode of transportation while on the other hand ask why any of that matters. As you investigate fully you will come face to face with looking at the actual importance of everything you have held to be of value. If the bottom line is that only untruth realization is important, how will this piece of stuff help you get there? Where is it in the way and where does it support? You will only know these answers through relentless self examination.

This is only one of a multitude of possessions that you might have. This process of untruth realization will take you quite a while. If you seriously look for your answers, you won’t have so much time to spend with other people and you probably wouldn’t provide the best company. You won’t have time to be dealing with all of your stuff. You won’t be able to accomplish your goats while trying to figure out if they are worth reaching or even having. This is why Jesus is also quoted as saying that, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven”. You can only serve one master. If riches are important to you, you will hold to them rather than surrender them for the truth within you. You cannot pay attention to your stuff and to the people who look after your stuff and still have enough time to follow your thoughts all of the way to the end. That will be even less likely if you suspect that untruth realization will lead you to give up all attachments to your stuff. There is nothing evil in stuff; it is only the addiction to it that causes a problem. Does more stuff really give you power? Does it free you? Do your relationships support you in untruth realization or do they enable you to hold on to prejudice and victimhood? When you are afraid of the truth, you attract those equally committed to untruth to join together in protecting your right to ignorance, to spiritual childhood. No matter how many goals you reach, you will never feel you are fully a success. What success brings is an emptiness that can only be filled by striving for another goal. Accumulating money or stuff leaves you still wanting more. There is never enough of anything in the illusion to fully satisfy you. No matter how many friends you might feel you have, you know inside that they don’t love the real you. It’s all conditional and you have to maintain a façade just to hold onto what you don’t even really have. Stuff, people, and goals are drugs. They are addictions. A drug can be used in an appropriate way to support you in untruth realization, but addiction never does that. You can serve untruth realization or your addiction, but not both.

This is where the pedal hits the metal. The more dedication you have to untruth realization/truth realization, the more time and energy you will focus there and the less important the addictions will be in your day to day life. Everyone hopes to be able to have their cake and eat it too, but it doesn’t work that way. I’m here to rain on your parade. There isn’t room to hold on to the illusion and grasp for the truth simultaneously. There is a moment where you will have to let go of the illusion but will not have yet fully grasped the truth. The bottom falls out from beneath you. There is nothing left to hold on to. This has been called the dark night of the soul. I wish I could tell you differently, that your transition to truth will be a smooth ride. Everyone fears facing this abyss. Addiction feels like a safer, more comfortable place. This is part of the package. In the illusion you believe you need to fulfill the three categories to be happy, but they will never bring you there. They can’t because they are not built upon truth. Only untruth realization can bring you what you desire to experience. If you maintain your commitment, you will move through the dark night into real freedom. You will know when it is time for you to make the choice for untruth realization. Maybe it’s not meant for this trip. Eventually you will find yourself there. Bon voyage.

God Blesses You

Sanhia

Why is it so difficult to let go of the illusion of the world?

Most people have this experience – we could call it schizophrenia – where on the one hand they understand the spiritual truth of pure non-dualism on a mental level; they read these messages and have read and studied A Course in Miracles – perhaps multiple times. That side of them believes in the truth of oneness with Spirit and with God and correspondingly disbelieves in the ego and the reality of the physical world. Yet when it comes to the push and shove of daily life, they seem to live in another world.  There appears to be such a split. They ask, “Why, Sanhia, is it so hard for me to live the truth? Why do I know that it is all a dream, and yet take the dream so seriously and get upset and angry, am filled with judgment, pain hurt, fear, and feelings of victimhood. I know it’s not real, but I am still overwhelmed by all of these feelings! Why Sanhia? Why? Can you help me?” I can’t help you because there is no problem here. I hope you are laughing with me now. You are just being human and cannot be expected to be behaving any differently.

There is a term that psychologists use that goes back to Freud called dissociation. Freud also talked about projection, where people assign their own self judgments to others so that they can live with themselves (though probably not so happily). Jesus also told us all about this phenomenon. Dissociation can be described or explained in the following way: you want to change your life, to change your experience of things, to give up all of the pain and suffering and to implement a new plan; but a part of you disconnects from that new plan and does the same old thing. You sabotage your own strongly desired program. The old story simply continues to run your life with all of the old pain and suffering included. Even though you consciously say that you don’t want this, you keep doing it. That is dissociation; that is schizophrenia. In therapy, you have decided on a course of treatment, but you don’t seem to be able to carry it out. In spiritual healing, you decide to listen to Spirit instead of the ego, but the ego keeps running things.

Why would anybody do that? Why would they act against their own self interest? The short answer is, “because the ego made me do it”. A slightly longer version is that it is more comfortable to keep choosing the ego. It could be said that the known devil is preferable to the unknown devil. So far you have all survived while listening to the ego. It may have been painful, but it is familiar. It is comfortable like your old clothes. A big part of you doesn’t want to let go of that. And…what is this unknown? What would you be letting go of the ego for?

Before answering that question, let’s take a giant step backwards. As a child you often felt pretty helpless in a hostile world. Your protection was to build a wall and hide behind it. You didn’t let anybody penetrate that wall. In your private world you were an innocent victim of your parents, teachers, siblings, neighborhood bullies, and whoever else seemed to be more powerful than you. You blamed them for your troubles, and forgiveness was out of the question. The truth behind your wall and behind everybody’s walls was that you were terrified of God. This fear felt too dangerous to face, so you hid it, even from yourself. In this way you could pretend that God would take pity on you and punish those who were so harsh to you. The only problem was that none of that was true. You now have the spiritual awareness of why it wasn’t true and why it ultimately wouldn’t work for you then, or now. But, you also have this habit, and it seems to have kept you alive.

So, you are not just letting go of the ego; you have to tear down this entire wall that has seemed to protect you, though at an increasingly high cost.  And what are you getting in exchange?  You are willing to give up the pain, the fear, the suffering, the anger, the judgment, and the victimhood. You will also be giving up your personal identity, which is absolutely tied up in all of this. For you to fully release the illusion, you will have to fully release your attachment to your separate identity. This is fertile ground for the ego to grab hold of. Are you sure you are ready to do that? To become one with God and Spirit it is necessary to lose your uniqueness, to lose your sense of self, this sense of you. That is what letting go of the ego entails. What you do then, unconsciously of course, is to keep a foot in each camp. On the one hand you keep your spiritual disciple going through reading, studying, affirming, and asking Spirit for support. On the other hand you keep one foot firmly planted in the ego’s camp, holding on to your specialness and that of others. So you have your support group of people you judge as specially good and the opposition group which is specially bad. You have special love and special hate. You hold that for yourself as well. You tell yourself all of the things that make you a special person: you are on a spiritual path, you recycle and care for the environment, you are against war, and you try to help the disadvantaged, and so on. You pat yourself on the back for being good. Then your special hate for yourself surfaces and you judge yourself for failing to be perfect with your spiritual practice, for not eating well enough, for losing your temper, for catching yourself judging, and so on. So you bounce back and forth between being so enlightened and being such an asshole who will never get it.

Boy does ego like all of this back and forth crap. If you choose Spirit you have to let go of it all, the special hate and the special love. This is enormous. It is bigger than your separated mind can even hold on to. That’s how big it is. The fear is gargantuan. There is no way that you can survive it. Sanhia! What are you saying?  I mean that you as a separated, individual self cannot survive. If you let go of the ego comfort zone and pull that foot out of the game you will leave your personal identity and fall back into the oneness of God. Sooner or later you will have to do this, but right now you are driving with a heavy foot on the brakes. The only choice you have is for how long and how slowly you want to rip that bandage off. The fear is usually way too big to rip it all off at once. For one thing you have no idea how long the bandage is, nor how many hairs will have to be ripped out. Beyond that, you have no idea what replaces the bandage and the accompanying pain. You know what a separate self feels like, but oneness can feel like it might be an endless void. You have no conception of what the experience of “no you” is like.

Spirit demands nothing. You will never be forced to come home. Spirit knows that of course you dissociate. Of course you try to maintain your separate self. That’s what humans do. No problem. There is nothing you have to do about it. You are not wrong to continue, nor are you right to stop. But since you do want to listen, Spirit whispers to you to notice that you dissociate. Then Spirit suggests that you have a willingness to look right at the areas where you have a special hate toward yourself or others. If you say to me that you don’t have any hate for anybody, I suggest you are dissociating. It is fear provoking to admit your hate and judgment. Everybody in a body carries hate. It goes with the territory. You hate yourself for separating from God or you project that hate onto God for abandoning you. The fear is that if the hate is exposed, God will punish you. That is an insane thought, expecting something God is not capable of. But, if you pretend it is not there, you can’t deal with it. It remains hidden behind your wall and you stay in the hell of separation. Part of dissociation is pretending you are healed when you are not, pretending that you don’t have a problem. The ego here might suggest to you that since the problem isn’t real, there is no reason to look at it. But, you believe it is real. So, look right at it.

You look at it, not because you have a work that you have to do to transform this fear, but simply in recognition that you have a judgment. Recognize that you have this judgment, this anger, this hate; you recognize that you feel you are a victim, that you blame this person, that you blame yourself, and on and on. Just notice that you are doing that. Bring that to me. Bring that to Spirit. We’ll look at it together. That’s all you have to do. When you look at what is not real side-by-side with what is real, only the truth will eventually remain. The fear will disappear, will evaporate, will be burned away. This is like the second step in the five-step process. Love and fear cannot long occupy the same space. Do this throughout the day. Whenever you notice yourself experiencing any of the aforementioned manifestations of fear and separation, don’t try to hide or ignore what you are feeling or believing. On the other hand, don’t accept it in helpless self hatred. Look right at it and invite me, invite Spirit in at that moment. Ask us to look at it with you. Let go of the judgment and just look with us. This can be called “looking down upon the battlefield”. We will see you acting from this dispassionate viewpoint. We will remind you of your innocence and that you are unconditionally loved. As we watch together, you will become aware that you are the only one judging, and will realize there is no benefit to you from continuing, but plenty to gain from loving yourself. The fear is too great to face alone. Fortunately, you are never alone. You are always welcome to come join with us. Welcome us in. Invite us to gently shake you and to point out when you are dissociating. Allow us to remind you that it is safe to bring those judgments out into the open with us.

God Blesses You

Sanhia

How can I be a better parent?

Last time we talked about the relationship you had with your parents, about taking responsibility for all that happened and forgiving them and yourself. If you have not taken these steps, you will likely find yourself repeating your childhood with your own children. For those of you who do not have children, this projection will take place with others for whom you act as an authority figure, though the impact is usually stronger and more focused with your own children.

Most people have very idealistic thoughts about their children and how they will raise them. You tell yourself you are not going to be like your mother or your father; you will bring them up in a different way. You may consider the best techniques to use with your offspring so that they don’t have to go through what you had to endure. The truth is that if you haven’t healed with your parents, you will find yourself becoming your parents as you are in the midst of bringing up your children. They will constantly frustrate you. It hardly seems fair – first your parents controlled and frustrated you, and now your children are doing the same thing. What kind of world is this? The illusion, again, is that you have the responsibility as a parent to turn out the perfect child, when in actuality it doesn’t matter what you do as a parent. It truly doesn’t. This does not mean that I am encouraging you to beat or sexually abuse your children, but it doesn’t make a difference for them. It does make a difference for you. Whatever you send out to another is what you believe that you deserve, and will therefore receive. However, the truth of them is not harmed. If that is what they seem to receive from you, it is their creation. They will deal with it however they deal with it, as you did with your parents.

Your children came in with their egos fully formed and are creating what they need to have in their classroom to help them wake up to their divinity. They chose you as their parent. Your basic job is to see that they survive childhood – that they are fed, clothed, housed, physically protected, and adequately educated. It is not your job to make sure they excel as students or have perfect behavior, whatever that might be. If they survive childhood, you have done a wonderful job. Even if they don’t, you have done the best you could. If you manage not to project your fears upon them, that is just gravy. Again, your children are the creators of their experience, not you. You are just a tool. If you want to do more than the basics and provide some of that gravy, the best way of doing that is to heal with your parents. Remember, if you still hold yourself as being a victim to your parents, you will create being a victim to your children. You will perceive your children as victims, too. You will worry about them, about what the world is doing to them. You will judge them for their weaknesses and fear for their future. In short, you will treat them as you treat yourself.

What you teach your children does not come from your words, but from your example. If you are coming from unconditional love, they will receive that no matter what your words or actions might be. They always have the choice to reject or misinterpret you, but loving them anyway gives them more space to choose love themselves. If through your living example your children are shown that you are never a victim to anything, you could not do more as a parent. Of course, this includes not being a victim to being a parent. If your children get the message of the parental role being one of martyrdom – that you have had to make so many sacrifices in order to be a good parent – you have put an enormous guilt load on your children’s shoulders. That’s okay; it was a lesson they apparently needed to deal with, but it leaves you feeling a failure, feeling defeated.

But this message is not about your children, it is about you. Where you have judgment about your children and want to change them – that is the place you are not accepting yourself. Thank your children for being your teachers. Herein lies the crux of this message. There is no true hierarchy among you and your children. You, they, and everyone else are just human. You are all divinity pretending not to be divine, trying to wake up. Just because your child is in a smaller, more physically vulnerable body – as you were once upon a time – does not mean they are not your peer. Yes, it is your role to help them survive to adulthood, not because you are more evolved, but simply because you are physically mature. So thank your children for being your teachers, and learn from them. Seek the place where you have no judgment.

One of the biggest confusions that a parent can act on is to demand some kind of love from their children. When you demand love from anybody else, silently or overtly, it comes from a place of not loving yourself. You have denied yourself God’s love, even though it is always there. You have separated yourself from it, pretending it is not there. You seek human love to replace divine love, but that can never work. When you don’t believe that God loves you unconditionally, you create the world from that mindset. You are unlovable. It is not possible for anyone to fill that void, least of all your children. How can they love you when they are dependent on you? Can you truly love your boss or the policeman who just pulled you over?

Another thing that happens in the relationship between children and parents is brought about by your desire to create heaven on earth. The dream is that you will create this heavenly family where you can finally find love and feel needed.  In addition you will release these wonderful, perfect children into the world who will make such a difference, or at least have the level of success that you never reached. You are a wonderful parent and they are wonderful children. If you now have adult children or –god forbid- teenagers (just kidding), you know what has happened to that dream. How much fear do you have for your child or your adult child? What concerns do you have about their choices? Where do you see them as helpless victims of other people or the world? When you worry about your children, you aren’t seeing their divinity. You are not seeing the perfection of the lessons they are drawing into their classroom as they attempt to awaken from the dream. This has nothing to do with your children. They are simply your projection of your inner fears and separation from God. Own all of that. It does not matter what you or your children accomplish on the earth plane. Heal yourself. Set your children free to find their own divinity. Again, the best support you can provide them with is your own self-healing.

Your role as parent ends when your children leave home. It was probably over long before that, but now it is impossible to ignore. You succeeded. They survived childhood. If you ignored your own needs in order to be a parent, you can stop that now. Take care of yourself. This is much easier to do if you have also given up the role of being a child to your parents. If you haven’t, if they still run your life through the power you give them in your mind, it is never too late to reverse that. Free yourself from your parents as you set your children free. Your primary relationship is now with Spirit. Your children and your parents are all peers, siblings, as you heal the rift with your true parent, with God. Your job is to see all your family members through the eyes of Jesus, to see them as perfect, innocent, unconditionally loved Children of God. This is the true relationship between parent and child.

When the relationship with your parents is not healed and there is frustration with your children, you will probably experience your marriage as less than ideal, also. All these relationships are being created by the same unhealed mind. You might make the decision to stay together for the children, fearing that they would be badly damaged by a divorce. It is not my job to tell you whether you should stay or leave; you must trust your own guidance to make that call. However, if you blame your partner for the problems in the marriage and leave, you will likely go out and create the same problems in another relationship. Don’t confuse cause and effect. Your mind is the creator of all your experiences, so that is what needs changing. In that awareness, you still may realize that you and your partner’s goals are so different that a change to a relationship with greater alignment is desired. However, if you put on a front for the children and stay together for their sake, it will be another example of telling them one thing and then doing another. They will know, at least on an unconscious level. This will not give them support in navigating relationships on their own as adults. Yes, this will be their creation, but don’t fool yourself into believing that you help your children by living a lie. Be honest with your children that you are having difficulties in the marriage and that they have nothing to do with them. Tell them that you are doing your best to sort things out. If you are unable to solve the marital problems, let your children know, without putting them in the center of the situation, and separate. If you find that you are not able to create an amicable split with your partner, you are not a victim. Whatever you do, try not to ever put the children in the center of your marriage/divorce. Don’t try to get them on your side or set them against your partner. This is not appropriate. It can never serve the child. A child is not ready to be your adult friend. Your relationship with your spouse is about you, don’t project it anywhere else. Take responsibility.

As you can see, this subject of parents and children is enormous. Humans learn through relationships more than anywhere else because of the nature of projection and the fear and difficulty connected with looking at the self honestly.  No relationship is more fraught with confusing entanglements than that of parent and child. Therefore, no relationship provides more fertile soil for spiritual growth. Fortunately, as with all relationships, you don’t need their presence or their cooperation to heal. What is your creation can be totally balanced by you alone, of course with the support of Spirit. Don’t be shy about asking for that help. You are a divine child and a divine parent.

God Blesses You

Sanhia

How can we not see children as innocent victims?

It’s a funny thing, but I have never talked to a human who didn’t have parents. Sometimes, one might not know who his birth mother was; there was an adoption and the mother’s identity is hidden. In this case there are two mothers that you have stories with, one that abandoned you and one that you can have the everyday issues with. Even if there are no identifiable mothers, you will have numerous tales with foster parents, relatives, or orphanages, along with the actual birth mother relationship. There is always a father, also, even if the mother doesn’t know who it is. Present or absent, which is of course its own drama, you have a history with him along with any other men who have played that role for you. Within the illusion, everyone has two parents, and many stories come with those relationships. An interesting thing about the parent-child relationship is that it is a lifelong one. Most relationships are for a short period – perhaps only a one time meeting, or for a length of time – but only a few traverse your whole life. The relationship with a parent is carried deep within you, particularly if you haven’t taken full responsibility for it. This is true even if there has been a separation, whether through death or from personal choices. The relationship is a constant presence. If there were an order of importance of relationships in the illusion, these might be the biggest ones. Many of you, if you are honest with yourselves, blame your parents for one thing or another. You believe you are the way you are because your father was so cruel or because your mother was so judgmental. So, you are a victim all of your life because of whom your parents were. This is not true. That is the ego’s story. It is another way of confusing cause and effect.

The mass consciousness presents this illusion that a pure, innocent, helpless baby is born. The child is a blank screen onto which the parents will begin to write. Such a responsibility! If they do things right, the child will thrive; if they do things wrong, the child will suffer. What a burden! Fortunately it is an illusion. Children hardly come in as blank slates; they arrive fully formed. Of course we are not speaking physically, but as we know the physical you is not the true you. Physically, infants are helpless, but mentally they carry with them all of the ego beliefs of guilt, fear, and victimhood they have burdened themselves with through countless incarnations since their imagined separation from God. What happens is that children create experiences in the world just as you do as an adult. From the first day onward, and even before that in their prenatal experiences, children create in accordance with these beliefs. Like you, they project their guilt onto others and receive punishments they believe they deserve, which will hopefully square them in God’s eye. Now they have others, particularly their parents, who they can blame and point a finger at. You all did this, and you are still doing it.

I want to talk about this from a few different perspectives – firstly from your specific relationship with your parents. As you were growing up it certainly seemed that you had no choice. You couldn’t pick up and leave or select different parents. You couldn’t avoid abusive situations at school, in your neighborhood, or with relatives. You felt yourself to be a victim. You simply had to endure these experiences. But then, as now, you always had the ability to say that the outer world did not affect you. In some places you made this choice and your parents’ words and deeds did not touch you. You knew they were not the truth. You created your own truth in these places. If you are not an only child, you see how your siblings developed differently – none of you are alike. If you were blank slates written on by the same parents, you should have turned out the same. Yet, you and your siblings are quite different. Why? Because you each created your own experiences and made your own choices in dealing with them. It was not so much a question of what happened to you as how you dealt with it internally. Did you practice forgiveness and seeing the divinity in your parent, or were those skills yet to be developed? The potential was there to access those truths. This is not to point a finger or to say that it was your fault that you were not more aware, but simply to shine light on the reality of the situation. You came to wake up and Spirit provided you from birth on with the opportunities to do just that. You came in believing in your victimhood and you proved yourself right.

At some point you left home. Now you are on your own. Your parents are no longer in your day-to-day life. Yet, in how many ways are they still running it? What judgments did they make about you that you took on as your own? What fears did they instill in you that follow you around even when your parents’ physical presence doesn’t? Unless you do a forgiveness process, your parents will continue forever to run your life, even though you have been an independent adult for years. If you tell yourself that you are over all of that, that you are an adult and your own person now – wonderful! But take a good look at each of your parents and notice where you have any judgment remaining about them, or about the way they raised you – or about things they are still doing today. Where you find judgments you are discovering the places where they still run your life. This is projection, a confusion of cause and effect. You are always the cause of everything that happens to you. The world is always the effect. This is true now; it was true when you were a child. Your judgments of your parents are a refusal to admit the truth. It is time to grow up. Stop being a helpless child. If you were not really a victim then, you are even less so now. Be an adult and take responsibility. It is yourself you are judging. Handle it. You know how to do that – kindly, gently, lovingly, but firmly. There is no kindness to your parents or to yourself in projection and blame. They are attacks. Blame is a statement that you are a helpless victim. You pretend that you didn’t choose these parents, but you did. You may scream that you didn’t ask to be born, but you did. You created the perfect parents for you, the best classroom for you to learn the lessons you came to master so that you could awaken – leaving the pain, the guilt, the suffering, and the belief in separation from God that are a part of the world of duality – and come home. You chose the perfect parents to support you in doing that. Their job ended years ago. It’s over, complete. Now the only work left to be done is yours.

Until you do this work, you will recreate you parents in all of the authority figures you meet in your life. It might be your boss and it certainly will be your partner. If you have not forgiven your opposite sex parent, you will find yourself married to that parent. It will make no difference what your spouse does; you will perceive them acting as your parent did. Remember that it is all you. There is no other. You are the creator of everyone in your life. You will create your mother and father everywhere you go. Make it simple for yourself. Rather than dealing with challenges with every person you meet every day of your life, just heal with your parents. Give gratitude to Spirit and to them for playing this game with you, for being your teachers. Look where you have judgment. Let Spirit lift that and help you to forgive. Ask for gratitude for having these perfect parents who came into your life to teach you exactly the lessons you came to learn. If you are not certain what the lessons were, request to understand what you came to learn from your parents.

In conclusion, you are all children. When you were a physical child it seemed that your parents were on another level. They certainly had the physical power. In truth, you were all children, asleep and hoping to awaken to your true selves. You and your parents are siblings, as is your brother Jesus. Your only job is to love them and to love yourself, to forgive them and to forgive yourself. To enter the kingdom of God you become like a child: innocent, pure, forgiven – the very idea that the mass consciousness holds of the newborn. Become the child you never got to be in this body. You are the Child of God.

God Blesses You

Sanhia

Is there any place for fun on the ascension path?

The last several messages have been somewhat intense, so I thought we would have a little more fun this time. In this message now we will talk about fun, joy, and play. Perhaps you are taking things too seriously. If what you are experiencing is an illusion, why not have more fun with it? I have an assignment for you. Each time you find yourself being weighed down by the seriousness of your now moment, think up a joke about your situation. Make it so funny that you can’t wait to find an audience to share it with.

You are aware that your divine nature is the truth of you. You understand that you don’t have a lot of control over how long it will take until you fully realize your divinity and leave this physical illusion. In the meantime, since you have nothing really important to do – except, of course, whatever Spirit has in mind for you – you might as well have fun. If there is to be a choice between joy and misery, between fun and boredom…..is this a hard decision to make?

It is not so easy to have fun when you are feeling like a victim, so those thoughts and feelings will have to be jettisoned. It is also quite a challenge to enjoy yourself when you feel weighed down by lots of responsibilities. It is time to let go of them as well. Perhaps you feel that you have to earn your fun time, so you will work now and play later. Try turning that one around. If you are truly doing God’s work you will be feeling ecstatic. The teaching from the mass consciousness is that this world is a very serious place and that you have to apply yourself, work hard, and make the right choices or life will just run you over. Such a responsibility you have! When you look at that it is overwhelming. Sometimes it just makes you want to lie down and die. That couldn’t be any worse than living with that much pressure. But, unfortunately, it is not okay to die. That is not one of the choices. You have to let God kill you. Am I the only one seeing the humor in all of this? Instead, be counter-intuitive. Decide that nothing here matters, that there is nothing important to do. None of it means anything. You might as well dance and sing and play and do whatever is fun. This leads to the hilarious irony of the human condition. When you want to leave because you can’t take it any longer, you can’t. You are stuck. Even if you break the biggest taboo and off yourself, you will eventually come back and pick up where you left off. But, when you are having so much fun that you couldn’t imagine wanting to be anywhere else, that’s when you might leave.

The world has it pictured that if you want to go to heaven, ascend, or get off the wheel you will have to work really hard. To achieve such a goal you have to pray, be good, and deny yourself. There is so much that is required every day, every moment. It’s impossibly hard. Then you die and you come back and do it all again. The counter-intuitive thing is not to try to do any of those things. You don’t try to be good. You don’t try to be right. You don’t try to do any of the things that the ego says you should do. Instead you ask yourself what would be fun today. What is your play in this moment? Even if there are dishes piled up in the sink, have fun. Maybe you put on earphones and listen to music while you are cleaning. Maybe you play with bubbles. Allow it to be fun. Tell yourself that if it isn’t fun, it isn’t worth doing. Joy becomes your value. This becomes your training. When that voice comes in and says “Yes, but you should….” you jump up and say, “I know who you are! I don’t listen to you anymore.” You can recognize the voice when you hear the devil. The devil’s middle name is Should.

The funny thing is that this is true about everything. Whatever you think it is that you want – let it go. Just have fun. You think you want a relationship. Let it go. Look around at your friend’s relationship. Does that look like fun? Let it go. Have fun. Maybe one day part of your fun includes playing with someone else, someone who wants to have as much fun as you do. But, what is important is having fun, not having the relationship. If you have to give up fun to have a relationship, well that’s no fun at all. Replace the word relationship with anything else…money, dependable car, children who listen – it doesn’t matter what it is. If you really think you want whatever it is, then give it to Spirit. Spirit runs a highly efficient lost and found department. Everything gets to where it is needed. If it will truly increase your joy, it will come to you. If it is something that will end up taking away your joy, that will be a struggle – do you really want that? It’s a strange thing. You say to God or Spirit that you want something. You ask for it because you think it will make you happy. Cut out the middle man. Don’t ask for what you think will make you happy. Just ask for happiness. Ask to be eternally joyous. If you knew how to do that, you would have done it long ago. But admit that you don’t know anything, especially about how to be happy. So who are you to be demanding certain things, thinking they will bring you happiness. Be a happy idiot. Turn it all over to Spirit.

This includes ascension. Look at the fuel you have given to the ego when you ask for that. “You think that you can ascend? You think you are good enough for that. Oh, you’ve got a lot of work to do.” and you are off to the races. What you want is total ecstasy. When you experience that in a body, there is an opening to realize ascension. Ascension is not getting out of jail; it is the knowing that there is no jail. When in doubt, laugh. When unable to laugh, cry. Then let it all go. You probably didn’t hear it here first, but “don’t worry, be happy”. Remember always….

God Blesses You

Sanhia

What is the difference between a special and a holy relationship?

One of the goals of most people, including those on a consciously chosen spiritual path, is to find that special relationship, that special person, that soul mate that completes you. My job today is to throw cold water on that dream. This topic, like many we discuss, could be covered in book length form, but we will narrow the focus to making a few observations.

Let’s start at a basic level. A pattern that tends to happen in relationships is that you are attracted to another person for certain qualities that they seem to have. Perhaps it a physical attraction; you like the way they look. It might be their smile or there is an incredible sexual energy between the two of you. Maybe you are drawn to them intellectually; you like the way they think and you enjoy talking together. It may be common interests that draw you together – you share a love for music or the outdoors. Perhaps the connecting bond is of a more spiritual nature. In all likelihood, it is some combination of these different possibilities. What commonly happens is that the thing that initially attracted you eventually becomes an issue that you have difficulty dealing with. What you once loved now gets under your skin. Perhaps you then decide to leave and try another relationship. You go through the same cycle again and again. Or at some point you might decide to settle with the relationship you are in, rationalizing that overall, the pluses overrule the minuses. Maybe you have a lot of time invested in the relationship, and/or children, and/or shared property or a business. But these days, people are more likely to leave, choosing a relationship that fits them better.

Why does this pattern occur? Why don’t we just fall in live and live together happily ever after? Let’s focus on two reasons. First, as we mentioned, you are drawn to this other person because of certain qualities they possess. You want them to continue to be that way, to please you as they initially did. This is what we call conditional love – as opposed to loving them simply for whom they are, allowing their sense of identity and person-hood to evolve and change. Instead you love them for whom you perceive them to be, and if they perform in any other way you are upset and feel betrayed. Then you may begin to look around. The truth is that they never were who you thought they were. You projected upon the other person what you wanted to see. Conditional love is the first major roadblock to creating a successful relationship. The other person is not acting as you wish them to; this is not acceptable.

The second challenge is a little more subtle. You are looking for someone to make you whole. There may be thoughts such as “I can’t live without you”, or “You are my better half”, or “We complete each other”. You are thereby expressing the judgment that in order to be truly happy, you require someone else’s loving approval. We call that codependency. You depend on somebody else to be satisfied. You have a need for the other, which brings on an anger directed at them for that dependency. It is a place where you can’t win. Part of you wants to push the other away and the other part can’t live without them and wants to hold on. It sounds pretty hopeless and sad. How can one ever have a successful relationship?

The relationships we have been talking about are special relationships. You hold the other as more special than all other people. It’s the flip side of you not being enough. You make them more than enough, so they must eventually let you down. You are not seeing yourself as divine. You cannot experience your divinity and, at the same time, have a need for a special relationship. Special relationships are built upon your fear of and separation from God. They stem from the belief that you have to be special in order for God to forgive you. Since God never judged you, no amount of specialness will do the trick. There is no need to earn forgiveness. God loves you unconditionally. However, the ego believes that if you can find somebody special who also believes that you are special, maybe God can find you special, too. If that specialness ceases to exist, what is God going to do to you?

The resolution of this quagmire is in seeking a holy relationship rather than a special one. A holy relationship is grounded in unconditional love. You have no expectations for the other person; you hold no judgments. No matter what your partner does, you love and accept them. This thought brings terror to the hearts of most people. It brings on fears of being a helpless victim. I want to remind you that your partner is your mirror. Whatever you judge in them, you judge in yourself. You can use your desire to control or change them to instead forgive and love yourself for whatever it is you perceive in them. Acknowledge that this is you. The ego wants to pretend it is not. The ego wants to point the finger so that you can stay special in God’s eye. The ego wants the other to be the one punished. Take responsibility. Acknowledge that this is you and forgive yourself and your partner.

Accept that your record in choosing partners has been less than stellar. Give the job of attracting your next partner to Spirit. Your holy partner will have one function and one function only. That is to be aligned with you in realizing personal divinity. It is possible for you to have a holy relationship where your partner does not share that intention, but it puts all the weight on your shoulder because your partner is expecting a special relationship. For you to act in the “right” way for them all of the time will be a major challenge for you. They will not be happy to find you choosing God over them.

I will tell you quite honestly that if your intention is to be absolutely true to yourself and to love yourself unconditionally in order to realize your divinity, you have a real challenge to accomplish that within any relationship. There are few models out there in how to behave in a holy relationship. The mass consciousness only shows you special relationships as the ideal. In fact, you may find this work easier to do when you are not in a relationship. It is said that when the student is ready the teacher will appear. I will modify that to say that when the person on the ascension path is ready, the partner will appear. Many of you have this thinking reversed. You seek the partner first, who will magically bring you to heaven, rather than first becoming what you wish to attract. When you get to the point where you realize you don’t need a partner to support your spiritual growth, you may attract one. Neediness will only attract a special relationship.

All that has been said up to this point is here to support you in being able to make the choice for a holy relationship. Once you have made that choice, you are really on your own. As mentioned, there are no models out there for how to proceed. You don’t know how to behave in a holy relationship. The only thing certain is that the ego will struggle to salvage something special out of it. All that you can do is to notice moment by moment where you have attachment to anything about your partner or the relationship and give it to Spirit. The holy relationship is fully guided by Spirit, as the special relationship is guided by the ego. To give yourself a fighting chance in your holy relationship, it is helpful if your partner and you have this as a shared, expressed intention and agreement between you. In this way you travel through the darkness together. You did not create this illusion and physical body to be experienced alone. You created other people so that you could project your guilt and fear on them. By yourself you could live in the illusion that none of that exists, but when you are in the presence of others, your judgments are inescapable. This allows you to see them and to take ownership of them. Your partner is always going to fulfill this function for you above all others.

When you intentionally take on the holy relationship, you learn to take 100% responsibility for everything that happens. If you allow yourself to be a victim to or in blame of your partner about anything, you are in illusion and denial. This is the challenge. It is also a great gift and a great opportunity. When two people choose to have a holy relationship, the ascension process is accelerated for each of them. It supports both in looking at the truth and in doing the required work. The irony and ecstasy of it all is that when you release the expectations of conditional love, you open up the possibility of enjoying full and complete happiness in the relationship. There is no limit to the upside of a holy relationship. The downside is no different than that of a special relationship. But, you have the momentum with you that comes from having chosen a holy relationship. Spirit is always there to support you. The perfect thing is always happening in your holy relationship to support your realization of your divinity. The only commitment that you can truly make in a holy relationship is to see divinity in your partner and in yourself in every moment, and to forgive and let go of anything that does not live up to that. That is God’s relationship with you always, except that there is no work involved for God. He always sees you as perfect.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

What if my “old stories” are good ones?

We have talked many times about changing your “old stories”, taking responsibility for the things that trigger pain and suffering in your life, and facing the fears connected to those stories using the five-step process. Many of you have done wonderful work in transforming these fears and experiencing more love and peace in your lives. This message is for you. If you have not yet chosen to take responsibility for your “old stories“, doing so may be the next step for you. For the rest of you, please read on.

It is not only the fear-based “old stories” that keep you stuck.  All of your stories keep you mired. What do you mean by that Sanhia? There are stories that give you a positive feeling, stories like: “My intelligence is a great asset”, “I am good at healing my body”, “People like me and I get along well with others”, “I am beautiful (handsome)”, or “I have a wonderful primary relationship”. These are things that others might look on with envy. You may look at them and say that even though you have pain and crap in your life, you have this to feel good about. All of these feelings stand in the way of realizing your ascension.

We have talked some before about special relationships. It is not our purpose to go into that subject today, though we intend to cover it more fully in a future message. When you like things about yourself, as we have just described, or are happy about how things are working out in your life, it is like having a special relationship with yourself. You are seeing yourself as special. As with the sad stories, there is a basis of comparison. With the painful stories there is a sense that others are faring better than you are. With the success stories or positive qualities there is a comparison with those who have less. What you are creating is a sense of being special or different, whether that difference is felt as a positive or a negative. Behind all of this is a desire for God to notice how special you are. You are so special that God doesn’t have to punish you now. Either you are so good that God will want to reward you, or you are so bad that you are already punishing yourself (or is it God who is already punishing you?). These are just two sides of the same coin. The special relationship is the same as the un-special relationship. Neither is holy. They are either especially good or especially bad. But the holy relationship is divine and perfect as it is. You are perfect as you are.

You can thank Spirit for gifting you with whatever seems positive so that you can use it to realize your divinity, as you can also give thanks for whatever seems to bring you fear and pain, so that you can use it to realize the truth of who you are. The truth of you has nothing to do with your positive attributes or with your perceived weaknesses. You are absolutely divine and perfect as you are. Anything that seems to differentiate you from another is simply a gift from Spirit to support you in the realizing of your divinity and to offer as a gift to others in realizing their divinity. It is not that you can help others because you are so evolved, rather you thank Spirit for what is given you, knowing that the receiving is always connected with the giving to others. If you accepted the fullness of God’s love, you would give it to others. If you allowed yourself to receive the fullness of God’s love, you would realize your ascension. We do call you ascended now, because this love is always coming to you, at every moment of every day. It is only a question of your willingness to receive it.

When you hold yourself as special, you are holding yourself separate from others and from God. You are unable to receive the fullness of God’s love. You may feel that you don’t deserve it or you might think you are so good that you don’t need God. That is what got you here in the first place. That is the oldest story. It is even older than the story that you are not worthy and God is going to punish you. It is the story that you don’t need God. It is the crazy idea that you can create on your own, separate from God. That is the ego’s voice. When you have stories of being good at something, you are listening to the ego’s story. It is the ego saying you don’t need God.

As you let go of this story that you are so smart and competent, you don’t replace it with being so dumb and helpless. That is the ego, too. The Holy Spirit simply says “I am”. And that’s it. Nothing else is the truth of you. Or, if you wish, “I am love” or “I am loved”. Anything else is there to separate you from others and from God, and you are guaranteed to stay in hell until you let there be only God.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

 

Does love require me to sacrifice?

There is a great confusion that intertwines love and sacrifice. It is this belief that if you love someone or something, you must make sacrifices for them or for it. This belief causes many problems. It is a confusion because love is of Spirit and sacrifice is of the ego. The ego believes that the only way to get something that you want is to give up something that you also want. We can call that a “win-lose” situation.

I want to begin with a short history of this perplexity. Most of you are familiar with the Judeo-Christian story, expressed both in the Old and the New Testaments. Let’s start with the Jewish Bible, the Old Testament. It is filled with sacrifice. God, or Yahweh, is constantly demanding something from the “chosen people”. Many are animal offerings, but in one particular story we have Abraham, the father of Judaism, being asked to sacrifice his beloved son, Isaac, who had come to him late in life as a reward for his devotion to the one god. Abraham was told to take Isaac up the mountain for this surrender. Reluctantly he agreed. Sacrifice for the love of god. God lets him off the hook at the last moment. The message, however, is that the proof of love is a willingness to make sacrifice. This is found carried forward into Christian belief. There the doctrine is that Jesus gave himself, that god sacrificed his only son, to free us from our sins. Love and sacrifice. I want to remind you that no such thing actually happened with Jesus. There was no sacrifice involved. This was a gift of love freely given from Jesus’s heart, following the loving voice of Spirit. If you want to hear the truest expression of Jesus’s teachings, I recommend A Course in Miracles. If you read the New Testament, I suggest that you limit yourself to the words attributed to Jesus, and still use your discernment (see last month’s message).

I want you to know that the god of the Old Testament, who for many is also the god of the New Testament, is really the ego. It is not God. God never asks for sacrifice. How could an all-powerful, all-creative, all-loving God ever have a need that could only be filled by human sacrifice? It makes no sense whatsoever. It is a crazy thought. Sacrifice is an attack, not an expression of love. When you sacrifice for another, what you are communicating is that that person is not divine. You are affirming their helplessness. Only by the sacrifice of your blood can they survive, be happy, and prosper. What a story! This is an attack. An attack on another is really an attack on yourself. How can someone else not be divine unless you also are not divine? Every sacrifice you make is attack upon yourself.

You don’t usually offer blood sacrifices any more, although patriotism may ask that you give your life for your country. While some believe in giving their life for their country, others believe that they must be willing to surrender all to help the oppressed of the world. This is not to suggest that to aid another is an attack. Only when the action is offered in the spirit of sacrifice is it an attack. When you do for another out of the love in your heart, out of divine inspiration, it is not an attack. This is something you truly desire to do. It doesn’t matter to you how it is received, whether there is gratitude. It is done out of your joy and freely given.

Look at your relationships, especially your committed relationships. In what ways do you feel that you have to deny yourself in order to maintain a relationship? Or even to have it to begin with? How many women deny their independence, career aspirations, or freedom in order to have a relationship? How many men feel tied down, denying themselves, not allowed to be “real men” anymore because of a relationship? When children come along the feeling of the necessity for sacrifice increases.

The place to begin is by recognizing that sacrifice is not an expression of love, but is an attack. It is a byproduct of guilt. Your ego will tell you that you will lose everything if you do this. This voice will tell you that others are dependent upon your self-denial. Have the intention to stop making sacrifices. Ask Spirit to support you in strengthening your will to give up sacrificing and to always come from love. When the fear comes up – and it will – use the five-step process to help you transform it into love. When you are in a state of unconditional love you can clearly hear Spirit’s guidance.

When your ego is telling you that there are others out there depending upon your support, I want to remind you that it is all you. Everything that you see is you. If you perceive neediness that seems to require your sacrifice, that is your neediness. If someone tells you that if you really loved them, you would give them what they demand from you, it is your own ego that is speaking. How long will you believe that you have to thrash your own back in order to become pure enough for God? Sacrifice is self-flagellation. It is an attack upon yourself. This is why some people are terrified by love. The fear is that loving another will call you to a deep painful sacrifice. The only way to be free, in that case, is not to love. What a tangled web the ego weaves. Avoiding love will not bring an awareness of your divinity. If you stop sacrificing, instead committing to love and to transmuting fear into love, you will be able to hear Spirit directing you. This guidance will always lead you into love and out of sacrifice.

This is a great challenge. It is a fearful thing to give up sacrifice. The mass consciousness says that sacrifice might buy you redemption, might bring you forgiveness from God. But, it doesn’t work that way. Sacrifice only keeps you separate from God, who requires nothing from you and offers you everything. God only asks you to be your true self. Set yourself free.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia 

Why doesn’t money feel spiritual to me?

Michael just pointed out to me that we have never directly addressed money in these messages. Ulla says that money seems to be a problem for everybody. It is funny that even though you have largely done away with physical money in your modern economic system, it remains just as big a problem. When we talk about illusion, what better place is there to look than at money? What value does that piece of paper have? You can’t eat it or drink it. You can’t build a house or take a trip with it. All you can do with it is give it away, or stow it away. Money is an absolute illusion; it has no value in and of itself. Even the coins that once were precious are now made mostly of low cost metals. You often replace money with a little worthless plastic card or even digital numbers in cyberspace. The thing to understand about money in all of its manifestations is that its primary purpose, as is true with absolutely everything else in your life, is to support you in realizing your divinity. You are immortal, divine beings. That is what you came here to realize.

Money is a tool to help you do just that. You may believe that the purpose of money is to help you survive, but your survival is guaranteed. Your ego may scream out that you don’t just want to survive, you want to survive and stay in your body. If you think that money is what allows you to stay in the body, and the ego uses the body to stay separate from God and in pain and suffering, then money must be the thing that keeps you trapped in your earthly hell. If we do away with money, can we eliminate pain and suffering? It is not quite that easy. Ask those who have tried to live outside the financial system.

Let us start with looking at the connection of fear with money, the anxiety that there isn’t enough. Money is the best way that you know to attract what you desire into your life. Whether you are looking at the basics of food, water, shelter, and clothing, or the extras that seem to make life worth living, there does not appear to be enough money. You may decide to sell yourself out. You may take a job that you probably wouldn’t do if fear were not raging in your mind. Some of you have mastered this denial process by finding work that provides some enjoyment and/or pays relatively well, but if you won the lottery, would you wish to continue with your job as it is? For many of you, your story is that your job takes too much time and energy, has too many distasteful qualities, and leaves you with too little money. The choice seems to be between either working harder or being poorer. There may be fear around deservedness, and poverty can be seen as the only route to heaven. Jesus warned us about the spiritual dangers of the love of money. When you place financial success as your most important goal in life, you have chosen a goal that has no value. If you believe that money will bring you happiness, you are deceiving yourself. No matter how much you create, it will not be enough. Which billionaires have said that they have enough and have stopped accumulating wealth (the answer may be those who are beginning to look at their own mortality)? But the deception is equal if you believe that poverty will bring you happiness. Remember that money is pure illusion. What do you value? If your priority in life is to experience your divinity, the purpose of money is to support that happening. Perhaps you wish to attend trainings or workshops, go to retreats, or receive sessions for your spiritual and physical healing. You don’t feel that you can afford them, so your spiritual growth feels blocked off. You can’t afford to ascend. That is quite a story.

We begin the healing of your relationship with money by reminding you that the dollar, kronor, or other currency is the illusion of all illusions. It is not real, but exists simply as a temporary convenience. It is a bridge. When you can fly, you don’t need bridges. Money provides an easy way to exchange. It releases you of the need for barter, where you must find the person who has what you want and also wants what you have. Money provides a basis for trust where you give service one place and receive service in another. Eventually there will be no need for it. Fear of lack requires you to keep score. As you realize that the supply is infinite, the need to keep track disappears. You don’t have to wait for the world to get there. You can go there at any time. You can go there now. You cannot experience your divinity while you are carrying fear about money. Is it possible for God to be unable to generate enough? Is there a limit to the creative power of God? If you believe that you cannot generate enough, you have separated yourself from God. You must not be divine. Part of my job is to shake you gently and remind you that you are divine. Listening to your ego is the only thing standing in the way of manifesting whatever you desire in the moment. You choose to pay attention to your ego instead of to Spirit. Your ego says you are undeserving and that there isn’t enough to go around. It tells you that wanting more is selfish and takes away from what others can have. It warns you about what God does to selfish people. The way to ascension, according to the ego, is to do without, to be an ascetic. On the flip side, the ego tells you that those who have abundance have sold their soul to the devil, and they will burn in hell forever. You will be rewarded for your suffering.

What a story! When you decide to stop listening to the ego, your experience will change. It probably won’t transform all at once, because it is difficult to stop listening to that lie instantly in its entirety. Ask Spirit to come in and guide you to the truth about money and manifestation. The function of money is as a medium of exchange so that you are supported in the moment as you are following your path or doing the service you came here to do. Money is not a diversion for you. You can be fully focused on love and supporting others to realize their divinity, as you realize your own. Do the work of listening to Spirit and letting go of the ego. Keep your eye on the prize. Whatever is essential for today will be there. There is no need to worry about tomorrow, because it never comes. You are always in the now. You are always supported by Spirit. When your fear about money surfaces, use the five-step process. Go right into the face of your fear. You will never be able to accumulate enough money to lose the fear. If you are working a job or staying in a relationship because of fear of money, fly into the face of that fear. Staying is a slow death that will not allow you the true happiness of realizing your divinity. If you want to do something that supports your purpose, but worry about not having enough – spend the money. Trust. Do the process. Remember that it is all illusion. It is just a movie. Play the role your heart is set on. God is on your side.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia

How do my home and relationships affect my intention to ascend?

We talked several years ago about home and having a sense of home. I encourage you to reread that message, but we are going to talk a little differently about home today. We have also talked about relationships before. Again, you may wish to review that subject, but we will go in another direction with the information today. Finally, we previously talked about intention, and of course you are invited to revisit that correspondence – in fact, it would probably be the most supportive of the three in fully receiving today’s communication. We are going to weave these three topics together for you.

Everything always begins with intention. Everything. If you do not express clear intent, you, by default, give your life over to the mass consciousness and to the confusion brought forth from your past lives. When you have the goal to experience ascension, the only thing between you and the full realization of your divinity is the illusion of time. That could involve lifetimes, but it will happen. Much of what we share with you is given with the hope that you might reduce the time it takes you to realize your divinity. Knowing what you want, expressing intention, and making ascension the most important thing in your life – these are the great time reducers. Whatever else you are considering, choices you have before you, confusions you have – ask yourself, “Is this in line with my intention to ascend?”

I want to specifically direct this focus of achieving the realization of your divinity in two ways: first dealing with home, then with relationship. I have mentioned several times about the ”mirroring” effect of others. Whenever you are around others, you see yourself reflected in them. Whatever you notice about them shows how you feel about yourself. Your judgments of them are your judgments of yourself. Your love for them is your love for yourself. If you feel yourself to be a victim to them, it is you who have created the attack because of your belief in a need for punishment. As you are conscious of this, you can use it as a healing tool. Your ego does not want to accept these reflections as you. It wants to project on others and to be a righteous martyr. Take this home with you. Work with this within the safety and security of your home. These are frightful things you are encountering. It is a great challenge. It is not easy to fully confront your illusions and your fear, even using the five-step process. That’s why we encourage you to create a safe home. This is a place where you will have minimal opposition from your mirrors. You will never escape them completely, nor would you want to if your primary intention is to ascend. On the other hand, if you are constantly challenged by your reflections, you go crazy. It’s more than you can handle.  Create a secure place; I call that home. For some of you this home is the place where you live. But for others your residence is not a shelter. For some of you, home might be a group you get together with, a close friend, or a quiet spot in the woods. That is where you feel protected. The first thing we are suggesting around home is that you make sure you have it somewhere. If your residence doesn’t provide such a haven, find someplace else. Look for a space where you feel nurtured and supported in your spiritual process.

If you are in a relationship that doesn’t support your spiritual process in a nurturing manner, I ask you what your first priority is? What is your intention? If it is your chosen purpose to become aware of your divinity, living day-to-day intimately with someone who does not reinforce this path makes that realization much more difficult. If this is the case for you, perhaps you have created a safe pocket within your residence. But, still you must venture out into the rest of the house and interact with your partner. The questions are ” What are you choosing?” and “Why are you choosing that?” Perhaps your response is to say that you know that your partner is your mirror and so you are using your partner to promote your spiritual growth by taking responsibility when you become upset over what is going on between the two of you. I say that is wonderful, but do you need or want your life to be a constant barrage of perceived attack from your mirror? If you are open and willing to see your fears and what your ego is telling you, there will be plenty of opportunities to experience your ego’s voice as you go through your daily life. But, if you are ”sleeping with the enemy”, it can actually be harder to change your story.

Let’s talk further about relationships. Some of you, as you read this, are saying, ”What relationship? I wish I had one.” If this is your situation ask yourself which is more important to you, realizing your ascension or having a relationship. Be honest. If being in a relationship comes first, it is not likely that you will manifest one that supports your spirituality. You will also likely find the relationship to be a co-dependent one, because you may be entering it out of neediness. What other parts of yourself might you be willing to deny to keep your partner from leaving? If you decide to leave, you have to begin the whole process over again. What will make a new relationship any different? I encourage you to be conscious of what you are choosing. Ask yourself what you really want from a relationship. What would leave you unfulfilled if it were not a part of your partnership? If you have expressed your intention to realize your divinity, how can a relationship be fully supportive if it is not based on a mutual desire to experience your divine natures?

If ascension is your highest intention, you might be more strongly supported in it through creating a safe home for yourself, rather than focusing on having a relationship. If this leaves you feeling hopeless, your issue for healing is hopelessness. Create a network of friends or groups that share and support your intention. Choose a home where you can work with your process, deal with your ego, face your fears, and focus on loving yourself and others unconditionally, without having anyone in your face. Also, work with your fear of never finding the right partner. Come up with a new story. What likely happens is that you will create the partner who fully supports you in your ascension process when you don’t need that person, when you are already doing that for yourself. If you are looking for a partner to come in and save you in your spiritual process, you are back to a co-dependent situation. Ask Spirit to bring a supportive partner into your life. This partner can magnify the effort you are already making. Nobody ascends alone. We are all connected. You are never alone. When the person is ready, the partner will appear.

Your ultimate relationship is with yourself and with Spirit. Your process is expedited when you are clear about your intention, create a nurturing home, and are uncompromising when it comes to choosing a partner who supports your intention. I am not necessarily suggesting that if your relationship does not feel supportive, you should move out today or have the locks changed. But, it may be time to initiate a different kind of conversation with your partner. See if that mutuality can be found. If your partner is not able to support you – you have a clear choice to make. Remember that your truest partner is Spirit, and Spirit always loves you unconditionally.

God Blesses You,

Sanhia